CHAPTER: SOMEONE TO LEAN ON
The day’s event had taken their toll on the two lions, and when the sun had slipped below the horizon, they quietly searched for a clearing which to bed for the night. Upon finding one, Elanna lied down in the short grass and Kubali did the same, a few passes away. Kubali, long accustomed to the solitude, fell asleep rather quickly. Elanna wasn’t so lucky. As he mind filled with visions of her Taka, she softly wept.
Kubali’s ears were pricked on this weeping. Looking over at her for a few moments, he rose up and moved towards her. Hearing no protest on her part, he lied down next to her, still keeping a small gap between their bodies. Almost absentmindedly, Elanna turned and draped a paw over him, which brought forth a soft purr from him. Felling his warmth, they finally drifted off to a quiet sleep together.
Morning came quickly for the pair. Elanna woke first, and while she was thinking of her Taka and how nice it was to see him wake in the morning, her paw wandered on him. She softly stroked his mane, as she once did for the fallen king.
Suddenly, she realized she wasn’t at Pride Rock anymore. She turned her head to see her paw across Kubali’s mane.
"I'm sorry!"
"Don't be. My nurse used to do that." He sighed. "I bet he was special, this mate of yours."
"He's dead."
"Oh...." He touched her face again. "That's why you were crying
last night. I haven’t known you that long, but I already hate it when you cry."
Elanna pawed his shoulder gently. “Look, Kube...Kublia...uh...”
“Kubali.”
“Yeah. You’ve been very sweet to me, but I don’t want you to get any unrealistic expectations. I need a friend now, and I think you could be that friend. But I don’t know if I could ever fall in love again.”
Kubali smiled gently and touched her nose with his. “I need a friend too. Someone I can lean on when the trail is long and weary. I wouldn’t take a chance of ruining this.”
Elanna smiled, relieved, and returned his nuzzle.
Over the next three days Elanna and Kubali worked hard to prove their friendship would never blossom into romance. It was a tense time for both of them, a time of guarded words and cautiously touching only when necessary. They would allow themselves a good morning nuzzle and, when they made a small kill, a congratulatory pat on the shoulder. Still, it was done timidly and with great restraint.
Then on the fourth day a remarkable thing happened. They stopped being afraid and decided to enjoy their friendship.
Elanna was sunning herself on a small kopje that morning when Kubali came and laid beside her. “Lannie, we have to talk.”
“My husband called me Lannie,” she replied. “It makes me feel uncomfortable to hear it from anyone else.”
“Fine. Lots of things make me feel uncomfortable. I think we’re both pretty miserable.”
“Are you saying we should part?”
“No. I’m saying we should stop being miserable.” Kubali said, “I’ve been holding back from you. Surely you wonder about my past.”
“I try not to.”
“See there--that’s what I mean. This secrecy is tearing us apart. I mean, if we’re really friends, let’s be honest with each other.”
“Are you saying I’ve lied to you?”
“No. You have to say something first.” Kubali looked around with building frustration. “Look, I have a sordid past. If I can tell you what I did to wind up here, you can tell me, can’t you?”
Elanna looked about, surprised. “Just how sordid?”
“Then we have a deal?”
“It depends,” Elanna said, rolling over to look at him in the eyes.
Kubali sighed nervously. “Where shall I begin? Well, I think it started when I was a little cub. My mother died the day I was born, and I was raised by nurses. My dad is a king, you know. I was the heir apparent, and I guess I had free rein to do what I pleased.” He laughed nervously. “Oh yes, it pleased me to do a lot of selfish things--a whole lot! The lionesses got fed up with me and one day they said my polite little brother would make a better king--or else.”
“Or else?”
“Or else they would leave. Dad banished me.” Tears came to his eyes. “I’ll never forget the look on his face when he said good bye. It will haunt me for the rest of my life.”
“Poor Kubali!”
“I deserved it, though. I really messed up my own life, and I have no one else to blame. Now I have to make a new life for myself, and I’ll be different. I begged Aiheu for a friend. Someone--anyone--that would end my awful loneliness. I swore I’d be better. I meant it too. Then I saw this feisty lioness facing off a whole group of hyenas. I knew that you were the answer to my prayers.”
Elanna kissed away his tears, a rather intimate gesture of friendship. “Your honesty puts me to shame. Really, I should have told you more about myself. You’ve been so kind to me.”
“Am I kind? I wondered if I was doing well.”
“Better than well, my friend.” She nuzzled him. “My husband was a king. His name was Taka. He was never popular, but I loved him. I loved him the way snow loves the mountain peaks, and you know the snow would never leave the mountain peaks lest it should melt and die.”
“What did he do to be so unpopular?”
“Well he....” She sighed. “He was not completely sane. He did a lot of strange things. Very strange. But it was not his fault. I did not know that he had killed his brother to take the throne. Not till after the hyenas ripped him alive.”
“Whoa, you poor dear!”
“I loved him, but I wouldn’t have stayed with him. Not if I’d known. Still the knowledge has not killed my love. Somehow I cannot turn years of love into hate. Now you know why I have not fallen in love with you. When he died, my dreams of love also died. He was killed and I live in exile, a wanderer with no place to lay my head.”
“Wrong. Lay your head on my mane, dear. It doesn’t matter if you love me or not. I have enough love for both of us.”
She laid her head on the soft fur of his mane and sighed peacefully. “I’m glad we had this talk. And I didn’t mean what I said before--call me Lannie. You’ve earned the right.”
“It’s not a right, it’s a privilege. A privilege to be earned daily. Your suffering is over, Lannie. Over and done.” He stroked her gently with his paw.
CHAPTER: HAVE IT YOUR WAY
If calling Elanna ‘Lannie’ was a privilege to be earned daily, Kubali did his best. The truth had freed them to enjoy each other’s acceptance. Elanna became to Kubali more than just a mystery, however alluring. She became a person with strengths and weaknesses, and compassion like a river bearing away his sorrows to lands unseen. In return, Kubali treated Elanna with a gentle humility he didn’t know he had. He devoted himself to making her feel important and cared for.
With each passing day, Kubali and Elanna drew closer to the inevitable moment when one or the other would use the word “love” to describe their feelings.
With all the truth and experience, however, small quirks showed up in their behavior. Elanna found Kubali’s snoring intolerable when he lay on his back. Often in the night she would shove him over with a paw, hoping to find peace. And Kubali noticed to his irritation that she always deferred decisions to him. It was nothing much really, just a ‘You decide’ or a ‘We can do what you want’ every so often, but it bothered him. And for him, this was one problem that a simple shove of the paws would not rectify. He decided to let it past and wait. She get use to the freedoms, he thought to himself.