Any witty retort I might have made was rendered impossible by my complete lack of vocal cords. I couldn’t even look up and stick out my tongue at him, because my neck wouldn’t move. Coyote knew this and rubbed it in.
“Man, he didn’t put no ketchup on ya or nothin’, just ate ya raw and sweaty, no fries with that or a slice o’ pie afterward.”
Coyote’s boots shifted again, pointing northeast up the highway. “Hey, Mr. Druid, I know your dog is pretty big, but there’s a truck-size hound with red eyes coming at us. He’s six feet tall at the shoulder or I’m a horny toad. Ain’t no skinwalker can get itself a dog skin like that. You got any ideas? Friend or foe?”
I couldn’t see what he was talking about, of course. But if it wasn’t a skinwalker, it had to be something sent by Hel, and the only hound Hel knew was … Gods Below! I scrawled two words hastily in the dirt by Coyote’s boots. GARM. RUN!
“Run? Can’t I just shoot ’im?”
I kept circling the word RUN with my finger until he got the message. I heard the rifle and flashlight clatter to the ground behind me, and Coyote grunted as he picked me up off the ground and slung me over his shoulder in a fireman’s carry.
“You’re turnin’ out to be a giant pain in my ass, Mr. Druid.” A strained wheeze puffed out of me as the whiplash from flopping against his back reopened my delicate windpipe and sent searing needles of torture along the short highway from my throat to my brain. Coyote laughed about it. “Guess I’m a giant pain in your neck, huh?”
Chapter 11
Coyote took four steps before he shifted us somewhere significantly different. Not only did we shift from an arid plateau in winter to a lush riverbank in spring, we arrived in the daytime. Fat bumblebees lazily pollinated the flowering bushes as the river sang its song over partially submerged rocks. Birds serenaded us and the wind sighed gently of serenity and fulsomeness. Coyote answered the question I wanted to ask.
“We are in Third World, or Yellow World, on the banks of the Great Male River, near the dwellin’ place of White Shell Girl.” He set me down on the smooth, sandy bank much more gently than he had picked me up. “Oughtta be a good place for you to hide up and heal for a while.”
I wanted to shake my head, but of course I couldn’t. I couldn’t hold it up. But the power running through here was strong; this plane was bound tightly to the earth, and, had we the time, I could have enjoyed recuperating here. But it wasn’t a safe place. Nowhere was safe from Garm. Unlike Hel, he wasn’t bound to the nine realms of the World Tree. Supporting myself with one arm locked at the elbow, I scrawled another message in the sand of the riverbank.
Garm shifts planes.
Coyote read this and shrugged. “So what if he can? He don’t know where we are.”
I scowled and wrote furiously. He TRACKS!
“Aw, bull—” Coyote’s dismissal got cut off by the sound of an epic belly flop combined with a surprised howl. Water fooshed into the sky as something elephantine displaced much of the river’s flow.
“Son of a fucking bitch, Mr. Druid!”
Propped up as I was, I got my first look at the monstrosity pursuing us. It was Garm, Hel’s personal widdle doggie: black fur over a thickly muscled, stocky frame and a muzzle curled at the lips to show slavering teeth with disturbingly red gums. His eyes were glowing egg yolks, burning Scut Farkus eyes to make your kidneys cringe. He rose from the riverbed, which was only three feet deep, and shook himself, showering either bank and making his fur stand out in spiky clumps. Coyote was hoisting me back over his shoulder, and I thought briefly about trying to run on my own while holding my head up with my hands, but I was too weak from blood loss to make a go of it. Garm spotted us and rolled out such a deep, vibrating bark that I thought it might be the etymological origin of the term subwoofer. He launched himself toward us, the water hampering his movements, and Coyote was able to take four steps and shift us away before Garm could close the distance.
We arrived someplace where the ground was as blue as the sky. Startled by our sudden appearance, blue pheasants erupted out of the blue grass and shat blue shit.
“This is Blue World,” Coyote explained helpfully, but this time he continued to run away from the place where we’d shifted, and I had to concentrate on keeping my head attached and my fluids inside as I flopped over his back. “He’ll be along soon, so we gotta figure somethin’ out fast. Tap once for no, twice for yes, okay?”
I tapped his ass twice.
“Do you know how to kill it?” No. “Is this because o’ that Famine thing that giant spooky bitch pulled? He’ll keep comin’ until he eats you?” Yes. “She said it was scent-based, right?” Yes. “Do you smell the same when you shift to an animal form?” No. I thought he was going to suggest I shift to an animal and stay that way, which might have been effective in the short term, but that was only half his plan. “So how about I copy your form again, all the way down to your scent, you shift to an animal, and then I run back up to White World and let him think I’m you?”
That was brilliant and … brave. Unexpected. It deserved a compliment, but I had to content myself with a couple of taps for yes.
“Can you shift, all torn up like that?”
I could, but it risked tearing my tender tissues again. I’d lost a lot of blood and didn’t think I could afford to lose much more. I needed time I didn’t have. If I didn’t try it, though, there was no hope of shaking off Garm. I signaled yes, and as I did so, Hel’s wet and extremely hungry hound popped into view behind us, about fifty yards away. He barked at us triumphantly, the sound vibrating our bones. I figured we had about three seconds.
“All right, then,” Coyote said, “let’s do it afore I think about it too much.” He shifted us back up to Yellow World, and we were a little ways upriver from where we’d first arrived and fled. Coyote set me down near the bank and latched on to my arm.
“You hide out near here and I’ll be back tomorrow,” he said as he copied me. We had done the same thing earlier in the week to fool the thunder gods and the Norse; it worked despite my cold-iron aura, probably because he was targeting himself and he was beginning with skin-to-skin contact. Starting at his hand and rippling up from there, his rich brown skin turned pale and his clothes shifted to match mine. His neck sagged limply to the side, the same wound appearing, and it was disconcerting to see myself in such bad shape. On the plus side, Coyote couldn’t talk anymore. When the copy was complete, he let go of my arm and gave me a thumbs-up, then twirled his finger around to indicate I should get on with it. I triggered the charm on my necklace that bound my spirit to the shape of an otter, hoping that shrinking my size would keep my mended vessels and trachea in one piece. It worked, but I felt like the victim of a first-year acupuncture student, needles of pain shooting through my entire right side. Trapped in my shirt, I squeezed through the head hole and began to crawl weakly toward the river, as Coyote staggered to his feet and then actually stomped, barefoot, away from the riverbank. He was trying to blaze the clearest trail possible, leaving my scent behind to lead Garm away from the river when he made his inevitable appearance.
The waters of the Great Male River were somewhat swift and I figured the current would carry me a good distance downstream when I attempted to cross it, but that was not necessarily a bad thing, considering that Garm would shortly arrive behind me. Of greater concern was surviving the crossing. My neck wound was still open, though it was now otter-size, and submerging it in water as I tried to swim with a weakened system wasn’t the best idea I’d ever heard. If I passed out, I’d drown. If I didn’t try, Garm might gulp me down like a fun-size candy bar when he showed up.