I’d explained to Georgia why I was ready to call it a night and that had went over about as well as giving a cat a bath.
“Every damn time we are supposed to hang out he shows up and ruins it,” she’d pouted. She was right about Beau interrupting our night, but it had a whole lot more to do with Reid being in the same vicinity as me that night.
“It’s not like that tonight, G,” I had tried to smooth it over. “It’s just been a long day and I can’t be here any longer.” I’d pleaded with my eyes and hoped that she understood.
“Fine¸” she’d huffed. “But next time, if he shows up,” she glared in Beau’s direction. “I’m going to cut him.”
“Deal,” I’d agreed, forcing a laugh. “Next time it will just be us.”
In the two years that I’d been seeing Beau, I could honestly say that he had been a good boyfriend, which made me feel that much guiltier about the mixed feelings I was having about Reid.
The infuriating way my heart raced when I was near him had me thinking seriously about my relationship with Beau. He was handsome in his own way—perfectly styled blonde hair, crystal clear blue eyes and his crooked smile. He was attentive and we enjoyed spending time together. But still, what I felt when I was near him physically didn’t compare to the way Reid seemed to push my buttons. Before Reid showed back up, it was easy to pretend that what I had with Beau was just as real. That our connection was as deep as what I’d had when I was with Reid. I’d keep batting those swarming thoughts away because no matter what my subconscious was trying to tell me, I refused to let it interfere with my relationship any more than it already had.
Before I had a chance to climb inside the truck, I felt Beau’s arm wrap around my waist. He quickly turned me into his arms and his mouth found mine. The firm press of his lips was quickly interrupted by a sudden sweep of his tongue into my mouth. I drew my arms up around his neck and tried to kiss him back with as much enthusiasm as he was giving me. It was a bit unlike him. Most of our public displays of affection were limited to hand holding and the occasional peck, but I felt that I owed him a decent kiss after the awkward situation I’d put him back in the bar.
Seeing Reid again had to be on the short list of things Beau Gregurich probably never wanted to do. He’d never admitted it to me, but I knew that he secretly wished he had been the better rider. That he would have gotten the attention of the sponsors and team owners. And, not that he didn’t enjoy owning a race shop, but I could see the wistful look on his face when he talked about how he used to race with customers.
I had a history with Reid, and that was something that could never be taken away or erased. Just like Beau’s. Reid had every right to not like the fact that I’d chosen to be with Beau when he left, but he also had no say in the matter.
That was the thing about history—it was meant to stay in the past. Unfortunately, mine had shown up all shiny and sinfully tempting right here in the present.
Beau’s hold on me continued to tighten, and when I felt his hands start to get a little more forward, I broke our kiss.
“Easy there, buddy,” I teased.
“Can’t help myself,” he said without a trace of apology in his voice. His sudden urge to make-out in the middle of town was followed up with words of urgency. “I just want you to know how much I fucking want you.”
While it was nice to hear that I had some kind of intoxicating hold on my boyfriend, the out of character response from him had me a bit concerned. His lips found my neck as he continued to try and coax me into returning his newfound passion. I had an inkling that there was more to it than just my irresistibility to blame for Beau’s behavior.
“Does this sudden burst of passion have anything to do with seeing Reid?” I asked. He didn’t respond immediately and it took me placing my hands on his chest to get him to focus. “Beau?”
“You want me to lie and say that it didn’t feel good to stick it to him?” He smirked and the expression irritated me.
“Well no, but I also don’t want you kissing me just because you hope he sees us out here either. I’m not a prize you can flaunt in front of him.”
“But you are.” He smiled. “You’re the best prize. That asshole has always had a leg up on me, but I got the girl. I won you.” He pressed his lips to mine. I wanted to believe that he was being sincere and charming with his words, but I was starting to feel like his main reason for being with me was to “stick” it to Reid. “Nora,” Beau said, pulling me from my thoughts. “I know what you’re thinking and I’m not just with you to get back at him. I’m with you because you are beautiful and smart. He wasn’t even around when we started dating, so you know it’s not like that.”
“Do I?”
“Yes,” he promised. “You and I being together had nothing to do with him. It’s just an added bonus that it pisses him off.” He let out a light laugh and I had to admit, seeing how aggravated Reid was did bring me a little bit of joy. If that made me a jerk, then so be it. He’d gotten to be the jerk for far longer.
Maybe seeing Reid had put our relationship into perspective for Beau. It had certainly made things a little foggy for me but if Beau’s aggressive want for me had been sparked by feelings of jealousy or even nervousness at the return of my ex-boyfriend, I’d take it. Maybe we both needed a jolt in our relationship to get us to the next step. Whatever that may be.
While we seemed to have a comfortable relationship, my sister had made a valid point about me not being able to take the next step with him. Most of my friends were either living with, engaged, or married to their significant others, while we were just in some sort of limbo. What Beau and I had was simple and didn’t require me over thinking every single detail, but maybe I should have been. We’d never really had a sexually-charged, can’t-keep-our-hands-off-each-other kind of thing, but we could have.
“I’m sorry,” I said as his lips continued to travel up my neck. “I didn’t mean for things to be awkward in there.”
“It was bound to be a little bit awkward.” He leaned back, his arms still cinched around me. “But it is what it is.” He tilted his head and I immediately regretted even putting the thought in his head. Did he really believe what he was saying? Did he not even feel the slightest bit odd standing there with Reid and me? “Unless you’re having second thoughts or something?”
“No,” I assured him. If he didn’t think it was weird, then I wouldn’t either. This is exactly why I needed Beau in my life. Simplicity. “Not at all,” I added, trying to convince myself. “I just mean... it’s weird to see him, right?”
“Look, babe,” he pressed a kiss to my forehead. “Both of us have a shitty history with Travers, yes... but it’s in the past. We all ended up exactly where we are supposed to be. He went after what he really wanted and I got you.”
His words made me wince and I hoped Beau didn’t notice. It still hurt to think that Reid wanted racing more than he wanted me. Even after all the effort I’d put into not letting it.
“You’re right,” I agreed, pushing my feelings aside. “The past.” The past, which I have apparently been holding onto a little more tightly than I realized. I needed to forget about what I had with Reid and focus on what I had with Beau.
“Besides that, it’s not like he’ll be here long. Winter’s coming and he can’t train in Halstead for his big, fancy career when the ground is going to be covered with snow.” He shut my door and the sudden reality of it all hit me.
Reid wouldn’t be around for very long. Three months. Any fleeting thoughts I was having about him had to be dashed. He’d be leaving and I’d be damned if I was going to let it affect me the same way it had last time. I’d keep my distance and keep my guard up. The man sitting next to me starting his truck was the man I was supposed to be with.
“My place or yours?” he asked, reaching over to grab my hand.
“Yours is good,” I smiled, knowing that deep down I was making the right call by leaving with Beau.