Ears pricked, he rounded a bramble patch and crossed a stretch of withered ferns. His heart quickened as he imagined Dovewing scanning the forest, hoping to catch a glimpse of him. A purr rumbled in his throat. He was nearly there, the misty forest air slicking his pelt. Please still be waiting!
He raced up the slope to where the trees thinned. Ahead, sunshine seeped through the mist and lit the sheltered glade. Beyond the bracken he saw pale gray fur. His heart soared. Dovewing. Two days apart had been too long. He crashed through the damp undergrowth and scrambled to a halt beside her.
Her eyes flashed with relief. “You came.” Dovewing thrust her muzzle into his neck fur. She was trembling, and he thought he could hear a note of worry in her mew.
She was silent so long, apprehension spiked through Tigerheart’s fur. “Did some cat find out about us?”
“No.” Dovewing’s ears twitched nervously.
“What is it, then?” Tigerheart stared at her blankly. What could be so bad that she couldn’t find the words? “Something’s wrong. I can tell…” Have you stopped loving me? He braced himself.
“I’m expecting kits.”
Kits? Shock numbed him. “Mine?” He wasn’t thinking straight.
“Of course yours!” Fury flared in Dovewing’s eyes. She lifted a paw to bat at his muzzle.
He barely felt it. He was too shocked by what she’d said. Kits… our kits!
He took a deep breath to gather himself—the last thing Dovewing needed was him gawking at thin air.
“That was a dumb thing to say. I’m sorry. You just… took me by surprise.” Then the tingling of joy he’d been starting to feel began to fade. “Have you told Ivypool?” Dovewing had always been close to her sister.
“Ivypool barely talks to me these days. I think she suspects I’m seeing you.” She stared at the ground, her eyes full of sadness. Alarm rippled through Tigerheart’s pelt, and his breath quickened. How could they hide their relationship now? What would this secret do to ShadowClan? It was already so fragile. Cats were bound to take sides in a scandal like this. And the fallout might destroy the uneasy peace that had passed for unity since the rogues had left.
He saw the expectation in Dovewing’s gaze shrink to disappointment as he stared at her wordlessly. His thoughts were spinning, but he had no idea what to say.
She looked away. “This makes things so much harder, doesn’t it?”
Tigerheart shook his head. Having kits with Dovewing was something he’d dreamed of, and yet… “It’s bad timing, Dovewing. Our warriors are losing respect for Rowanstar. And they keep looking at me, like I’m supposed to take his place.”
“Is that what you want?” Dovewing stared at him with wide eyes.
Tigerheart shifted his paws, trying to find the right words. “ShadowClan is weaker than it’s ever been. They need a leader they can believe in.”
Dovewing inhaled sharply. “And that leader has to be you?”
“I don’t know.” Tigerheart stared at the grass beneath his feet. “I’m trying to support Rowanstar, but that might not be enough.”
“What about me?” Dovewing’s mew caught in her throat. “What about us?”
Tigerheart felt his heart breaking. There must be an us. I’ve struggled too long without you… “I love you, Dovewing. I will always love you. We can sort this out, I promise.”
Raising his head, he cleared away the choking thoughts of Clanmates and responsibility and gazed at Dovewing. He could see her belly growing already and imagined the tiny kits inside. A purr broke from his throat. Our kits. He weaved around her, letting his purr throb through his whole body and hers. “Our kits will be beautiful and brave. They will grow into fine warriors.”
As he spoke, hope flickered in his chest. Perhaps this was meant to be—perhaps these new kits would help restore ShadowClan to its former strength. “You can join ShadowClan with me. We could be together. There would be no more hiding or lying, and we could bring up our kits in the same Clan.” It seemed the perfect solution. His belly tingled with apprehension, but he hoped that she would be excited about raising their shared kin in the pine forest. It might take her a little while to get used to ShadowClan’s ways, but she’d be so well cared for, he knew she could be happy there.
He knew they could be happy there.
His thoughts were tumbling so fast over one another, he hardly felt her freeze. Only when he pressed his muzzle against her cheek did he realize that she’d become as stiff as stone.
“I can’t do that.” She stared at the ground, defeat heavy in her gaze.
“I know it will be hard, but Dovewing, it might be the best thing for the kits.” Tigerheart tried to catch her eye. “The best thing for us.” And for ShadowClan.
Slowly she lifted her gaze. Fear shimmered in her eyes. “I wish I could believe that,” she began haltingly. “But… I’ve been having dreams.”
“Dreams?” Tigerheart struggled to understand. Dovewing wasn’t a medicine cat. She’d lost her special powers moons ago when the Dark Forest had been beaten. “All cats have dreams.”
“Not like these.” Dovewing’s gaze glittered unnervingly. Whatever she was about to say, she believed strongly. “These dreams mean something. I can feel it.”
Tigerheart’s pelt prickled with alarm. “Are they… bad dreams?”
“I dream of the ThunderClan nursery. I’m alone in the camp, and I’m watching the nursery from the clearing. Something feels wrong, so I go to look inside.” The fur along her spine lifted as she remembered. “It’s empty. The nests are old and tattered, and shadows are creeping from the corners. They swallow the floor and the nests. I run outside, but the shadows follow. They reach through the entrance like dark flames and lick the walls, growing darker and stronger until the whole nursery is lost in blackness.”
As she spoke, Tigerheart felt like he could see everything she described, so clearly. He had to shake his head to chase the images out of his head. “It’s just a dream,” he told her, not sure if he believed it himself.
Dovewing drew away. “But it’s not!” Her mew was taut with fear. “I have it again and again, and every time I do, I wake up filled with dread because I know it’s a sign.”
Tigerheart blinked at her. The fear in her eyes was real, but he tried to tell himself it was just because she’d been worrying about this by herself for so long. She could share the worry with him now. “Have you asked Jayfeather or Alderheart about it?”
“How could I?” Dovewing lashed her tail. “They might guess.” She glared down at her swelling flanks. “I’ve been expecting for a moon and it’s starting to show. They may have already guessed I’m expecting kits. Telling them I’m having dreams about the nursery will just confirm it!”
Tigerheart tried to make his voice sound bright. “If a medicine cat believes that nursery dreams are normal, perhaps they are.”
“Not like this!” Dovewing hissed.
“Well, you could ask them if they’ve had any signs from StarClan.” Tigerheart was starting to feel exasperated. Why was Dovewing so sure her dreams were special? “Maybe they’ve had a sign that will explain your dream. They’re medicine cats, after all. You aren’t.”
“I don’t need a medicine cat to explain my dream!” Dovewing’s eyes flashed with frustration. “I know what it means. It means our kits mustn’t be born in ThunderClan!”