Bill and Cirocco looked at each other. Bill shrugged, and gestured toward the remaining hut.
Cirocco sat awkwardly. There were many things she wanted to ask, but she was hesitant to start.
"How was it for you?" she asked, finally.
"If you mean the time between the collision and waking up in here, I'm going to have to disappoint you. I don't remember any of it."
She reached over and probed gently at his forehead.
"No headaches? Dizziness? Calvin should take a look at you."
He frowned. "Was I hurt? "
"Pretty bad. Your face was bloody and you were out cold. That's all I could see in the few seconds I had. But I thought your skull might be broken."
He felt his forehead, ran his fingers around to the sides and back of his head.
"I can't find any tender places. There weren't any bruises, either. Cirocco, I-"
She put her hand on his knee. "Call me Rocky, Bill. You know you're the only one I didn't mind it from."
He scowled, and looked away from her.
"All right, Rocky. That's what I need to talk to you about. It isn't just the... the dark period, August called it. It isn't just that I can't remember. I'm pretty hazy about a lot of things."
"Just how many things?"
"Like where I was born, how old I am, or where I grew up or went to school. I can see my mother's face, but I can't remember her name, or if she's dead or alive." He rubbed his forehead.
"She's alive and very well in Denver, where you grew up," Cirocco said, quietly. "Or she was when she called us on your fortieth birthday. Her name's Betty. We all liked her."
He seemed relieved, then downcast again.
" I'guess that means something ," he said. "I did remember her because she's important to me. I remembered you, too."
sirocco looked into his eyes. "But not my name. is that what you're having trouble telling me? "
"Yeah. " He looked miserable. 'isn't that a hell of a thing? August told me your name, but she didn't tell me I called you Rocky. That's kind of cute, by the way. I like that."
Cirocco laughed. "I've been trying to kill that name most of my adult life, but I always weaken when somebody whispers it in my ear." She took his hand. "What else do you remember about me? You recall I was the Captain?"
"Oh, sure. I remember you were the first female Captain I'd ever served under."
"Bill, in free-fall, it doesn't matter who's on top."
"That's not what I--" He smiled when he realized he was being kidded -"I wasn't sure about that, either. Did we ... I mean were we... ? "
"Did we fuck?" She shook her head, not in negation, but in wonder. "Every chance we got, as soon as I stopped chasing Gene and Calvin and noticed that the most man on board was my chief engineer. Bill, I hope I don't hurt your feelings, but I kind of like you like this."
"Like what?"
"You couldn't bring yourself to ask if we'd ... been intimate." She made the pause as dramatic as she could, lowering her eyes shyly, and he laughed. "You were like that before we got to know each other. Shy. I think this is going to be like the first time all over again, and the first time is always special, don't you agree?" She blinked at him and waited what she felt was a reasonable time, but he made no move, so she went to him and pressed close. it had not surprised heri she had needed to make her feelings quite clear the other first time, too.
When they broke the kiss he looked up at her and smiled.
" I wanted to tell you that I love you. You didn't give me any time."
"You never said that before. Maybe you shouldn't commit yourself until you get your memory back."
"I think I might not have known I loved you before. Then ... all I was left with was your face and a feeling. "" trust that. And I meant what I said."
"Mmm. You're nice. Do you remember what to do with that?"
"I'm sure it'll come back to me with practice."
"Then I think it's time for you to start serving under me again. "
It was as joyous as a first time, but without the awkwardness that usually goes along with it. Cirocco forgot everything else. There was just enough light to see his face, just enough gravity to make the heaps of straw softer than the finest silk.
The timeless quality of that long afternoon had little to do with the unchanging light of Themis. She didn't have any place she needed to be; there was no need to go anywhere, ever, for anything.
"Now's the time for a cigarette," he said. "I wish I had one."
"And drop your ashes down on me," she teased. "Filthy habit.
I wish I had some cocaine. It all went down with the ship."
"You can go straight. "
He had not withdrawn from her. She remembered how much she had liked that in Ringmaster, waiting to see if things would get going again. With Bill, they usually did.
This time was a little different.
"Bill, I'm afraid I'm getting a little irritated like this."
He eased his weight onto his hands. "The straw hurting your back? I can take a turn underneath if you want."
"It's not the straw, honey, and it ain't my back. It's a little more personal than that. I'm afraid you feel like sandpaper."
"So do you, but I was much too polite to say it." He rolled off and put his arm under her shoulders. "Funny I didn't notice it a few minutes ago."
She laughed. "If you'd grown spikes, I wouldn't have noticed it a few rates ago. But I wish we had our hair back. I fell pretty silly like this, and it's uncomfortable as hell."
"You think you got it had? I'm growing it back all over. It's like fleas square-dancing on my skin. Pardon me while I scratch." He did so, lustily, and Cirocco helped him get the impossible places on his back. "Aaaah. Did I say I loved you? I was crazy, I didn't know what love meant. Now I know."
Gaby chose that moment to walk in the door.
"Pardon me, Rocky, but I was wondering if we should do something about the parachutes. One of them already floated down the river."
Cirocco sat up quickly. "Do what with them?"
"Save them. They might be useful."
"You ... sure, Gaby. You might he right."
"I just thought it would be a good idea." She looked at the floor and shuffled her feet, glanced at Bill for the first time. "Uh ... okay. I thought maybe I ... could make something nice for you." She hurried from the hut.
Bill sat up and put his elbows on his knees. "Was I reading too much into that?"
Cirocco sighed. "I'm afraid not. Gaby's going to be a big problem. She thinks she's in love with me, too."
CHAPTER NINE
"What do you mean, good-bye? Where are you going?"
"I've been thinking it over," Calvin said, quietly. He removed his wristwatch and handed it to Cirocco. "You people can use this better than I can."
Cirocco was about to burst with frustration.
"And that's all the explanation we get? 'I've been thinking it over.' Calvin, we've got to stick together. We're still an exploration party, and I'm still your Captain. We've got to work together toward getting rescued."
He smiled faintly. "And just how are we going to do that?" She wished he hadn't asked that question.
"I haven't had time to work out a plan on that," she said, vaguely. "There's bound to be something we can do."
"You let me know when you think of something." "I'm ordering you to stay with the rest of us."
"How are you going to stop me from leaving if I want to go? Knock me out and tie me up? How much energy is it going to take to guard me all the time? Keeping me here makes me a liability. If I go, I can be an asset."
" What do you mean, an asset?"
"Just that. The blimps can talk around the whole curve of Themis. They're great with news; everybody here listens to them. If you ever need me for anything, I'd come back. All I'd have to do is teach you a few simple calls. Can you whistle?"
"Never mind that," Cirocco said, with an annoyed wave of her hand. She rubbed her forehead, and allowed her body to relax. If she was to make him stay, she had to talk him out of it, not restrain him.
"I still don't see why you want to go. Don't you like it here with us? "
"I ... no, not all that much. I was happier when I was alone. There's too much tension. Too much bad feeling."