My hand went to my neck, involuntarily.
“I get you.”
“Finish up, and get the fuck out, this is private business, so just stay quiet and no one will ever know.”
I ran up stairs, grabbed my case, and as many clothes as I could. I heaved my case out of my window, and heard it land in the flowerbed outside. I stuffed all my makeup and stuff into a small bag and grabbed my shoebox with all my money in it. I then ran from the house, leaped onto my moped, and disappeared round the bend. Once out of sight, I stopped and parked up. I walked back, crept round the side of the house and collected my case. All the stuff left in my room was Alexander’s, so my complete female side was now in my hands.
I managed to lug the case to my moped, and rode precariously up the road to the hotel.
I ran in and found Jenny. I told her what had happened, so she was really worried.
I tried calling my father on his mobile, and left a message.
I contemplated telling the police, but knew that if it went wrong, then the men would come to the hotel. I didn’t want to cause them any trouble.
Jenny ensconced me in her room, as she had two beds in there.
We worked the dinner as usual, and towards the end of the meal, I saw the man called Bruce look in the dining room. He saw me, and waved me over.
“Just checking.” he said, very quietly and menacingly.
“What do you want?” I asked, afraid now.
“You were a good girl. Now, keep sensible, and you’ll do fine. You could have called the cops, and you didn’t, that shows you’re not stupid. Now, I want you to pass a message to Johnny.”
“What message?”
“Tell him that we have his son, and if he wants to see the little fucker again, then he pays us what he owes. Got that?”
“You have Alex?” I asked, surprised to say the least.
“Not yet, but we will. Just pass the message, okay?”
“What name?”
“He’ll know, and no cops, or this nice hotel might burn down.”
He was gone.
“Shit,” I said, and Jenny came over.
“Who was that?”
“One of the men.”
“What did he want?”
I told her, and she laughed.
“They never guessed.”
“So, they’re still very nasty people.” I said.
I went and tried Dad again. To my relief he answered his phone. I told him everything, and he went very quiet.
“Dad?”
“You did fine, just stay put, and don’t say anything to anyone. I’m sorry that this happened, I never meant for you to get caught up in any of this.” he said, and put the phone down.
I was at my wits end, as I hadn’t a clue what was going on. Jenny told her parents that I was having some trouble at home, and I needed somewhere to stay for a while, and gratefully I accepted their hospitality.
The next day, I had an appointment with Dr Shepherd, so I rode off on my moped.
She was surprised to see me as nervous as I was. I tried to explain that it was a family problem, and not related to my condition. She told me she was upping my doses of oestrogen, and as there was little testosterone in my system, I could expect certain side effects.
“Like what?”
“Mood swings, lethargy, tiredness, aching joints, possible nausea and heightened sensitivity to the breasts.”
“Great,” I said, and she laughed.
She had me strip off and examined me.
“How are you down there?” she asked, indicating my groin.
“Fine, or it will be when the rest has gone,” I said, and she smiled.
She gently probed my breasts.
“These are quite firm. How tender are they?”
“A little sore when prodded, but not too bad.”
“You’re quite big already, you can expect a little more growth, so I don’t know if you will need implants.”
“Oh, how come?”
“I think your self-administered hormones helped, you never had a chance to start developing as a man.”
“Oh.”
“Your figure is almost perfect. You are so lucky to be young enough to start.”
“Tell me about it.”
She smiled. “How is your father about it all?”
I shrugged.
“Not exactly thrilled, but he accepts me, at least.”
“So many don’t, you’re quite fortunate.”
“Hmm,” I said. I would swap my dad for an honest one any day.
She looked at my head, chin and throat.
“What are you looking for?”
“Sometimes the male characteristics lie in the jaw, nose and throat. But, once again, you’ve managed to prevent secondary male characteristics, as you have no Adam’s apple, or a firm male jaw line. In fact you are remarkably feminine and a very pretty girl.”
I smiled, and she told me to get dressed.
She gave me an implant in my thigh. It would slowly release female hormones over a six-month period, and then I could replace it. I was resigned to the fact that I would be taking hormones for the rest of my life.
I was leaving the surgery when Dad’s Jaguar pulled into the car park.
He opened the passenger door from the inside.
“Get in.”
I got in.
He drove fast out and down the road. Pulling into a car park in an industrial estate.
He looked at me.
“Are you okay?”
I nodded. “What’s happening, Dad?”
“You don’t need to know. I’m in the shit, so I’m going to have a fucking job to get out of this one. So listen.
“The house is in your name. That is as Alexandra Lake. The solicitor has all the details. Here’s a passport and birth certificate as Sandi Hemmings, the birth certificate is a bloody good forgery. It is a complete replica of a real one, even down to the serial numbers. Only the gender and names are different, so forget Alexander Dean Lake ever existed. But the passport is the real thing, it was applied for quite legitimately. Use them for everything, until you know that you are safe. There is a card with all the details of the solicitor. Okay?
“Change the name on the registration document of your moped, to Sandi Hemmings, that way no one will trace it to the Lake family. Don’t forget the insurance as well. You will need to apply for a drivers licence in both names, so you don’t drop yourself in the shit with the Old Bill.
“I’ve put a lump sum in a safe deposit box in a bank in New York. The account is in your name, as Sandi Lake that is, and here’s the key, and the account details. Don’t for fuck sakes lose it. In my bedroom floor is a safe. Everything in it is yours, if you don’t see me again. The combination is your birthday. Don’t go back to the house for a while, and I mean it. It’s not safe, they will be watching for anyone to go there.”
He stared at me for a few seconds, and then reached out and took my hand. My mind was in a complete whirl, how the hell could I remember all this?
“Look, it’s too fucking late now, but I am really sorry the way things have worked out. You’re a beautiful girl, and I would have loved to have seen how things pan out from here. You never know I may, but I think this might well be goodbye.”
“Dad?”
“I’m so sorry. I’m a shit. I should have quit, but I didn’t, but I want you to know that I do love you, and I’ve done everything I can to ensure you at least have a better chance than most.”
“Stuff your money, I’d rather have you.” I said.
He looked at me, as tears came to his eyes.
He held me for a moment.
“Sandi, you’re just like your mum. You’re far too nice for me, just like she was. Just keep being nice, find a good man, and live your life to the full. I’m so proud of you. Look, I have written everything down - it’s all here in this envelope. Just remember that I love you.”
I just sat and wept.
He drove me back to the surgery and kissed me goodbye. I watched him drive away, believing that I would probably never see him alive again.