"And now?" Vrell sniffled. "Sir Eagan still does not wish to claim me?"
"He begged I tell you the truth but promised not to publicly claim you, not to upset your life."
"Whether all Er'Rets knows or not, my life is already upset. Mother, how can I live as I have? How can I pretend to be your heir? It is a lie."
"No," Mother said. "You are my eldest. I choose my heir."
"That is not how it is done. Carm should go to the Amal bloodline."
"No one need know."
"But I know." Vrell wandered to Mother's desk, trembling with a myriad of emotions. "I cannot live a lie any longer. It is all I have done these past months, and it has nearly destroyed my sanity. I will not be a fraud. I abandon my birthright to Gypsum. Let her accept this proposal."
"Averella!"
Vrell darted behind Mother's changing screen, behind the tapestry, and into the dark corridor.
Up, up, up the steps she ran, to the top of Ryson Tower. She hugged one of the stone posts that held the tower roof and gazed out over the vineyards that stretched to the horizon on all sides of Carmine. The sun hid behind a fluffy white cloud. A cool breeze blew against her face and tightened her skin as it dried her tears.
For so long she had ached for home. But now that she was here, it no longer felt like a home. Where did she belong? Queen of Er'Rets? Heir to Carm? An illegitimate daughter did not deserve either. She could stay here and serve Gypsum, ready her for her calling as duchess. But if Vrell refused to marry Achan, did that mean Gypsum would have to?
Vrell wept. She could not bear to witness such a thing.
She stared at the signet ring in her palm. The ruby stone shone in the sun. Achan had agreed to marry a stranger. It might not have been his plan, but he had not fought it. Barely a week had passed since his declarations in Mitspah. He had given her up much more easily that even she expected. Was it because he was respectful of her choice to be apart from him or because he did not care?
Mother had said he still cared about Vrell Sparrow.
She should confess the truth and accept his proposal. But the proposal was breeched now that her lineage was confirmed.
"Ahh!" Vrell screamed out her frustration and sank to her knees. Three birds fluttered out from their perch in the roof's rafters, startled by Vrell's cry. She watched them fly away, wishing she could fly too, like a real sparrow. Wishing she could start over fresh, honest.
She hugged her knees to her chest. True, she did not want to be queen. Such a life would be so difficult, so demanding. But what else could she be? She was a decent healer. Perhaps she could serve in the coming war, use the gifts Arman had given her to help Achan's cause.
A thought sprang up at the back of her mind. It seemed insane, wild, scary, and completely reckless.
She sought the face of Jax mi Katt and sent a knock.
Vrell! It's good to hear from you. How can I be of service?
Are you still in Carmine?
How did you know I was in-
Never mind. Could the Marad use another healer? A healer who is a woman?
A long silence. War is coming. We can always use healers. But you must be able to defend yourself. I cannot watch over you.
I do not need a nursemaid. When you are ready to ride south, I shall join you.
Vrell broke the connection. She would ride south, join the Marad rebels as the stray healer girl Vrell Sparrow, a name that now fit her in every way, since her father would not publicly claim her. She would serve her king.
But she would do it her way.
NOT THE END
Acknowledgments
Thanks to God for getting me through this last year. It has been an amazing journey. God is good to me, all the time.
Big thanks to Brad, Luke, and Kaitlyn for their patience and support.
Thanks to Jeff Gerke, a brilliant editor. He points out the best things, like magically appearing freckles and chairs. I have learned so much from him.
To the members of the Christian Young Adult Writers and Readers critique groups-Ann, Bridgett, Carman, Christopher, Crystal, Claire, Deb, Diana, Durga, Gretchen, Jacob, Kasey, Katie, Kathleen, Laura, Lynn, Maria, Mary H, Mary W, Nicole, Patrick, Shanti, Shelley, Stephanie, and Vernona-for your wisdom, support, prayers, and encouragement. You all are the best!
Thanks to my local readers: Philena English, Rachel Bentz, and Kylie Emery. I appreciate you taking the time to help me.
Laura Schuff, thank you! You are a brilliant young woman. What an amazing help you were.
Thanks to Cheryl Secomb and her friends JoAnna and Tamar for helping me with my Hebrew translations.
Hugs to all my readers. Thanks for reading about Achan and Vrell. One more book to go!
