“Maybe.” Lily drew in a ragged breath, but didn’t move away. She moved closer to him, and Nikoli groaned. He’d been fantasizing about her lips all day. Just the thought of actually kissing her nearly sent him over the edge right then.
He lowered his head to hers, his nose brushing hers. She didn’t flinch. She went completely still, but she didn’t flinch. He heard her gasp, the soft intake of breath. His eyes looked into hers. He saw the desire. Saw the fear, but mostly he saw trust. She trusted him not to force her to do anything she couldn’t do. She trusted him not to become angry if she couldn’t do it.
That, more than anything else, made Lily Holmes the most dangerous creature he’d ever encountered. She could break him, and he didn’t care.
His breath feathered across her lips. He waited. She still hadn’t moved, but he could see her fingers tearing at each other. She was scared and nervous. He’d go slowly if it killed him. And it just might. “Are you good, Milaya?”
“Yes,” she whispered. He could smell the peppermint on her breath.
“Good girl,” he said and started to move closer, to close the tiny gap between their lips…
“Lily!” The pounding on the door started seconds after the bellow. Nikoli groaned.
“Ignore it,” he pleaded, even as Lily started to move away.
“I can’t.” She sounded just as frustrated as he did, but she got up and answered the door.
Nikoli sighed and let himself fall backward on her bed. So close. So damn close. He wasn’t sure if she’d let him try again. She’d been so nervous to begin with, she might have seen the door as the proverbial bell that saved her. Not kissing her might even set them back in their progress, dammit. She’d get all nervous and start having doubts. He had to keep her in the now, not let her past haunt her.
The two girls at Lily’s door kept peeking around her to catch a glimpse of him, and an idea started to form. A grin slid across his face. She wasn’t going to remember her own fears. Nope, she was going to remember laughter instead. He sat up and pulled his shirt off. The girls’ eyes widened, and one of them stammered. Lily turned her head toward him when the girl in question didn’t answer for the third time. Lily’s own eyes went round. She glanced from him to the girls, her face flaming. Nikoli chuckled. Well, he’d laugh, anyway. She might go to bed screaming in rage.
He watched as she hurried the girls up and then shut her door, before turning to face him. She stayed where she was, but that was okay with him. He loved watching her reactions.
“What do you think you’re doing?” she demanded after a minute.
“Doing?” he asked innocently.
“Put your shirt back on!” She did the whisper shout thing, which only caused him to laugh.
“I don’t want to,” he told her and then grinned. Her eyes widened. She knew his I’m-up-to-no-good grin. He bounced the bed.
Lily’s mouth dropped open in a silent O. He bounced it again, the mattress squeaking.
“Stop that!” She ran over to stand in front of him. “I mean it, Nikoli, stop it right now. You know they’re out there listening.”
“Make me.” He started to bounce the bed again, harder, forcing the old mattress to groan in protest. Lily looked mortified, and when he groaned loudly, using his hand to knock the headboard against the wall, he thought she might faint.
“This isn’t funny!” she seethed. “People are listening!”
He knew that. He’d heard the footsteps and the whispering too. He chuckled and bounced the bed faster and harder, his hand forcing the headboard to hit the wall repeatedly. He let out another long, deep moan and said, “Lily…”
She grabbed him and hauled him off the bed, falling with him. He turned mid-fall so his back hit the floor, and she landed on top of him. Her leg landed between his, and it took every ounce of control he had not to hiss. He was hard, and the simple touch actually hurt.
Lily stared nonplussed at him, and Nikoli bit back a groan. She moved and rubbed along his length. “Lily, if you move, I won’t guarantee you’ll walk away unscathed.”
“I…” She shifted, trying to push away from him, and her knee pressed in on him. It was too much. He rolled, keeping her safe until the last minute. She hit the floor and he caged her, careful not to touch her. “I told you not to move,” he bit out.
She took a shaky breath, and he could see the panic starting to rise up in her eyes. “Am I touching you, Lily Bells?” he asked. She shook her head. “Then don’t panic. I’m not going to touch you.”
“Then will you move so I can get up?” she asked, her voice panicked. “Please, Nikoli…I can’t…this…” She started to stutter in her panic.
“No,” he said. He saw how afraid she was, but she had to trust him. “I like you caged in, trapped. We’ve already established earlier today how happy it makes me.”
“You’re perverse,” she stammered, a smile tugging at her lips, despite her unease. He let out a small sigh. She was almost to her breaking point. He could see it in her eyes, feel it in the tenseness of her body.
“I just like making you blush,” he told her. “I can’t wait to see where your blush starts so I can follow it all the way up, tasting every inch of you as I go.”
She took a ragged breath, her eyes wide and panicked. He bent his head and let his nose rub alongside hers for a moment before pulling back.
“You always say you’re not going to touch me and then you do,” she accused.
“But you like it when I do that, don’t you, Milaya?”
“Yes,” she answered honestly, and Nikoli wanted to fist pump at the small victory. Until he looked into her eyes. Weariness tinged them, and Nikoli became concerned. She’d been through a lot the last few days. As badly as he wanted to kiss her, he couldn’t push her any more tonight.
He pushed himself up and off her. Lily scrambled back faster than he would have liked, but at least she didn’t move more than a foot away from him. Last night she’d have been on the other side of the room. Progress was progress.
“What time is your first class tomorrow?” he asked, picking his shirt up off the floor.
“Nine.”
He tugged it over his head. “I’ll swing by and pick you up for breakfast then. There’s this little dive I know about ten minutes from campus that serves the absolute best breakfast. Even your frou-frou stuff.”
“Frou-frou stuff?” she asked, a laugh escaping.
“Don’t think I didn’t see you giving Mike all those disgusting looks this morning.” He winked. “They serve a lighter breakfast for all the health nuts along with my steak and eggs.”
Her nose scrunched up, and he found it adorable. He wanted to slap himself for finding it adorable, but there it was.
“Do they have fresh fruit?” She inched closer to him.
“Barney gets a fresh delivery every morning just for his fruit crepes.” Nikoli said, keeping still. He wanted to see what she’d do.
“How many restaurant owners do you know?” Lily moved to within a few inches of him.
“Enough to keep you supplied in good food until we graduate.”
Nikoli held his breath as Lily stared, her expression terrified, but determined.
“Promise not to move,” she whispered.
“Scout’s honor,” he said.
She smiled and shook her head. “Put your hand out, palm up.”
Nikoli did as she asked and simply waited. She placed her hand on top of his. Barely. He felt her fingertips mostly, but it was something he didn’t think she could do, at least not yet.
“Your hand looks massive next to mine,” she murmured. She flattened her hand out and let it sit there on his. He felt it sizzle through every nerve ending in his body like a white hot branding iron. He wanted to pull her close, to kiss her, to tell her how proud he was of her, but he did none of those things. He held himself perfectly still until she pulled her hand away.
“You did good, Lily Bells,” he told her. “Very good.”
“I didn’t know if I could,” she said, her voice low and soft. “Thank you, Nikoli.”