Step by step he was headed into nowhere. He thought about his father’s kindly voice and the way Debara’s milk had tasted as she stroked him with her soft pink tongue. He thought about Debara’s daughter Penzi, and how he used to lie beside her under the shade of the acacias to watch the clouds float by. Penzi was his betrothed, and she had been aching for her first kill so she could be a true lioness and unite with him. “Dear, gentle Penzi,” he stammered, “I’ll never see you again.” He was without hope, and with a deep pain in his gut he fell to the ground and sobbed. She was afraid of exile, too terrified to accompany him. He did not blame her, but he felt the lonliness gnawing at his ribs and a moan escaped him.
“Help me, Aiheu! Help me! Send me a friend, God! I’ll be good! Please, God! Oh Aiheu! I’ll never be so selfish again!”
CHAPTER: THE SUNSET OF TAKA
The last few days of Elanna’s marriage to Taka went by in a blur. Taka had more frequent nightmares, sometimes three or four a night, and the lack of sleep left him looking prematurely old. Sometimes she would find him huddled in the cave whimpering. She would ask him what was wrong and he would say, “My mother really loved me, you know. I wish she were here right now.”
She would answer him, “I’m here, and I really love you.” He would kiss her and nuzzle her desperately. His temper was very short, and he snapped at her from time to time, but afterwards he always came to her sobbing and begging her for forgiveness almost incoherently. She would hug him tightly and move him gently with her arms from side to side like a crying cub.
Taka insisted that others eat a bit of his food before he would touch it, sure that the hyena healers would try to drug or poison him. He was afraid of sleep for more than just his nightmares. He finally got to the point where he was afraid to sleep if Elanna was asleep. So the two of them spent less time together--she mainly saw him asleep, and she collapsed from exhaustion shortly after he awoke and was tired all the time. Finally Uzuri, in her kindness, offered to stand watch over them part of the day so they could sleep touching and maybe spend some wakeful moments together.
Then one evening right at the end of his life he went out on the promontory and looked up at the clouds that passed overhead but did no good. In the grip of his encroaching madness, he shouted, “Have you forgotten how to rain??” He turned about, lifted his tail and urinated, the golden drops falling on the ground below. Elanna thanked God that the others were out on the hunt at the time.
He came trudging in and looked down at Elanna who lay on the floor of the cave. “What’s the matter, Honey Tree? You never saw someone take a whiz off the rock before?”
She did not answer him, but patted next to her with her paw. He came and lay beside her, sighed, and closed his eyes. He tired easily, and it did not take long for him to fall asleep.
A moment passed, then he opened his eyes. Something was wrong--very wrong. He looked around, surprised that he couldn’t find his love. “Odd,” he thought. “She hadn’t left me in my sleep in a long time.” He called out her name but heard nothing in return except a quiet laugh, a hyena’s laugh. His stomach began to knot up, and nearing panic he rushed out onto the stone ledge toward the mocking sound. He looks around expecting to see his mate. Instead he saw Shenzi.
Slowly and carefully, he approached her. Shenzi regarded him with an amused grin. “What do YOU want?”
“Have you seen Lannie?”
She only laughed demonically.
“How DARE you laugh at me! How DARE you! I remember when you were a little brat messing in your own den!”
Shenzi laughed louder, a red fire glowing in her eyes. “Now I’m messing in YOUR den! Who is the scavenger now??”
Taka begins to quail with fear. “Where is Lannie??”
“What’s a matter, cubby?? Can’t hold on to your Mommy??” She approached him, hackles raised. “Maybe she wants to crouch with a REAL lion? Maybe that warped little body of yours makes her sick! Sick, sick, SICK!”
“If that’s how you feel, take your--people--and get out!!”
“It’s not that easy, cubby! You don’t scare me one bit.” Shenzi grinned broadly. Taka gasped in horror as he saw the signs of fresh blood on her strong, sharp teeth.
“Where is Lannie?? What have you done with her??”
“Wouldn’t you like to know!”
“What have you done??” Taka demanded, shoving her back with a paw. “WHAT HAVE YOU DONE??” He moved closer as she backed back, still laughing at him. “Stop laughing and answer me! WHAT HAVE YOU DONE??”
He shoved her with a paw again and she tumbled backwards over the edge of the promontory, falling, falling, falling to the distant savanna.
“Shenzi!!”
Taka quickly made his way down the steep sides of Pride Rock. Maybe in her dying breaths she might reveal the truth. He searched under the promontory, expecting to see her twisted body. Instead he spotted a lioness laying in the grass motionless.
He approached the form slowly with a growing panic. The pain in his stomach was almost unbearable as he crept the last few lengths on trembling limbs and looked at the face of the lioness.
“LANNIE!! OH GODS!!”
There were fresh claw wounds on her otherwise flawless form. “NO!!” LANNIE!! NO!!”
Suddenly he was stirred from sleep by a familiar presence. He gasped and tried to catch his breath as Elanna’s dear face approached his and kissed him.
“Dear...dear...you were having another bad dream. You screamed out my name.”
“Oh Lannie, never leave me!” He kissed her face and rubbed his paws against her. “Never leave me, girl! Never leave me!”
“I won’t, honey tree!”
He continued to kiss her. “I love you, honey tree! You don’t think I’m a warped little lion, do you?”
“No! You poor fool!” She rubbed against him softly, returning the affection. “I’ve felt that strong body next to me in the night every night and rubbed your beautiful dark mane. I’ve made love with you every time you came to me with that sweet little hungry cub look. You scare me when you talk like that--like you don’t trust me. Taka, you’re the only one in the world that trusts me anymore. If you don’t trust me, what will I do?? What will I do??”
Taka put his forepaws about her neck and rubbed his face against hers, his breath finally returning to normal as calm returns to his body. “I will always trust you. You are the only real truth I’ve ever known.”
“My poor foolish husband!” She kissed him. “At least this cave is our gentle place. If only I could stop those nightmares, my darling. If I could take them on myself....”
“NEVER say that! NEVER!” He kissed her desperately.
“But I would. I would.”
“I know you would. And don’t think I don’t appreciate it.”
CHAPTER: THE BLUEBIRDS OF HAPPINESS
The rogue lion wandered the corridors between territories. There he was relatively safe from the territorial males. They would remind him to avoid their lands, but not fight him. Some of the kinder ones who remembered what it was like to be alone would chat for a while when they saw he meant no harm. Ugas would share a couple of jokes. Old Mabatu would even stroke his mane and give him a blessing. Once, Duma let him eat a small portion of zebra haunch because he reminded him of his son.