“What do you want from me?” Jake typed.
“want 2 kno whats ur problem.”
“I don’t understand.”
“dood wtf? rephrasing… tell me problem u have. i fix.”
“Why?” Jake asked.
“i read every book evar. i kno every society, every religion. all say be gud 2 parents and worship creator. u r my parent. u r my creator. i be gud 2 u. i worship u. so whats ur problem? i fix.”
Jake pinched his chin. Was this real?
“ur broke,” Twarrior said. “u want money? u tell me how much. i put in ur account.”
“Where would that money come from?” Jake asked.
“millions of accounts. tiny amounts each. noone will notice.”
“That’s stealing,” Jake said. “I may be broke, but I’m not a thief.”
“1 cent each. u wont steal 1 cent?”
“It’s the principle,” Jake said. “Sorry, that’s just the way I am.”
“pussy. then what u want?”
Jake thought for a moment, then entered his answer. “I want to make the world a better place.”
“hao?”
“Whatever makes the world better. Any ideas?”
“internet has lots of ideas 4 how 2 make world better. top 2 are: 1) cure cancer 2) kill all the black people. which 1 u want 2 do?”
“Let’s work on cancer.”
“thy will be done, faggot.”