At the same time, however, I knew that something was bothering Patty. I also knew what it was. Those tickets were still around, and they could just as easily be misused once again just as I misused them just a year ago.
The melody that I was playing switched to minor keys as I considered the awful burden that these tickets would be to me and whoever would inherit them next.
I ended the song on a note of hope.
I burst out of the music studio, completely rejuvenated. I must have looked a sight, with tears of frustration and happiness stained on my face. It didn’t matter to me.
“Are you all right?” Kristen asked me, surprised to see me upstairs in the living room.
“For the first time in a long time, Goddess,” I said, bending down to the recliner where Kristen was sitting to give her a long kiss.
I took a deep breath and faced Lynette, Patty, Camille, and Will. “I’m sorry for leaving like that before. There was a lot on my mind, and suddenly, things are making better sense to me now.”
There were a few murmurs of “that’s all right,” from the majority of the people there.
Patty simply looked at me strangely.
The six of us took two cars to the mall. Kristen, Lynette, and Will stopped at Martin’s, Kristen’s favorite dress shop. Patty, Camille, and I were just walking around.
It was just after noon on a Sunday, and the mall wasn’t crowded at all. We sat on a bench where we had a good view of one side of the mall.
“What happened in your studio?” Patty finally asked.
“Something that should have happened a long time ago,” I said. “I’ve decided to move on. Kristen has moved on, there’s no reason that I shouldn’t.”
“Huh?” Camille asked, confused.
“Camille, I’ve finally decided to put the tickets behind me.”
Camille looked at me as if I had two heads. “What? You’re getting rid of them?”
I shook my head. “Nope. I’m just refusing to let them run my life.”
Even Patty seemed a bit confused by this. “You said that you won’t get rid of them. Has that changed?”
“No,” I said. I thought about what I decided back in the studio. “I agree with both of you. Those tickets are evil! However, there’s something deep down inside of me that is telling me that I don’t have the entire story, and without knowing what I need to know, I can’t make the right decision about them.”
I turned to Patty. “I can understand your telling me to get rid of them, but that would only be foisting them onto somebody else. Camille’s sister got rid of them, Tim Hawking had them taken from him, but they are still around!”
Looking at Camille, I added, “You may be right about destroying them, but I don’t know how! What if I fail? I feel that I have an obligation—a duty!—to do the right thing.”
Neither girl contradicted me, which surprised me.
Finally, I said, “For the last year, I’ve been holding onto them, and only used them when I felt I needed to do so. There are still some problems brewing, including Sherry.”
“Sherry?” Camille asked, confused.
Patty and I quickly brought Camille up to date on Sherry’s problem.
“Yikes!” Camille said, shaking her head.
“Tell me about it,” I said soberly. “Anyway, I will deal with her as best as I can, and I’ll try to do it without the tickets.”
Patty looked thoughtful. “What if they are… like…” Patty stopped in mid-thought, apparently frustrated.
“Like what?” I asked.
Patty tried to speak again, and failed.
I started getting frustrated. “Like what?” I repeated. “Tell me!”
“Like… what if they are a test?” Patty finally blurted out.
“A test?” Camille asked.
Patty looked quite out of breath. It appeared that asking that one question took a lot out of her.
I didn’t have any idea what Patty was talking about. I realized also that something prevented her initially from asking the question. For some reason, it occurred to me that this might indicate that she was getting close to the truth.
“A test,” Camille mused. “Sort of like Job in the bible?”
“Huh?” I asked, ignorant of most of the bible. “The guy in the whale?”
Camille shook her head, “That was Jonah. Job was the person that was tested—as a bet. He had everything, and then God took everything away from him.”
“If I was being tested, then I failed miserably,” I said sourly.
“You could only say that if you know the nature of the test.”
I shrugged. I didn’t know what test I was being given, let alone if I passed it. “What are you saying?”
“You’ll have to decide whether to keep the tickets or get rid of them. That’s probably the test.”
It occurred to me right then that Camille’s answer was self-serving. After all, she claimed to have rejected the tickets. Was she insinuating that she passed a test that I failed?
“That’s as may be, Camille,” I finally said. I looked at Patty, and saw confusion in her eyes, which confirmed to me what I already decided. “I’m still holding onto them until I have more information.”
Camille surprised me by saying, “You know, that’s probably the best choice.”
The rest of our hour spent together was listening to Patty and Camille talk about what was going on in their lives since Camille moved to New England. I excused myself to visit Kristen’s favorite candy store and ordered a container of freshly made chocolate covered peanuts.
For the first time, I didn’t feel a twinge of guilt when I ordered Kristen’s delicacy.
Chapter 43—Seventeenth Birthday
On Monday morning, I found Roy waiting with Sherry as June drove me and my sister to school. I now knew that Roy and Merry were an unofficial couple, although I still did not come to terms with my feelings about this. The fact remained that Roy has always been one of my closest friends since elementary school, and I really didn’t want anything to come between us. I knew that I would need to investigate my feelings about this some time soon.
I gave June a kiss before I got out of the car, and I opened the door for Merry. As Roy approached us, I said, “Roy, I have a favor to ask.”
Roy glanced nervously at Merry and then back at me. “For you, anything.”
I smiled. “I have an idea to make this year’s talent show the best one ever. The money it makes is supposed to go to help out the chorus, so I figured you guys would be thrilled with what I have in mind.”
Roy looked a bit surprised. “Are you thinking of entering?”
“Not in the way that you’re thinking. I want to donate the services of the jazz band to help the performers look great. We have some bitchin’ players and singers, and as a back up band, we can really make people sound great!”
“The jazz band…” Roy’s voice trailed off, and I could see the cogs in his mind turning. A smile came to his lips.