I gave her a courteous nod.
`People will be racing to tell you,' I said, `that Petronius and I spent an hour in a brothel near the Circus Maximus this afternoon. It's famous for offering disgusting services as bribes to the vigiles. We were witnessed coming out nudging each other guiltily, and with happy grins.'
`I know,' she said.
`I was afraid of that.'
`I dare say!'
The slender links of one bracelet slipped over her fine wrist as she lightly held a scroll. Her feet were bare. She, who should have been cushioned on swan's-down amidst some great man's marble colonnades, had been reading in the warm sun, high above the squalor of the Aventine where she lived with me.
I selected a cool and formal tone. `People overreact sometimes. I was with Petro when he reached his own house and couldn't make his wife answer the door. A neighbour shoved her head through a shutter and bawled, "She's taken the children to her mother's and your dinner's been thrown at the cat." I had to help him pick the lock. He loves that cat; he insisted on going in to look for it.'
She smiled. `Every hero should have a tragic flaw.' I happened to know she didn't care for cats. I suspected she despised heroics too.
I thought it best to maintain a serious approach. `Despite his pleading, I felt unable to escort him to fetch Arria Silvia from her mother's lair.'
`Did you leave him by himself then?'
`He was all right. He had his cat…' Something caught in my throat. `I wanted to make sure you were still here.'
`I'm here.'
`I'm glad.'
It was mid-afternoon. I had been as quick as possible, but I had gone to bathe. Now I was clean. Every inch of me was oiled and scraped, but I felt as if I walked in grime.
`Were you worried?' I asked.
Her dark eyes were fixed on me with a steadiness my heart was failing to match. `I do worry when I hear you're in a brothel,' she told me in a low voice.
`I worry when I go into a brothel myself.' For some reason, I suddenly felt clean again. I smiled at her with special warmth.
`You have to do your work, Marcus.' There was a shade of resigned amusement lurking deep in Helena Justina's gaze. It seemed to me she had deliberately placed it there. While she waited for me she had taken her decision: either we could fight, and she would only end up feeling more wretched then when she started, or she would make it be like this. `So what did you think of the brothel?' she asked quietly.
`It was a dump. They didn't have a monkey. I wouldn't take a senator's daughter near the place.'
`The monkey in the one we ran through was a chimpanzee,' she reminded me. Her tone was serious, but the seriousness was a joke.
Sometimes we did fight. Sometimes, because she wanted me too badly to use reason, I could make her quarrel bitterly. Other times, the intelligence with which she handled me was breathtaking. She set trust between us like a plank, and I just walked straight across.
I could see a very faint twist at the corners of her mouth. If I chose to do it now, with merely a look in my eyes I would be able to make her smile.
I crossed the room. I came right up to her and took her by the waist. A slight colour stained her cheeks, echoing the unopened rose pinned to her dress. As I had suspected, the perfume was there for somebody who knew her well enough to come close enough to treat her tenderly. Not many had ever had that privilege. I breathed slowly. A whisper of cinnamon crept over me, not just any perfume, but one I particularly liked. It was fresh, only recently applied.
I let myself enjoy looking at her for a while. She enjoyed herself letting me drown gently in old memories and new expectations. I must have dropped my hand without intending it. I felt her fingers entwine in mine. I drew up both our hands and held hers hard against my chest.
The room was silent. Even the street noise beyond the balcony seemed far away.
Helena leaned forward and brushed my mouth with a kiss. Then, with no flutes or incense or sticky wines, without needing to negotiate a price, without even needing words, we went to bed.
XXIV
BY THE TIME consciousness reasserted itself, my sister Galla had told my sister Junia, who had rushed to relate the tale to Allia, who – since she could no longer exclaim with Victorina, who was dead – told Maia. Maia and Allia normally did not get on, but this was an emergency; Allia was almost last in the queue and she was bursting to amaze somebody with news of my latest offence. Maia, who alone amongst them had a conscience, first decided. to leave us alone with our trouble. Then, since she was a friend to Helena, she set off for our apartment to make sure nobody had left home over it. Had rapid action been necessary, Maia would have comforted anyone she found sobbing, then rushed out to look for the runaway.
While she was still on her way to us, I was rousing myself.
`Thank you.'
`What for?'
`The sweet gift of your love.'
`Oh that!' Helena smiled. I had to close my eyes, or I would have been in bed with her until nightfall.
Then she asked me, wanting answers this time, about our visit to Plato's Academy. I rolled over on my back, with my arms behind my head. She lay with her cheek against my chest while I told her my impressions, ending with the fact that I had known Lalage long ago.
Helena laughed at the story. `Did you tell her?'
`No! But I left a few hints to worry her.'
Helena was more interested in the results of our official enquiries: `Did you believe her when she claimed she was going to resist having the place "protected" by a male criminal?'
`I suppose so. To call her competent would be an understatement! She can run the brothel and easily beat up anyone who tries to interfere.'
`So maybe,' suggested Helena, `she was telling you more than you think.'
`Such as?'
`Maybe she would like to take over where Balbinus left off.' `Well we've agreed she wants to run her own empire. Are you suggesting something more?'
`Why not?'
'Lalage control the gangs?' It was an alarming thought. `Think about it,' said Helena.
I was silent, but she must have known I always took her suggestions seriously. Grumpily I accepted this one, though it was against my will. If we could say Nonnius Albius had stepped into the space left by his former chief, things would be much simpler both to prove and to put right. If we needed to consider newcomers, let alone women, the affair assumed unwelcome complexity.
Wanting to make sure I had listened, Helena sprang up excitedly, leaning over me on her elbows. Then I noticed her expression change. With a sudden mutter she turned away out of bed and left me. She scampered next door, and I heard her being sick.
I followed, waited until the worst was over, then put an arm around her and sponged her face. Our eyes met. I gave her the look of a man who was being more reasonable than she deserved. `Don't say anything!' she commanded, still white-lipped. `Wouldn't dream of it.'
`It can't be something we ate at dinner disagreeing with me, because we forgot to have any dinner.'
`Just as well, apparently.'
`So it seems you were right,' she admitted, in a neutral voice. Then Maia's voice exclaimed from the door, `Well congratulations! It's a secret, I dare say.'
`Unless you tell somebody,' I answered, biting back a curse.
`Oh trust me!' smiled Maia, deliberately looking unreliable.
She came in, a neat, curly-haired woman wearing her good cloak and nicest sandals so she could make a real occasion of simpering at the trouble I had caused. `Put her on the bed and lie her flat,' she advised. `Well this is it!' she chirped at Helena helpfully. `You've really done it now!'
`Oh thanks, Maia!' I commented as Helena struggled upright and I started clearing up.