(She goes to applaud JUAN, who is showing off his prowess on the surfboard in rough waters.)
SANTIAGO: (Dejected, crushed, to ANA, who looks at him sympathetically) You made a mountain out of a mole hill. You never had a sense of proportion, or balance between cause and effect. You can’t kick someone when he’s down.
ANA: No doubt another of my middle-class failings?
SANTIAGO: All marriages go through crises. The sensible thing to do is to split up without making a fuss. And make it up again later. But you had to turn the whole thing into a Greek tragedy.
ANA: It’s all that education you gave me. That’s probably the trouble. Weren’t you the one who ‘rescued’ me from the middle classes? Didn’t you teach me to view everything not from an individual standpoint but from a moral, social, revolutionary one? Right, when judged on that criterion you behaved abominably. (Approaches him lovingly.) But these are your problems, not mine. I let you go, I let you come back. We separated and we made it up again when you wanted to. I put up with you telling me all about the psyche and the libido, and your theory of love based on mutual co-operation, and the fact that you only made love to me once in a blue moon. But it really isn’t my fault if you happen to like Greek tragedy, Mark Griffin.
(SANTIAGO leans against her and ANA strokes his head, as if he were a little boy.)
SANTIAGO: It’s true, I’m an incorrigible romantic, but wouldn’t it be nice for once in one’s life to play the lead in a Greek tragedy?
(They both look at JUAN, who has finished surfing and is now strutting about like a peacock: an imaginary crowd of people congratulate him and pat him on the back. He exhibits the cup he’s won at the surfing championship. He looks happy and a little intoxicated.)
JUAN: (To KATHIE) Why didn’t you come to the party they gave for me, darling? You’re never there when I need you. Everyone was asking for you and I didn’t know what to say to them. Why didn’t you come? It was in honour of the cup-winner, Kathie! And that cup-winner happens to be your husband! Doesn’t that mean anything to you?
KATHIE: Absolutely nothing, Johnny darling. I’m fed up to the back teeth with your championships, your surfing and your celebrations. That’s why I didn’t go to the party and that’s why I’ll never go to anything to do with surfing again. Because I’ve never seen quite so much idiocy or quite so many idiots as I have among surfers.
JUAN: I know what the matter with you is. You’re envious.
KATHIE: Of you?
JUAN: Yes, of me. Because I go in for championships and I win them. Because I’m lionized and photographed, and parties are given in my honour. Not only in Peru, but in Hawaii, Sydney and South Africa as well. Oh yes, you’re envious all right. Because you’re a famous little nobody, whose only claim to fame is the fact that you’re my wife. That’s why you knock surfing the whole time. Pure envy.
KATHIE: (Laughing) I quite understand why you think I’m envious of you, Johnny darling.
JUAN: And you’re jealous too. Don’t try and deny it! You’re desperately jealous of all the young girls who are constantly coming up to me. Because there are dozens of them, hundreds of them in Lima, Hawaii, Australia and in South Africa — all feeding out of my hand.
KATHIE: It’s quite true. They’re bowled over just because some halfwit can keep his balance on a surfboard …
JUAN: And there you are — eating your heart out. The only reason you didn’t go to my party was so that you wouldn’t have to see all the pretty girls that were there, flirting with me. Because they’re young and you’re getting old. Because they’re pretty and you’re getting ugly. Because you’re eating your heart out with jealousy.
KATHIE: Not any more. I ate my heart out to begin with. Those first few months, those first few years.
JUAN: You still do. Every time a girl takes my fancy, your face becomes all contorted, and your voice starts to quaver. Do you think I don’t notice?
KATHIE: (Lost in her memories, not hearing him) I couldn’t believe it. Every time I found you out, I nearly died. Were you with Adelita? Yes, you were. Were you with Julie? Yes, you were. With Jessie? Yes, with Jessie. With my closest friends, with my worst enemies. I felt humiliated, hurt, knocked sideways. It is true, I was eating my heart out with jealousy. I felt the world was coming to an end, I was the most helpless creature on earth. How could you go around making love here, there and everywhere while at the same time telling me you loved me?
JUAN: (A little confused, trying to call a truce) And what on earth’s that got to do with it? Love is one thing, making love another. Of course I loved you. Don’t I still? Even though you didn’t come to my party. You let me down, silly. That’s all. But all this business about making love, I’ve already explained it to you: it doesn’t mean anything. It really doesn’t count. I take all these girls to bed with me and pssht, I forget about them. Like going out for a drink, or changing my shirt. It’s a physical necessity. To keep the old dicky bird happy. I don’t put my heart into it, silly. That’s reserved for you. It’s like when you were my girlfriend, remember? ‘I can’t go out with you tonight, because I’m going out with a floosie.’ I ask you: Whoever heard of a girl getting jealous just because her boyfriend goes out with a floosie? Well, it’s the same thing, don’t you understand?
KATHIE: I understand perfectly. That’s why I’m not jealous any more. It wasn’t out of jealousy I didn’t go to your party.
JUAN: (Conciliatory) All right, I said that because I was in a temper. I’m over it now. I’ll let you off this time. But just this once, mind. Don’t ever play such a dirty trick on me again. (Smiling) Now whisper in my ear, so that no one can hear you, do I or do I not drive you wild with jealousy?
KATHIE: You never drive me wild with jealousy now, Johnny darling.
JUAN: (Playing, and making a great show of affection) Tell me I do, that I drive you wild, go on, I like it. Does your little husband drive you wild with jealousy?
KATHIE: One gets jealous when one’s in love. I stopped loving you some time ago now, Johnny darling.
JUAN: Are you being serious?
KATHIE: When I began to realize what a nonentity, what a fool you were …
JUAN: Have you any idea what you’re saying?
KATHIE: … when I saw how empty your life was, and what a mess you’d made of mine. It was then I stopped being jealous.
JUAN: So you want an argument, do you? You desert me when I most need you and then you give yourself the luxury of insulting me into the bargain.
KATHIE: It was when I started to despise you — then, my jealousy began to disappear. There’s not a trace of it left now. So you can give your heart as well as your dick to all the pretty girls you want, Johnny darling.
JUAN: Ah, it must really have hurt you, what I said. I was ready to make it up with you, silly. We’d better talk about something else, I’m sick and tired of hearing the same insults over and over again. You’re like a long-playing record.
KATHIE: No, let’s carry on talking about jealousy. After all, you started it. How many times have you been unfaithful to me? How many pretty girls have there been?
JUAN: (Furious again) More than you might think.
KATHIE: Twenty? Fifty? A hundred? It can’t be much more than that. (Calculating) Let’s see now, we’ve been married ten years — a hundred would make about ten a year, practically one a month. You’re right, it could be more. How about a hundred and fifty? Two hundred?