What’n the name ... I say there, chaps, have a care, wot. A gentle shake’s all that’s needed t’wake your jolly old military commander. Ho hum, what’s up with you bounders, all standin’ round with faces like flippin’
fried frogs?
Memm seized his ears and hauled him upright. Candied chestnut trifle, sah, where is it?
Scarum transformed into the picture of outraged innocence. Candied chestnut trifle, marm, what’re you wafflin’ on about, wot wot? Never come across one in me life, no marm!
He winced as Kroova ripped the sticky chestnut from between his ears and stuck it on the end of his nose. Quite deliberately, the sea otter wiped cream from Scarum’s whiskers and smeared it along his top lip like a moustache. Kroova brought his face close until they were eye-to-eye.
That candied chestnut trifle, you’orrible great food-bag. Don’t tell lies, yore only makin’ it worse for yoreself!
Scarum forced a weak smile. Oh, that one! Well, why didn’t you say, old lad? I, er, spotted it in the kitchen an’ just took a small nibble, nothin’ too drastic, wot.
The Abbot stared questioningly at him. A small nibble?
Scarum nodded emphatically. Yes, sah, barely a smidgen. Don’t know what happened to the rest of the confounded trifle. 1 expect those moles guzzled it. Small types, but incredibly greedy, those molechaps, I say, what d’you think you’re doin’? Yowch! Owch! Lemme go, mercy!
Memm and Kroova had him by an ear apiece. They hauled him off to the Abbey, with Malbun giving him the dressing-down of his life, accompanied by hard paw prods.
That trifle was to be shared out among the Dibbuns as a treat/ with the winner of the stone-skimming getting the first portion. Aren’t you ashamed of yourself, depriving those poor babes of their special treat?
Opening the Abbey door, the Abbot took charge. Thank you, Memm and Kroova, you may release him now. Right, master Scarum, follow me!
The door slammed behind them. There was an awed silence as the Dibbuns stood looking at one another on the doorstep. Ruggum spoke in a hoarse whisper. Boo urr, oi wunners wot zurr h’Abbot bee’s goin’ t’do to Scarum?
Mousebabe Turfee had some definite views on the subject. Choppa off’n his tail an’ baff de daylights out of him, an’ make’im go fbed for fifty’leven days. Ho yes!
Memm picked the mousebabe up. Is that all? Lettin’ the cad off far too easy, if y’ask me, wot!
Later that evening, Friar Gooch and Furrel made it up to the Dibbuns by creating another trifle and serving it out to them in the orchard.
The Abbot came out to join them, gratefully accepting a bowl of the delicious trifle and a beaker of strawberry fizz. Crowding around him, the Dibbuns eagerly wanted to know what punishment had been meted out to the greedy hare. As each enquiry became more gruesome, the Abbot called for quiet.
No, no, I never chopped off his tail or boiled him up in the soupÑwhat a bloodthirsty notion!
Crikulus could no longer restrain his curiosity. Then how did you deal with the wretch, Father?
Putting aside his bowl, the Abbot explained. Well, the first thing I did was to put him on a diet for three daysÑonly one portion of lettuce leaves and water per day. Then I locked him in the main Dibbuns’ dormitory with pail, scrubber, broom and duster. Scarum must scrub the place from top to bottom, floor, walls, windows, everything. After that he must restuff all the mattresses, make up the beds with clean bed linen and wash all the old stuff. That should keep him amused!
Opinions were divided, with Dibbuns still muttering darkly of tail chopping and soup boiling, whilst the elders nodded sagely.
Kroova smiled with satisfaction. Three days with just one meal a day of lettuce an’ water? You’ll’ear ole Scarum yowltn’ a league away!
Looking over the top of his glasses, the Abbot agreed. I’ve no doubt we will. I’ve also stripped him of his command. Kroova, you’ll be in charge of the wallguards. Every other beast can sleep out here in the orchard.’Tis a fine warm night here, and out of yowling range, too.
The Dibbuns cheered gleefully. Sleeping out in the orchard was an adventure for them. Sister Vernal, Mimsy and Memm exchanged grim looks; their night’s work was cut out for them, keeping the Abbeybabes together in one place.
Dawn was well up and a fresh summer’s day was under way. A needlepoint of sunlight pierced the gloom of Brock-hall. Zassaliss uncoiled, dealing the other two adders light blows with his blunt nose.
Hisssst! Sssomething goesss on outsssside, let usss ssseeee!
Kurda had chosen the skinniest, most useless-looking Freebooter, an old searat called Whidge. The remainder of the Seascab’s crew were forced to watch, helpless and unarmed, as Vorto and three Ratguards laid paws on Whidge, dragging him shrieking to an open spot within view of the door in the oak tree. When Whidge saw the stake, driven deep into the ground, with a rope collar attached to it, he dug his footpaws in and wailed aloud to his comrades, Don’t let’em do this t’me, mates,’elp me,’elp me!
Ablow to his jaw from Vorto’s spearbutt knocked the old searat senseless.
Ratguards menaced the Freebooters with their spearpoints as Kurda addressed them warningly.
Dat von is old and useless. Anybeast tryink to rescue’im vill take his place, yarr?
Cowed and leaderless, they hung their heads in silence. Vorto swiftly bound Whidge’s paws together and tightened the rope halter at the back of the searat’s neck, where he could not reach it. Riggan signaled everybeast back to the cover of the undergrowth where Vorto placed two Rat-guards with each group of Freebooters. They held the crewbeast’s weapons, ready to distribute at a nod from their captain, while Kurda took to a high fernbed, where she crouched with Vorto and Riggan on either side of her. The Pure Ferret could see the door from her vantage point. She drew her sabre.
Und now ve haff only to vait!
From his spyhole behind the door, Zassaliss and the other two snakes had seen all that went on. Sesstra hissed softly, They leave ussss food, they fear usssss! Her brother Harssacss flickered his tongue sensuously.
Brother Zassaliss, doessss not the ssssight of food make usssss ravenousssss?
Zassaliss was bigger and more powerfully built than his brother and sister. He retreated down the tunnel, pulling them along with him.
Sarengo’s rusty mace chain clanked as he halted a safe distance away from the entrance.
Can you not ssssee, it issss a trap. We will sssstay here, sssstill and sssssilent. The day will be warmÑat noon they will tire of waiting and sssssleep. Then we will sssstrike fasssst and sssseize the bait!
You two take him. I will watch over ussss and take care of any foolsss who try to attack usss!
Triss left the main body of the column and went ahead to catch up with Mokug. The sprightly old hamster was scurrying along, with his eyes fixed on the woodlands ahead. He pointed. Haharr, we’re gettin’ near there, missy, see. Laburnums, there’s plenty of’em in this neck o’ the woods.
Triss saw the splotches of hanging yellow blooms amid the trees. D’you know which is the right one?
Mokug plowed onward. I will when I sees it, I’m shore!
Skipper caught up with them, looking doubtful. We’re a good way east o’ the place where 1 found the capes an’ lanternsÑquite a ways, in fact.
Ahoy, Mokug, are you sure it’s round here someplace?
The golden hamster halted. Tis our lucky day, matesÑthere’s the leanin’
ash, dead ahead!
Some unknown force of nature had caused the ash tree to grow at a strange angle. A laburnum had caught the ash trunk in its fork as it sprouted.