It had been two weeks since their first date and she still wasn’t sure why she kept saying yes when all she wanted was to die a lonely death wallowing in her own desolation. Maybe it was because Vi refused to let her or the fact that every time he asked, her mouth automatically said yes, like if she said it often enough, eventually her heart would notice that, hey, there’s a really sweet, good looking guy over here who deserves a chance. It made her the worst person in the world, but her brain had already decided that she needed to move on and let go. Her heart was a whole other matter. It was still adamant that it wanted Killian and only Killian and no one else would ever do. The two refused to see eye to eye on anything and Randy was taking the hits. But she figured if she forced herself to take more notice and open up to the possibility, then maybe, eventually, the pain would fade. That hadn’t happened yet.
Dimples winked from a smile made for toothpaste commercials. “Great! I’ll pick you up at six.”
“Why don’t I meet you at my place?” she suggested. “That way I can change.”
Randy nodded. “Okay, but I can drop you off so you don’t have to grab the bus.”
His kindness made her hate herself a little more.
“It’s okay. I like the bus. Besides, you’ll still be working when I get off.”
Randy was a masseur in the hotel spa. She’d never seen him before the day he walked up to her counter and asked for her number. The sheer size of him, those dimples, and the unexpected approach had bulked her into complying.
He relented. “Okay, well, then I’ll pick you up at seven.”
Juliette agreed and watched as he ambled away.
I can do this! She willed herself to believe. Honestly, how hard was it to find someone else? People did it all the time. They broke up, ate chocolate, and moved on to someone new. It wasn’t even as though she and Killian had been dating. It had only been sex, for God sakes. Letting go should not be that hard, and yet, five months later, she was still unable to do so, even with a guy who was as amazing and sweet and safe as Randy. There was something wrong with her, clearly. She had problems.
“You have problems!” Vi smacked the dishcloth down on the island and stormed to the fridge. “You’re insane and I am no longer feeding your crazy.”
“Vi, please!” Juliette begged. “If I have to listen to one more awkward silence, I will kill myself.”
“But go on your date?” the girl cried, whirling around. “Do you have any idea how weird that is? God, Jewels, he’s going to think we’re some kinky sister love package.”
“Oh ew!” Juliette flinched. “That’s disgusting.”
“Then don’t invite me to your date!”
Groaning, Juliette dropped into a stool at the island and dropped her face into her folded arms. “I don’t know what to say to him when we’re together,” she mumbled. She lifted her face and peered imploringly at her sister. “He keeps asking me things.”
The look Vi shot her was one of profound disgust. “Yeah, because you’re dating!” She threw up her hands. “Why are you if you can’t even stand to have a conversation with him?”
“It’s not that I can’t stand to talk to him,” Juliette argued. “It’s because I don’t…”
“What?” Vi demanded when she trailed off.
Juliette sighed. “Because I don’t want to talk to him. I mean I do. He’s such a great guy and—”
“And he really likes you,” Vi chimed in, being no help at all.
“But I don’t feel anything,” Juliette whispered. “When he takes my hand or when he kisses me—”
Vi raised a brow. “You mean that very awkward peck on the cheek that nearly sent you out of your skin? Okay, fine, sorry. Not helping. Go on,” she mumbled when Juliette shot her a frown.
“I keep hoping something will just spark and I’m getting nothing.”
“Then clearly you need to say goodbye and find someone else,” Vi said sagely.
“What if no one else wants me?” Juliette cringed at the pathetic note in her voice. “What if Killian…” Just saying his name hurt. “What if he was the only one and—”
“You’re right.” Vi sighed. “Well, there’s only one thing to do now. We need to get you a cat.”
She pitched the dishrag at Vi’s face.
The girl caught it, grinning. “We’ll call him Ginger.”
“Will you shut up?” Juliette rose.
“And we’ll get him a little bell on his little collar,” Vi went on relentlessly. “Then, we’ll get him a girlfriend and call her Whiskers. Then Ginger and Whiskers can have little baby kittens and—”
“I hate you.” She stumbled out of the room with Vi’s story of Juliette’s future following her to the stairs. “You’re still coming with me tonight!” she called over her shoulder.
“Can Daisy and Mr. Pickles come too?” Vi chased her down the hall. “You know how they hate being away from you. Plus they’ll want to meet their new daddy. Oh!” Clapping her hands, Vi skipped up the first step after Juliette. “We’ll get you one of those cat purses and you can take all your babies with you everywhere! Or a kitty stroller.”
“I will push you down the stairs, I swear to God.”
Vi’s cackling followed them all the way to the top.
Randy arrived promptly at seven in his Dodge Ram and clean, pressed jeans and black coat. His hair was still damp at the ends as though he’d left straight after his shower. The smell of soap and shaving cream wafted off him when he moved in to brush a kiss to Juliette’s cheek.
“Hi.”
Forcing her mouth to obey, Juliette smiled up at him. “Hey, you don’t mind if Vi tags along, do you? She had nothing to do and I felt bad leaving her alone.”
“No! Not at all. It’ll be great to get to really meet her.” He looked past her to Vi, who was taking an unnecessary long time to lock the front door. “Hey Vi, how are you?”
Pocketing her keys, Vi joined them at the bottom of the steps. “Good. I’m good. Excited, actually.”
Randy’s eyebrows went up with interest. “Yeah? What’s up?”
Vi’s arm snaked through Juliette’s. “Juliette has agreed to get a kitten.”
Juliette shoved her.
“She’s always wanted a kitten,” Vi went on, unfazed.
“I will cut you,” Juliette warned under her breath.
Vi simply grinned.
Randy peered from one to the other, genuinely baffled. “Oh, well, that’s great. I love cats.”
Vi elbowed Juliette. “Daddy!”
“Okay, can we go please?” Juliette marched towards the truck with the other two following behind her.
They drove to the movie theater in silence. In the backseat, Vi’s simmering disapproval coiled through the cabin, making the air bitterly uncomfortable. Juliette wondered if Randy could feel it too, but at a glance, he seemed only focused on the road. There was a calmness to his profile she envied. The sunlight toyed with the ends of his damp hair, making the rich strands shine. It highlighted the fine curves of his lashes to delicate gold. Juliette never understood the term Adonis like, but if she could picture anyone as the deity, it was Randy. He fit the persona, the Hercules body and Adonis’s face. Any girl would be lucky to have him.
The thought curdled something in her chest, turning what little happiness she still harbored into guilt and self-loathing. She was a bad person. There was no other explanation for it.
“Oh, I nearly forgot.” Randy pulled to a stop at a red light and turned his head to Juliette. “I won tickets today at work for that new botanical gardens that’s opening up this weekend.”
Juliette’s eyebrows lifted. “Wow! Really?”
He nodded. “I didn’t even know we had a contest going or anything, but my boss just walked up to me and said here, you won.”
“That’s so great!” Juliette said, meaning it. “I’ve been wanting to go since I heard about it.”