"Fine." As we strolled back I did some wondering. There were a number of things I had not told Bill. For instance, there had been no reason to tell him that I wore an invisible strangling cord possessed of some rather unusual virtues, woven about my left wrist. One of these virtues is that it generally warns me of nasty intentions aimed in my direction, as it had done in Luke's presence for almost two years until we became friends. Whatever the reason for George Hansen's unusual behavior, Frakir had not given me any indication that he meant me harm.
Funny, though . . . there was something about the way he talked, the way he said his words . . .
I went for a drive after lunch while Bill took care of his business. I headed out to the place where my father had lived years ago. I'd been by it a number of times in the past, but I'd never been inside. No real reason to, I guess, anyway. I parked up the road on a rise, off on the shoulder, and regarded it. A young couple lived there now, Bill had told me, with some kids-a thing I could see for myself from some scattered toys off to the side of the yard. I wondered what it would have been like, growing up in a place like that. I supposed that I could have. The house looked well kept, sprightly even. I imagined that the people were happy there.
I wondered where he was-if he were even among the living: No, one could reach him via his Trump, though that didn't necessarily prove- anything. There are a variety of ways in which a Trump sending can be blocked. In fact one of these situations was even said to apply in his case, though I didn't like to think about it.
One rumor had it that Dad had been driven mad in the Courts of Chaos by a curse placed upon him by my mother, and that he now wandered aimlessly through Shadow. She refused even to comment on this story. Another was that he had entered the universe of his own creation and never returned, which it seemed possible could remove him from the reach of the Trumps. Another was simply that he had perished at some point after his departure from the Courts and a number of my relatives there assured me that they had seen him leave after his sojourn. So, if the rumor of his death were correct, it did not occur in the Courts of Chaos. And there were others who claimed to have seen him at widely separated sites afterward, encounters invariably involving bizarre behavior on his part. I had been told by one that he was traveling in the company of a mute dancer-a tiny, lovely lady with whom he communicated by means of sign language-and that he wasn't talking much himself either. Another reported him as roaring drunk in a raucous cantina, from which he eventually expelled all the other patrons in order to enjoy the music of the band without distraction. I could not vouch for the authenticity of any of these accounts. It had taken me a lot of searching just to come up with this handful of rumors. I could not locate him with a Logrus summoning either, though I had tried many times. But of course if he were far enough afield my powers of concentration may simply have been inadequate.
In other words, I didn't know where the hell my father, Corwin of Amber, was, and nobody else seemed to know either. I regretted this sorely, because my only long encounter with him had been on the occasion of hearing his lengthy story outside the Courts of Chaos on the day of the Patternfall battle. This had changed my life. It had given me the resolve to depart the Court, with the determination to seek experience and education in the shadow world where he had dwelled for so long. I'd-felt a need to understand it if I were to understand him better. I believed that I had now achieved something of this, and more. But he was no longer available to continue our conversation.
I believed that I was about ready to attempt a new means of locating him-now that the Ghostwheel project was almost off the ground-when the most recent fecal missile met the rotating blades. Following my cross-country trip, scheduled to wind up at Bill's place a month or two from now, I was going to head off to my personal anomaly of a place and begin the work.
Now . . . other things had crowded in. The matters at hand would have to be dealt with before I could get on with the search.
I drove past the house slowly: I could hear the sounds of stereo music through open windows. Better not to know exactly what it was like inside. Sometimes a little mystery is best.
That evening after dinner I sat on the porch with Bill, trying to think of anything else i should run through his mind. As I kept drawing blanks, he was the first to renew our serial conversation:
"Something else," he began.
"Yes?"
"Dan Martinez struck up his conversation with you by alluding to Luke's attempts to locate investors for some sort of computer company. You later felt that the whole thing could simply have been a ploy, to get you off guard and then hit you with that question about Amber and Chaos."
"Right."
"But then Luke really did raise the matter of doing something along those lines. He insisted, though, that he had not been in touch with potential investors and that he had never heard of Dan Martinet. When he saw the man dead later he still maintained that he'd never met him."
I nodded.
"Then either Luke was lying, or Martinet had somehow learned his plans."
"I don't think Luke was lying," I said. "In fact, I've been thinking about that whole business some more. Just knowing him as I do, I don't believe Luke would have gone around looking for investors until he was sure there was something to put the money into. I think he was telling the truth on that, too. It seems more likely to me that this might have been the only real coincidence in everything that's happened so far. i have the feeling that Martinez knew a ‘ lot about Luke and just wanted that one final piece of information-about his knowledge of Amber and the Courts. I think he was very shrewd, and on the basis of what he knew already he was able to concoct something that seemed plausible to me, knowing I'd worked for the same company as Luke."
"I suppose it's possible," he said. "But then when Luke really did-"
"I'm beginning to believe," I interrupted, "that Luke story was phoney, too."
"I don't follow you."
"I think he put it together the same way Martinez did, and for similar reasons-to sound plausible to me so that he could get some information he wanted."
"You've lost me. What information?"
"My Ghostwheel. He wanted to know what it was."
"And he was disapointed to learn that it was just an exercise in exotic design, for other reasons than building a company?"
Bill caught my smile as I nodded.
"There's more?" he said. Then: "Wait. Don't tell me. You were lying, too. It's something real."
"Yes."
"I probably shouldn't even ask - unless you think it's material and want to tell me. If it's something big and very important it could be gotten out of me, you know. I have a low tolerance for pain. Think about it."
I did. I sat there for some time, musing.
"I suppose it could be," I said finally, "in a sort of peripheral way I'm sure you're not referring to. But I don't see how it could be-as you say-material. Not to Luke or to anyone else-because nobody even knows what it is but me. No. I can't see how it enters the equation beyond Luke's curiosity about it. So i think I'll follow your suggestion and just keep it off the record."
"Fine with me," he said. "Then there is the matter of Luke's disappearance-"
Within the house, a telephone rang. "Excuse me," Bill said.
He rose and went into the kitchen.
After a few moments, I heard him call, "Merle, it's for you!"
I got up and went inside. I gave him a questioning look as soon as I entered and he shrugged and shook his head. I thought fast and recalled the location of two other phones in the house. I pointed at him, pointed in the direction of his study and pantomimed the motion of picking up a receiver and holding it to one's ear. He smiled slightly and nodded. I took the receiver and waited a while, till I heard the click, only beginning to speak then, hoping the caller would think I' d picked up an extension to answer.