Almost.
With Colin, she was experiencing every dream she had ever wanted from a man. All except one. To be truly desired. No matter how good Colin made her feel now, it would not match the pain of discovering that she was just a surrogate, a live manifestation of what he once had. At the altar, she had thought passion would be enough. And it might be, if he needed her and not a substitute for Deirdre.
The second his lips touched hers, Colin knew Makenna wanted him. Her response was too pure, too genuine. Full of longing and innocence, it was more intoxicating than the strongest of ales. If she knew the intensity of his desire to touch and intimately know every inch of her body, she would be terrified. He forced himself to slow down and keep the kiss gentle, exploring the softness of her lips.
He inhaled her sweet scent of wildflowers. Never would he be able to ride through the fields again without thinking of her. He moved to deepen the kiss and immediately sensed a change. Makenna did not pull away, but a tautness filled her that wasn’t there before.
Instantly Colin withdrew. Deirdre had never responded to his kisses the way Makenna had last night. Deirdre had pretended to enjoy them, but deep down he had always known it was toleration—not pleasure—she endured in his arms. Had he needed it to be different with Makenna so badly that he imagined her response?
Colin cupped Makenna’s face and peered into green eyes swirling with doubt and emotion. His fears were immediately assuaged. Despite all their arguments and clashes over her unusual inclinations, he understood her and why she retreated. She was afraid—not of what he might do—but what he thought her to be. She feared being compared.
Colin closed his eyes but didn’t let her go. His new bride had no way of knowing that whenever he touched her, spoke with her, kissed her, the last thing he thought of was his dead wife. It would be impossible to mistake the wild passionate creature in his arms for Deirdre.
Makenna watched him close his eyes and hoped in silence that he would release her and let her leave, but seconds later his deep blue eyes reopened and looked at her. He was not remembering his past. Colin was completely in the present, and his sole thoughts were about her. His gaze conveyed such glittering need Makenna felt herself tremble just before he leaned down and recaptured her lips with so much tenderness it seared her senses. She heard a moan escape, and knew it was her own body betraying her. Unable to fight the passionate assault any longer, her fingers clenched his shoulders as she leaned into him, kissing him with a hunger that belied her fears.
Colin felt a calm invade the deep place that had grown tense with apprehension. No longer was Makenna fighting their connection, their physical attraction. She wanted him, and she was admitting it with her actions.
His lips trailed a line of kisses to her ear and whispered, “I will never hurt you, Makenna, but I won’t deny that I want you. Very much. And I believe you want me, too.”
Before she could respond, Colin pulled her body fully against his and kissed her mouth hungrily, thrusting his tongue deep into her velvet warmth. An elemental, dangerous sexual desire was building within him. Never before had his physical need for a woman been so raw and powerful. His power to control it was fading rapidly.
Makenna moaned as he crushed her lips beneath his. The full force of his own hunger broke over her. She returned the kiss with sweet fervor. The inexplicable need to touch him, taste him everywhere was growing to irrepressible levels.
Their first kiss by the loch revealed a need and a connection neither had realized existed. Tonight’s initial embrace had been one of gentle persuasion and soft exploration. This, however, was completely different.
It was two souls, full of feverish desire, which had been deprived of fulfillment for far too long. The result was more intoxicating, more demanding, and far more blatantly erotic.
A sense of urgency was growing beyond her understanding. Passion once buried deep inside her now roared wild and hot through her veins. Makenna instinctively pressed herself against Colin, seeking release from the unknown tension suffusing her body.
Colin was burning with desire. Makenna’s unconstrained response ignited a fire within him that had been dormant too long. He was so hard he hurt, and his imagination was going wild, thinking of all the things he’d like to do to her. When she moved closer, he held her, letting her feel the long, hard length of his arousal.
Immediately Makenna became aware of Colin’s physical need. She learned enough about mating from her sisters, but never did she dream a man could be so very hard, nor so large. The rigidity of his body completely contrasted the featherlight caresses of his fingers igniting a liquid fire in her veins. She waited for fear to rise and compel her to end the spell he was casting, but it never came. Instead, more than anything, she wanted to be with him, touch him, and know him in every way imaginable.
Makenna’s small sighs and light shivers made Colin momentarily lose his composure. A considerable shudder of need racked him as a raging hunger challenged his defenses. He knew his size and strength frightened women. It had terrified Deirdre. He wouldn’t, he vowed silently to himself, lose control and frighten his virgin wife away.
He released her lips and plucked the combs from her hair. Burying his face in the loose red curls, he reveled in the thick silky mass finally free of its constraints. His lips paused to nibble on the soft crevices of her neck before trailing to the base of her throat and below. His hand curved around her spine where the low back of her gown offered access to her silken skin. Slowly he unthreaded the ties to the bliaut until it gave way and slid onto the floor.
“So soft, so sweet.” He heard himself moan his thoughts aloud. “God, I need you, Makenna. I want you like I’ve wanted no other woman,” he purred against her ear.
Her mouth finally free, Makenna asked, “Colin, what’s happening? I don’t know what’s wrong with me. My body feels to be on fire, and yet I crave more.”
Colin cupped her cheek, his control almost shattered by her innocently whispered words. “Nothing’s wrong. Nothing has ever been more right. God, Makenna, don’t leave me. Please don’t tell me to go,” he begged, uttering his fears aloud.
His eyes met hers, and Makenna knew she never would. “Not now, not ever.”
The simple vow was heartfelt and real. Makenna meant every word. And suddenly his future seemed a lot less lonely. This strong-willed woman would no doubt argue and fight with him to their graves, but she wouldn’t ignore him. With Makenna, he would never be alone again.
The knowledge released a surge of need Colin could no longer suppress. He yanked impatiently at his clothing and then, before she became aware of his nude state, he pulled her back into his embrace and drank hungrily from her lips.
Makenna clutched at him, savoring the feel of his warm skin against her palms. Each kiss was deeper and more stirring than the last. She was barely aware of Colin removing the last of her clothing.
Last night seeing her naked from a distance, Colin had been tortured to know what it would be like to feel such wild beauty in his arms. Now that he was actually touching her, she was even more magnificent than he had imagined.
Unable to wait any longer, Colin scooped Makenna up in his arms and carried her to the bed. Settling her against the pillows, he lowered himself until he covered her body with his own.
“Makenna.” He paused, waiting until her eyes focused on his. “Never wonder whom I am thinking of when we are together. For it will always be you. I know who I am with, and I make love to you because I want and desire you, not merely because you are my wife and I can. Trust me. Coupling is only fulfilling if each of us crave the other. If you tell me you do not want this, I will cease and let you return to your room. No one will be the wiser.”