“How old are you?” Eleanor hardly recognized her own voice, toneless and detached, utterly without inflection.
Rosamund Clifford seemed startled by the question, but she answered readily enough, saying that she was nineteen. Younger even than Marie, Eleanor’s eldest daughter by the French king.
“My lady?” A second woman was approaching, coming from the direction of the springs. She had a pleasing face, plump and good-humored, flushed now from her exertion and the cold. “Did you find that silly beast? Most likely he took off after a rabbit…” Her cheerful monologue trailed off as she realized they were no longer alone in the deer park. Her smile was warily polite, far more guarded than the girl’s, and it was easy enough for Eleanor to guess her role: Rosamund Clifford’s watchdog.
These intruders were very well dressed and Meliora dropped a quick curtsy in deference to their obvious rank. But as she straightened up, she saw Eleanor clearly for the first time. The color drained from her face, leaving her sallow and shaken. She fell to her knees in the snow, saying in a strangled voice, “My lady queen!”
Rosamund’s head swiveled toward Meliora, then back to Eleanor. Hers was an easy face to read; Eleanor saw her puzzlement give way to realization and then, horror. She, too, dropped to her knees, staring up at Eleanor in mute despair, for she knew that there was nothing she could say in her own defense.
Eleanor was aware, then, of an overpowering exhaustion, unlike any fatigue she’d ever experienced. She was suddenly so weary in body and soul that she could almost believe she might sicken and die of it. There was a hollow sensation in her chest and a lump in her throat, a bitter taste in her mouth. Her gaze flickered over the girl kneeling in the snow and she could no longer remember why it had once seemed so important to seek Rosamund Clifford out, to learn the truth.
When she turned and walked away, she took them all off balance. Rosamund and Meliora stared after her in disbelief and Petronilla, no less dumbfounded, scurried to catch up to her sister.
Meliora heaved herself to her feet, but Rosamund stayed on her knees. “God in Heaven…” The face she raised to Meliora was streaking with tears. “She is great with child, did you see? I felt so shamed, so foul… But I did not know, Meliora, truly I did not!”
“Know what, lass?”
Rosamund stifled a sob. “I did not know that she loves him. But you saw it too, did you not? That she does love him?” She gave Meliora a beseeching look, and the older woman understood what she was really asking-for reassurance that Meliora could not offer. Her silence was an answer in itself, and after a few moments, Rosamund rose, began to brush the snow from her skirt. Wiping her cheeks with the back of her hand, she managed a wan smile. “Do I look presentable enough for an audience with royalty?”
“I hope to God you do not mean what I think you do!”
“What would you have me do, Meliora? I have to face her sooner or later. And if she wants to shame me before every living soul at Woodstock…” Rosamund’s voice faltered, and then she said, “Well, she… she has that right.”
“Child, she is more than a jealous wife. She is a queen twice over, Duchess of Aquitaine in her own name, and you have given her no reason to feel kindly toward you. Trust me, you do not want to face her while the memory of the king’s betrayal is still so raw. Better that we seek shelter in the nunnery at Godstow and send urgent word to the king-”
“No!” Rosamund shook her head so vehemently that her veil lost the last of its pins and fluttered to the ground at her feet. “I cannot do that, Meliora. I cannot burden the king with this-”
“Mary, Mother of God! You have to tell the king, and not just for your own protection. This woman is not a shunned wife to be put aside at a whim, nor is she one to suffer in silence. You truly think she will not confront the king? Better he be forewarned by you than ambushed by her!”
Rosamund opened her mouth to protest, closed it again as the logic of Meliora’s argument prevailed. “You are right,” she said softly. “He must know. But I will not take refuge with the nuns at Godstow. I owe the queen more than that. I owe Harry more than that.”
Meliora blinked, for that was the first time she’d heard Rosamund call the king by his Christian name. “I do not understand you, child, and for certes, you do not understand Eleanor of Aquitaine!”
“I understand that she is carrying his child, that she has faced the dangers of the birthing chamber again and again to bear sons for him. And she is not young, Meliora, not any more. All my life, I’ve heard about her great beauty, but I saw none of it today. I saw a woman haggard and careworn, a woman grievously hurt by what I’ve done. I cannot change a single yesterday, cannot take back even one of those nights I spent in Harry’s bed. Nor can I make amends by vowing to sin no more. I am not strong enough to turn him away. I love him,” she said simply, as if that was a soul-bearing revelation, and Meliora groaned in frustrated futility, for by now she’d learned that Rosamund’s deceptively docile demeanor hid a stubborn streak wider than the Thames itself.
“God help us both,” she said with a grimace, and then cried out in pretended pain as she faked a stumble. Rosamund would not leave her and by feigning reluctance to put weight upon the injured ankle, she bought them both some time. Not that it would be enough. She feared that a lifetime would not be enough.
When she could delay no longer, she reached for her walking stick and followed Rosamund back along the path toward the manor. A strange silence seemed to have enveloped Woodstock. The bailey was deserted; even the gate was unmanned. Rosamund came to an uncertain halt, her resolve beginning to waver. When Meliora suggested that they go to her chamber and await the queen’s summons, she agreed hastily enough to reveal her fear. But they’d taken only a few steps before they saw Master Raymond striding toward them.
Summoning up the shreds of her courage, Rosamund moved to meet him. “I… I await the queen’s pleasure,” she said, as steadily as she could.
He’d always treated her with impeccable courtesy, but she’d sensed that he did not approve of her liaison with the king. A shadow of that unspoken disapproval showed now upon his face, confirming her suspicion that the steward was Queen Eleanor’s man. “The queen,” he said, “is gone.”
They stared at him, so obviously stunned that he felt the need to say again, more emphatically this time, “The queen and her sister and her men… they are all gone.”
Eleanor paused in the great hall to speak to her daughter, and Petronilla seized the opportunity to search for her sister’s midwife. Bertrade was not an easy woman to miss, a statuesque, handsome widow with bold black eyes, the life-loving zest of the Gascons, and little patience with fools; not surprisingly, she and Eleanor had established an immediate rapport and she had assisted in the births of the last two of Eleanor’s children. It did not take long for Petronilla to learn that Bertrade was not in the hall, but when she turned back toward her sister, she discovered that Eleanor had gone, too. With a servant in tow, she hastened across the bailey toward the queen’s chambers. As she expected, she found Eleanor in the bedchamber, slumped down on a coffer as if she had not been able to muster the energy to reach the bed. One glance at her sister’s ashen face and she ordered the servant to find Dame Bertrade and fetch wine and food. Snatching up a laver of washing water, she knelt by Eleanor’s side and began to blot the perspiration from her sister’s brow.