I could not help thinking of the force and energy—able at the last minute, when he could not speak—to “grit his teeth” and “fight,” a minute before his death. What is the human spirit, or mind, that it can fight so, to the very last? I felt as though some one, something, had ruthlessly killed him, committed plain, unpunished murder—nothing more and nothing less.
And there were his cases of curios, his rug, his prints, his dishes, his many, many schemes, his book to come out soon. I gazed and marveled. I looked at his wife and babies, but could say nothing. It spelled, what such things always spell, in the face of all our dreams, crass chance or the willful, brutal indifference of Nature to all that relates to man. If he is to prosper he must do so without her aid.
That same night, sleeping in the room adjoining that in which was the body, a pale candle burning near it, I felt as though Peter were walking to and fro, to and fro, past me and into the room of his wife beyond, thinking and grieving. His imagined wraith seemed horribly depressed and distressed. Once he came over and moved his hand (something) over my face. I felt him walking into the room where were his wife and kiddies, but he could make no one see, hear, understand. I got up and looked at his cadaver a long time, then went to bed again.
The next day and the next and the next were filled with many things. His mother and sister came on from the West as well as the mother and brother of his wife. I had to look after his affairs, adjusting the matter of insurance which he left, his art objects, the burial of his body “in consecrated ground” in Philadelphia, with the consent and aid of the local Catholic parish rector, else no burial. His mother desired it, but he had never been a good Catholic and there was trouble. The local parish assistant refused me, even the rector. Finally I threatened the good father with an appeal to the diocesan bishop on the ground of plain common sense and courtesy to a Catholic family, if not charity to a tortured mother and wife—and obtained consent. All along I felt as if a great crime had been committed by some one, foul murder. I could not get it out of my mind, and it made me angry, not sad.
Two, three, five, seven years later, I visited the little family in Philadelphia. The wife was with her mother and father in a simple little home street in a factory district, secretary and stenographer to an architect. She was little changed—a little stouter, not so carefree, industrious, patient. His boy, the petted F----, could not even recall his father, the girl not at all of course. And in the place were a few of his prints, two or three Chinese dishes, pottered by himself, his loom with the unfinished rug. I remained for dinner and dreamed old dreams, but I was uncomfortable and left early. And Mrs. Peter, accompanying me to the steps, looked after me as though I, alone, was all that was left of the old life.
A Doer of the Word
Noank is a little played-out fishing town on the southeastern coast of Connecticut, lying half-way between New London and Stonington. Once it was a profitable port for mackerel and cod fishing. Today its wharves are deserted of all save a few lobster smacks. There is a shipyard, employing three hundred and fifty men, a yacht-building establishment, with two or three hired hands; a sail-loft, and some dozen or so shops or sheds, where the odds and ends of fishing life are made and sold. Everything is peaceful. The sound of the shipyard axes and hammers can be heard for miles over the quiet waters of the bay. In the sunny lane which follows the line of the shore, and along which a few shops struggle in happy-go-lucky disorder, may be heard the voices and noises of the workers at their work. Water gurgling about the stanchions of the docks, the whistle of some fisherman as he dawdles over his nets, or puts his fish ashore, the whirr of the single high-power sewing machine in the sail-loft, often mingle in a pleasant harmony, and invite the mind to repose and speculation.
I was in a most examining and critical mood that summer, looking into the nature and significance of many things, and was sitting one day in the shed of the maker of sailboats, where a half-dozen characters of the village were gathered, when some turn in the conversation brought up the nature of man. He is queer, he is restless; life is not so very much when you come to look upon many phases of it.
“Did any of you ever know a contented man?” I inquired idly, merely for the sake of something to say.
There was silence for a moment, and one after another met my roving glance with a thoughtful, self-involved and retrospective eye.
Old Mr. Main was the first to answer.
“Yes, I did. One.”
“So did I,” put in the sailboat maker, as he stopped in his work to think about it.
“Yes, and I did,” said a dark, squat, sunny, little old fisherman, who sold cunners for bait in a little hut next door.
“Maybe you and me are thinking of the same one, Jacob,” said old Mr. Main, looking inquisitively at the boat-builder.
“I think we’ve all got the same man in mind, likely,” returned the builder.
“Who is he?” I asked.
“Charlie Potter,” said the builder.
“That’s the man!” exclaimed Mr. Main.
“Yes, I reckon Charlie Potter is contented, if anybody be,” said an old fisherman who had hitherto been silent.
Such unanimity of opinion struck me forcibly. Charlie Potter—what a humble name; not very remarkable, to say the least. And to hear him so spoken of in this restless, religious, quibbling community made it all the more interesting.
“So you really think he is contented, do you?” I asked.
“Yes, sir! Charlie Potter is a contented man,” replied Mr. Main, with convincing emphasis.
“Well,” I returned, “that’s rather interesting. What sort of a man is he?”
“Oh, he’s just an ordinary man, not much of anybody. Fishes and builds boats occasionally,” put in the boat-builder.
“Is that all? Nothing else?”
“He preaches now and then—not regularly,” said Mr. Main.
A-ha! I thought. A religionist!
“A preacher is expected to set a good example,” I said.
“He ain’t a regular preacher,” said Mr. Main, rather quickly. “He’s just kind of around in religious work.”
“What do you mean?” I asked curiously, not quite catching the import of this “around.”
“Well,” answered the boat builder, “he don’t take any money for what he does. He ain’t got anything.”
“What does he live on then?” I persisted, still wondering at the significance of “around in religious work.”
“I don’t know. He used to fish for a living. Fishes yet once in a while, I believe.”
“He makes models of yachts,” put in one of the bystanders. “He sold the New Haven Road one for two hundred dollars here not long ago.”
A vision of a happy-go-lucky Jack-of-all-trades arose before me. A visionary—a theorist.
“What else?” I asked, hoping to draw them out. “What makes you all think he is contented? What does he do that makes him so contented?”
“Well,” said Mr. Main, after a considerable pause and with much of sympathetic emphasis in his voice, “Charlie Potter is just a good man, that’s all. That’s why he’s contented. He does as near as he can what he thinks he ought to by other people—poor people.”