I stared at him.
“But I had normal male stuff.”
“Yes, but I suspect that you were sterile as a male. And, as you have a very nice set of ovaries, fallopian tubes, a womb and a cervix, I see no reason why you shouldn’t live a perfectly normal life as a woman. Particularly as I have constructed everything else you will need.”
“Did you use the extra skin from my penis and scrotum?”
“You didn’t have very much. I used what I could, and you have a clitoris, and labia. Your vagina is partly the outer skin from your penis, and partly tissue from your colon. There is a slight risk of scar tissue forming at the join, so it is important that you persist with the dilation programme we discussed.”
“What happens if scar tissue does form?”
“If you have difficulty with the larger dilators, then I may have to go in again to just make things a little neater. Otherwise you won’t be able to have sex properly.”
“You said that I had ovaries, are they working?”
“They are not fully developed or functioning yet. The hormone implant has had an effect, and they are at a stage of a prepubescent girl, of say eleven or so. But they are on the way, and are beginning to produce hormones of their own. I had to take the implant out, as your level of oestrogen was way too high to be healthy. I should say that you should experience menstruation in five or six weeks.”
“You mean I will bleed?”
“Yes.”
“But that means that I am..”
“It means that you are not a transsexual, you are a young woman, physiologically, psychologically, emotionally and legally. It doesn’t often happen, and you are my first.”
“Shit!” I said, and he laughed.
“So, let’s have the packing out in a day or so, and then you can start with the dreaded dilators. If I say so myself, I don’t even think your gynaecologist will be able to tell you haven’t been a girl all your life.”
“What would I need one of them for?”
“Well, I see no reason why you shouldn’t eventually conceive and bear a child, or several, if that is your wish.”
There was a rushing in my ears, and I was afraid I had misheard him.
“What?”
He smiled and sat on the edge of my bed. He took my right hand, as my left had tubes in it.
“Sandi, you are a perfectly normal girl now. You had a gender disorder, but I have removed the problem, and corrected any deficiencies. I believe that you will be fertile, and therefore, I see no reason why you shouldn’t have children.”
The rushing got worse, and I felt light headed. I was glad that I was in bed.
Tears sprang to my eyes, and laughter welled up in my chest. Both broke out together, and he smiled at me.
Never in my wildest dreams had I even considered the remotest possibility that I would ever be a mother. It was almost too much, and I wept and laughed at the same time.
Maureen came in and she and the doctor replaced my dressings, and he left me still giggling.
“So, it seems you are as surprised as the rest of us?” Maureen said.
“Just a bit,” I said.
“Did you have any idea?”
“I just knew I should have been a girl. I felt right as a girl, and wrong as a boy, it’s as simple as that.”
“Well, I do like to see a happy ending,” she said.
“This is just the beginning.” I said, and she laughed.
The door opened and a bunch of flowers walked in. Dave’s head peered round the side of them.
“Hi gorgeous, how are you?” he said, and I burst into tears, and Maureen left us, chuckling to herself.
Dave looked worried, as I don’t think he expected that reaction.
“I’m a girl, Dave.”
“I know that. I’ve always known that.”
“No Dave, you don’t understand. I am a real girl. The doctor found that I had ovaries and a womb and everything. Even my pelvis and chromosomes are female. The male bits were useless, I have always had girl bits, and now they are beginning to work.”
He stared at me, his mouth open.
“Dave?”
“Fuck me,” he said.
“Yes. I probably will,” I said, simply.
“Bloody hell, Sandi, are you sure?”
I nodded.
He took my hand.
“Look, just know that it makes no difference to me. I love you for who you are, and that’s all there is to it. But I’m pleased, more for you as I know it means so much to you.”
I started to cry again, he was just too nice to me.
He stayed for hours, and even sat next to me on my bed. Although the pain, or dull ache, was quite bad, I kept the pain relief to a minimum as I wanted to keep morphine out of my system as much as possible.
Dave distracted me, as we watched TV and played cards together. He was so tender and loving, I kept crying and laughing. He must have thought I was really dippy.
Jenny, Mike, Caroline and Rachel arrived, and a party atmosphere blossomed. Jenny had told them that I had ‘a problem down below’ and I decided it was truth time. My news didn’t really surprise anyone, particularly as they all thought I was a girl anyway. In fact, they were more surprised that I thought that I had been a boy in the first place.
A wave of euphoria hit me, and I didn’t need morphine, I was on a high.
I was tired, so Maureen shooed them away so I could have a sleep. Dave promised to come back every day, and he kissed me. I ached for him again and smiled. Now I was almost ready for him.
I slept most of the afternoon, and at about four o’clock a nurse came and checked my dressings.
“That looks very clean, so I think we will let you have a bit of air now. I’ll take out the catheter, so you can go to the loo.”
It was better without the tight bandages on, and I was allowed to walk about a bit. I felt rather wobbly, so was not awfully adventurous. They gave me a light tea, of which I managed to eat everything.
I had a little sleep after tea, but woke up when I felt a draught.
My Dad stood there.
“Hi,” he said.
“Dad.”
He smiled.
“I can’t stay long. I see you have coppers watching you.”
“You saw them?”
“Yeah, it’s easy when you know.”
“Jim Randall arranged it.”
“I was hoping he would. How are you?”
“Great. I was a girl after all.”
He frowned, so I had to explain it to him.
“Are you pleased?” he asked.
I simply smiled and nodded.
“Good, then I’m pleased for you. You looked great in the fashion show.”
“I looked for you, but you buggered off,” I said.
“Yeah, things are tricky right now. Frankie wants my balls.”
“He can have mine, I don’t have them any more,” I said, and he smiled, but he looked drawn and tired.
“I’m off to the States tomorrow. I don’t know if I’ll be back for a while. Did you clear out the safe in my room?”
I told him everything that I had done, and he nodded.
“Good girl. Frankie wants £8,000,000, or I’m dead.”
“I thought the deal was for £5,000,000?”
“Interest, he says, I have until the end of July.”
“Can you raise it?”
“Maybe, but it’ll be tight, and even then I reckon he wants me dead, so I’m looking at alternatives.”
“Like what?”
“Frankie is into a deal in New York. Drugs, so maybe I can help the FBI and get into a witness protection programme.”
“Don’t we do that over here?”
“I’m too well known. Besides, I’m wanted for murder now.”
I was silent, as I had forgotten that.
“Look Sandi, I’m so fucking sorry. I never meant for you to get dragged into this. When I saw those bastards with you, I just decided to do the only thing I could.”
“You didn’t have to, I was fooling them. They thought I was just the bloody maid.”
“They wouldn’t have stayed fooled for long.”