"Tomas, got a minute?"
I didn't think he heard me over the music, which the DJ kept painfully loud, but he nodded. I wasn't supposed to be there yet, so he knew something was up. We carved a path through the crowd, which earned me a dirty look from a woman with purple dreads and black lipstick for stealing off with the main attraction. Or maybe it was my happy-face T-shirt and earrings she didn't like. I usually did the Goth thing, or as close as I could get without looking truly awful—strawberry blondes don't wear black well—but that was when I was working. I found out pretty early that no one takes a fortune-teller seriously if she shows up in pastels. But on my days off I reserved the right not to look like I was going to a funeral. My life is depressing enough without help.
We ducked behind the bar to the back room. It was quieter there, which meant we could hear each other if we stood close and shouted, but the noise was less of a problem than looking into Tomas' face and figuring out what to say. Like me, he'd been on the street early. Unlike me, he'd had nothing to trade but himself. I didn't like the look that came into his eyes whenever I asked about his past, so I normally avoided it, but it was probably a variation on the usual theme. Most street kids have the same story to tell, revolving around being used, abused and thrown out with the trash. I'd thought I was doing him a favor, letting him stay in my spare room and getting him a real job for a change, but a share in Tony's wrath was a high price to pay for six months of stability.
Our relationship was not close enough to help me figure out how to keep Tomas safe without looking like I was bailing on him. Part of the problem was that neither of us liked opening up, and it didn't help that we'd gotten off to a rough start. I came out of the bathroom the night he moved in to find him lounging nude on my bed, his hair spread out like an ink blot against my white sheets. I'd stood there, clutching my Winnie the Pooh towel and gaping at him, while he stretched like a big cat on my feather comforter, all sleek muscles and boneless grace. He was completely unself-conscious and I could see why; he sure didn't look like a starved street kid. I'd never asked his age, but assumed he was younger than me. Which made him way too young to have that particular look in his eye.
I hadn't been able to keep from following the path of one long-fingered hand as he traced a line down the side of his body from nipples to groin. It was a blatant invitation, and it took me a second to stop drooling and realize what was going on. I finally figured out that he thought he was supposed to pay for his room in what he considered the usual way. On the streets, there's no such thing as free, so when I refused to take money, he assumed I wanted payment of another kind. I should have tried to explain, to tell him that my whole life had been about being used and that I sure as hell wasn't going to do it to someone else. Maybe if I had, we'd have started to talk and cleared up a few things. Unfortunately, what I did instead was to freak and toss him out of the bedroom, along with the blanket that I'd quickly thrown over him. I don't know what he thought about it all, since we never discussed that night. We eventually fell into a more or less relaxed routine, splitting the housework, cooking and shopping like any two roommates, but both of us guarded our secrets. I'd catch him watching me with a strange expression sometimes, and I figured he was waiting for me to abandon him like everyone else. I really hated it that I was about to do exactly that.
"Did you get off early?" He touched my cheek and I stepped back, wanting to be farther from those trusting eyes. There was no escaping what I had to do, but I wasn't looking forward to seeing his face shut down, and watching whatever faith he'd regained in people bleed away because of me.
"No." I shifted feet and tried to think how not to make this sound like a rejection. It wasn't his fault that my life was spiraling down the toilet. Again. "I have to tell you something important, and you need to listen and do what I ask, okay?"
"You're going." I don't know how he knew. Maybe I had that look. He'd probably seen it before.
"I don't have a choice." By mutual consent, we moved out the back door to the paved surface surrounding the stairs to street level. Not much of a view, but at least it was quieter. The air smelled of rain, but the downpour that had been building all afternoon was holding off. If I hurried, maybe I could make the bus station before getting soaked. "You know how I told you that I had some bad things happen a while ago?"
"Yes, but there is nothing to worry about now. I'm here." He smiled, and I didn't like the look in his eyes. I didn't want him fond of me, didn't want him to miss me. Damn, this wasn't going well. I decided to quit trying for subtlety; it wasn't my strong suit.
"There's some serious stuff going down soon, and I have to be gone before it hits the fan." It wasn't much of an explanation, but how do you tell someone that the vampire gangster who raised you and who you tried your best to destroy has put a price on your head? There was no way Tomas could understand the world I came from, not if I had all the time in the world to explain. "You can have the stuff in the apartment, but take my clothes to the shelter. Lisa will put them to good use." I had a momentary pang for my carefully assembled wardrobe, but it couldn't be helped.
"Cass…"
"I'll talk to Mike before I go. I'm sure he'll let you bunk here for a week or two, in case anyone drops by the apartment looking for me. It probably wouldn't be good for you to go back there for a while." There was a studio apartment at the top of the building left over from the era when owners sometimes lived over their businesses. Mike had used it fairly recently, so it should be in decent shape. And I would definitely feel better knowing Tomas was staying there. I didn't like the idea of a bunch of enraged vamps descending on our place looking for me and finding him instead.
"Cassie." Tomas took my hand gingerly, as if afraid I might snatch it away. He thought I was uptight about being touched since that initial misunderstanding. I'd never corrected him because I didn't want to give the wrong impression and, frankly, it was easier to behave myself if I kept a little distance between us. He didn't need to be hit on at home as well as at work. "I'm coming with you." He said it calmly, as if it was the most logical thing in the world.
I didn't want to hurt him, but I could not stand there and argue the point with an assassin after me. "You can't. I'm sorry, but two people are easier to find than one, and besides, if I'm caught…" I stopped because I couldn't think how to tell him how bad it would be and not sound like a raving lunatic. Of course, he'd probably seen enough weird things on the streets to make him more open-minded than the cops, who treated anyone who started talking about vampires as a druggie or a psychotic. But even if I could figure out a way to tell him, there wasn't time.
"I'm sorry; I have to go." That wasn't how I wanted to say good-bye. There were a lot of things I hadn't told Tomas because I was afraid it would sound like I was coming on to him. And now, when I could say whatever I wanted, I had to leave.
I started to pull away, but he held on to my hand and his grip was surprisingly strong. Before I could insist that he let me go, I had a very familiar, totally unwelcome feeling creep over me. The muggy night air was suddenly replaced by something colder, darker and far less friendly. I don't know what nonsensitives feel around vampires, but all my life I've been able to tell when they're near. It's like when people say that someone walks over their grave—kind of a shiver down the spine combined with a feeling of something being wrong. I never feel that way around ghosts like norms sometimes do, but it hits me with vamps every time. I looked up to see a dark shape silhouetted against the glare of the streetlights for an instant, before it melted into the night and was gone.