Rilas rose to her feet to refill her cup of daru, and I was able to see the anger which now accompanied her weariness. I had no true understanding of those city-male doings of which she had spoken, yet did I deem it unwise to interrupt her speaking. Our Keeper had not had so effortless a stay in that city as she would have had me believe, but Midanna rarely acknowledged pain and difficulty. Far better to deny it in silence, and thereby find victory over the memory of it the sooner.
“Suffice it to say that the guilds are no more,” said Rilas, turning back to me with her cup refilled. “It took the presence of more than one of the clans to see it so, yet are all now free to do as they will, be it seat-making or trading or hunting or what have you. Those who wish to do a thing simply do it; should they possess the skill to do it well, many come seeking their services. For those who do the thing badly, there are none about to protect them from their lacks. They either seek out another thing to do, else do they, themselves, face starvation. A number of those without skill chose instead to take what they might no longer demand, therefore was it necessary to have warriors ever about, to keep the helpless from again becoming prey. A large number did we eject from the city, those who although without skill of their own, were masters to others who labored at various chores. These masters attempted to incite their followers against us and the folk we protected, but I refused to allow that to continue. Also did I deem it wise to have other warriors begin the training in weapons of those who showed the most promise. When once we depart from here, those who look to us for protection will no longer be able to do so, therefore must we leave those in our place to do the thing for us.”
“Males,” said I with a good deal of distaste, swallowing my daru to chase away the flavor of the thought. “City males who will wait no longer than the moment the gates close behind us to do the same to their brothers as was previously done. Who will the helpless then weep to?”
“Jalav, we cannot turn city folk into Midanna, even were we to make the attempt,” said Rilas, once more seating herself opposite me. “We are able to do no more than allow them the opportunity to see to themselves. Perhaps by then they will have learned not to place themselves in bondage to others. Would you now care to speak of the disturbance you feel, the disturbance which sits so heavily upon your shoulders?”
“Certainly,” said I with a shrug, watching her as she looked concerned even as I sipped again at my daru. “Which disturbance would you hear of first, Rilas? As there are so large a number of them, the choice of which to begin upon may as well be yours.”
“War leader, I do not seek to intrude,” said she softly. “Well aware am I of the error I made when I last insisted that you speak upon something you clearly had no wish to discuss. Had the males drawn weapons the fault would have been mine, yet I still do not understand the basis for their disagreement. It was you they discussed, was it not?”
“Indeed,” said I, grimacing with disgust. “Indeed was I the object of their discussion, for each of the males believes I am his alone, his to possess no matter the will of others. Such is the male manner of doing, a thing I have long since lost patience for.”
“They look upon a war leader of the Midanna as though she were a city slave-woman?” demanded Rilas, indignation straightening her where she sat. “They would dare so mindless a thing in the presence of her warriors? With her weapons and the love of Mida wrapped firmly about her? Have they no further desire to continue with their lives?”
“Their desire has little to do with continuing their lives,” said I, annoyed. “My time of capture to Ceralt you already know of, the manner in which he attempted to keep me from warrior doings during the occasion of our journey to Mida’s Realm upon this world. My time with Mehrayn was not the same, for the male truly wishes to see me with the prerogatives of a warrior—yet not with the prerogatives of a war leader. The use I have from him is strong and bold, overeager and ever-pleasing, yet does he refuse to accept that another might momentarily interest me, if only for the comparison. Nearly a hand of feyd past, the while we brought Midanna and Sigurri toward this city, I came upon a Sigurri warrior I had not previously seen. The male was not so large as others, yet was he more well-endowed than any other I had ever seen, and curiosity overcame me. The male swam in a stream a distance from his brothers, his golden body completely unclothed, and when he saw me gazing upon him from the bank, he swam to where I stood and pulled himself from the water.”
I sighed deeply, recalling the time most clearly, and Rilas smiled knowingly, for she, too, had been a warrior.
“He stood before me, the water falling from his pale hair, a smile of willingness upon the broadness of his face, and then he reached out a hand to put a finger to my swordbelt, ” said I, sipping from the daru to cool the warmth of the memory. “His smile turned quickly to a grin of challenge, for he dared me to put away the trappings of a warrior and join him in a battle of another sort; I discovered willingness within me, therefore did I remove my swordbelt, and then moved forward to press my body to his. The strength in his arms took no note of my weight as he put me to the grass with him, and then was my breech opened and pulled away, to allow his hands to move about me more easily. Soon were we joined in the battle of pleasure, and although I found the time enjoyable, I discovered as well that he had not the ability which Mehrayn possesses. We each found release, lay a moment beside one another, then went our separate ways as is done after a pause such as that.”
I rose to my feet as Rilas nodded, refilled my cup with daru, then turned again to look down upon her. “I know not how Mehrayn learned of the time, yet did he certainly learn of it,” I continued, remembering the annoyance that I had felt then. “He pulled me to the back of his kan, rode a good distance from the presence of both Midanna and Sigurri, then attempted to berate me for having taken another in his place. I cared little for such male foolishness and spoke my own words in anger at his gall, yet did he refuse to heed the voice of reason. He gave ear to none of it and instead took himself off, leaving me to return to our camping place on foot. My fury had grown so high by the time of my return, that I set Renin and her Sonna all about the place I had chosen to take my rest. When, after we had fed and all about sought their sleeping leather, and the male appeared to join me as always, the Sonna, obedient to my word, refused him passage through their ranks. Surely did the male howl in anguish for hind, yet was refused that darkness and each darkness thereafter. Males!”
“Indeed are they best avoided when not giving use,” said Rilas, thoughtfully. “Only now do I find meaning in the heated words exchanged a short while ago. He of the dark hair wishes to see you kept from all battle, the while he of the flame hair wishes to see you kept from all other males. They are both of them mad, to believe Mida would allow her chosen to be subject to such denial.”
Rilas then looked toward me with the scorn she felt, believing I would show the same, yet had she touched upon a point of much graver concern than the doings of males. I put the daru to my lips and drank deep of it, and when I lowered the cup I saw that she stared with something closely akin to fear.
“Surely did I misread your expression when I made mention of the goddess,” said she, her voice as soft as her eyes were widened. “Jalav, you are Mida’s chosen, sworn to her till the end of your feyd, more beloved than any before you! You have gathered and led the host which will vanquish her enemies! I could not have seen the look of blood-feud upon you at mention of her name!”