“Because that’s not what’ll help you in the long run,” I said, remembering the conversation Bryce and I had the night before Thanksgiving. I’d been irritated when he kept pushing me to tell him what was running through my mind, but it turned out that was exactly what I needed to get a decent night of sleep. “I know you, Cody. You don’t lose your cool.”
“Everyone loses it sometime,” he deadpanned. “I’m not proud of what happened, but it’s been a long time coming.”
“Why? Explain it to me so we can try to help you,” I pleaded. “Bryce isn’t trying to find a reason to kick you out, he’s trying to help you figure out what needs to change so you don’t flip shit again.”
“It’s like this…” Cody started tugging at a loose thread on his shorts. “We’re all fucking lucky to be here. I know that. If we didn’t have this place, we’d probably wind up sick and in the hospital, if not worse. Some guys need to remember that instead of bitching about the lack of privacy. Fuck, I don’t like it any more than the rest of them, but I know better than to bitch about having a roof over my head, a bed to sleep in, and food in my stomach every night.”
“That makes sense,” I told him, hoping he’d keep talking because I felt as if we were finally getting somewhere. “So someone else was bitching, and that’s what made you go apeshit on him?”
“Part of it.” Cody wouldn’t look at me. His head hung low between his shoulders and I could see he was beating himself up over the earlier altercation.
“So what’s the rest?”
“I’m just tired,” Cody admitted. “Half the dudes in here don’t sleep for shit, and when they can’t sleep, it’s like they go out of their way to make sure no one can. I try to remember that this is better than sleeping on the streets, but sometimes I think about going back out there, even for a night. I’d found a lot of quiet places.”
Without thinking about it, I cuffed the back of his head. Cody flinched, and I felt like a pile of shit. He didn’t understand that not every touch was fueled by anger. “Sorry,” I apologized. “But I wouldn’t have done it if you weren’t being an idiot. It’s been below freezing every day this week. You really think you’d make it a night out there?”
“No,” Cody responded timidly. “Like I said, I’m tired. Beyond tired. I’m not thinking clearly.”
The guys could bitch at me later, but I was taking matters into my own hands. I couldn’t help everyone, but I could help Cody. I stood and held out my hand to pull him off the ground. “Go get dressed and grab your coat,” I told him. “Then meet me in Bryce’s office.”
“Huh?”
“Don’t ask, just get your ass down there within the next five minutes if you want to get the fuck out of here,” I warned him. I barely heard Cody thanking me as he raced out of the gym toward the dorm area.
Chapter 21
“Hey, while he’s dealing with Cody, do you have a minute?” Eric asked as soon as Drew was out of the room. His timing made me wonder what was going on and if it had something to do with Drew. He seemed to be doing better about wanting to get out of the house, but that didn’t mean anything.
“Yeah, is everything okay?” I closed down the grant application I’d been working on all morning so Eric had my undivided attention.
“Yeah, it’s nothing bad,” he assured me. I relaxed a bit, trying to mirror his calm demeanor. “I wanted to talk to you about the center.”
“What about it?” I asked.
“I want to help.” That would be a welcome change, because the more I tried to accomplish, the more I realized the founder had been in over his head trying to open an office in the Midwest without being able to commit the time needed to make it successful. I was beginning to resent him, because if things didn’t change quickly, the people who’d come to rely on our services would be without when we were forced to shut the doors. Rather than race around the desk and tackle Eric for offering his assistance, I waited impatiently for him to explain himself.
“In what way? We could always use more mentors if that’s what you’re talking about.”
“Well, that too, but I was thinking about helping you,” he informed me. “I’ve decided that unless a miracle occurs in the next few weeks, I’m going to tell my agent I’m done playing. At this point, I feel like I’ll be lucky to get anything other than a minor league deal, and I’m too old to deal with that again.”
“Although it’d be great to have someone I can trust in here with me, it’d be one hell of a pay cut for you,” I responded.
“That’s the best part. I don’t need the money. Between what I’ve saved and invested over the past fourteen years and what my grandfather left me in his will, I’m set as long as I’m not stupid with my money.”
This was seriously like a dream come true. I knew Eric had a degree in business administration, which was exactly what we needed. The problem was, if he took the job, I wouldn’t be needed here, and I’d just about convinced the founder that it was imperative for me to relocate permanently. Still, having someone with Eric’s attention to detail and ability to pinch pennies without demanding a huge salary was a godsend.
“The main problem I’m having is that I don’t want to walk away from baseball and have to try and figure out what to do with my life,” Eric admitted. “And the more I hear you and Drew talk about the kids here, the more I realize this is something I could do well and it’d be helping others. My grandpa was always big on giving back, and I think he’d support this decision if he was still alive.”
“You sure this is what you want to do?” I asked. If I took this proposal to the founder, I needed to know it wasn’t going to come back and bite me in the ass when Eric changed his mind. Non-profit work was rewarding, but it was also thankless much of the time. Long hours, low pay, and little room for either to improve.
“One hundred percent,” he assured me. It became impossible for me to keep my hands off him a minute longer. I kicked my chair back as I stood and stalked around to where he was sitting. I leaned forward with my hands on the arms of his chair and watched him swallow hard as he looked up at me. He licked his lips, and I knew he was thinking the same thing I was. Unfortunately, there were too many people here for me to bend him over the desk and seal this deal by fucking him into next week. “Don’t look at me like that.”
“Like what?” I teased, making a point to stare down at the significant bulge in his pants. “Like I’d love nothing more than to strip you naked and fuck you? Like you’ve just lifted a huge weight off my chest and deserve a reward?”
He swallowed hard again. He shifted in his seat and reached down to adjust himself. “Yeah…that.”
“There are too many people here, so that’ll have to wait until tonight at your place,” I responded, my voice low and husky. I knew exactly what that tone did to Eric, and I chuckled when he groaned. I leaned in closer, nipping at his ear lobe. “And it will happen. You know that, right?”
“Uh-huh.” He threw his arms around my neck when I pulled back to stare into his eyes, rising with me as I stood. His lips crashed against mine as I squeezed his ass, devouring me, filling me with the blend of coffee and spearmint that was uniquely Eric.
There was a quick knock at the door and we flew apart before we lost complete control. Drew walked in, took one look at both of us, and shook his head. “I can’t leave you two alone for five minutes, can I?”
“We…uh…I just told Bryce about my idea to help him get the center back on its feet and he was thanking me for my generous offer,” Eric said in a rush. Drew glided across the room, his narrow eyes focused on Eric. “You’re not mad, are you?”
“Why would he be mad?” I asked at the same time Drew voiced the same question.