On the other side of the room, I notice Casey is already here, laughing with his group of friends. Of course, Viv is practically on top of him. I feel Todd’s fingers tighten their grip on mine, letting me know he saw Casey, too.
“Here we go,” he bends down and whispers to me.
I look up at him and smile as he guides me through the crowd to the backyard. There are still a lot of people back here since this is where the keg is, but it’s a lot less crowded. Todd grabs us both drinks. I don’t usually drink, but I figure just one would be good tonight, especially for the conversation I know we are about to have from the look on Todd’s face. He’s been really quiet since we left school.
His clear blue eyes lock on mine as he sits down next to me on the ground and hands me my cup. “What was that at the game? Why were you with him?”
“I was just saying hi. He was drunk, and I didn’t think he was going to be”—Think, Ash, what is the right word?—“as close as he was.”
“Yeah, he was pretty damn close.” Todd was hiding it before, but his anger is deep and fully on the surface now. I hate that we are here again because of Casey.
“I need you to trust me.”
Someone shouts out about winning the game and everyone cheers, but Todd’s eyes are focused on me, only me.
“I do.” His lips turn up into a smile. “I don’t trust him.”
“I know.” I brush away some of the hair hanging in his eyes. It’s still damp from his shower, so it’s falling into his eyes more than usual. As my fingers glide through it, I notice the light catching the sparkles embedded in it. “Hey, did the scouts like this glitter?”
He starts to laugh. “Way to change the subject, and yes, they did.” His fingers brush my cheek and run over the EHS from this morning that is now barely visible. “You had the right idea with minimal paint. I’ve washed my hair at least five times, and it still won’t come out.” He looks down. “Probably wasn’t the best idea. Coach wants to kill us.”
“But it was fun.” Now I’m the one smiling.
He leans in closer to me. “Oh, yeah? You liked that?” His grin is full of mischief.
It’s nice to be this close to him. Even though we are surrounded by people, I feel like it’s only us as he wraps his strong arms around me, and we just sit there on the grass while I lean back into him.
The stars are bright, filling the sky. I never really notice them unless I’m with Todd.
“Penn State gave me a verbal offer tonight,” he says so softly I almost don’t hear him. I did, though. I just wish I didn’t.
Stay calm, be happy, or at least act like you’re happy.
“Wow. That’s amazing.” I squeeze my eyes shut, grateful he can’t see my face since I’m leaning against his chest.
He runs his hands down my arms, and I delight in his touch.
“Yeah? Are you okay?”
“I’m fine,” I say too quickly, like a false reflex. “Really, I’m good. I’m happy for you.” Despite feeling tears welling up, I try to make my voice sound as normal as possible.
“I wanted to tell you first. We all had meetings with the Penn State scout. I think they are really interested in Brian and Ryan, too, as a package deal. Wouldn’t that be amazing if we all ended up at the same school, on the same team?”
“Yeah, amazing.” I continue to force my voice to sound steady, even though I’m feeling the exact opposite.
“A few scouts even asked to meet with Johnny after seeing him at state and then tonight. I guess our glitter stunt was good for something.” Todd gives a sarcastic laugh while I feel his fingers glide over the nape of my neck. I hear his voice, but he feels so far away already, like he’s not really here with me.
I glance around the party to avoid dealing with my reality, and I notice Shane and Johnny across Mark’s sprawling yard. The reflection of the moving pool water is bouncing off both of them as they talk, and it makes me think of the last time I was at a pool at night. It brings a smile to my face, even in this moment of deep distress.
Their conversation looks heated, though. I don’t know what’s going on, but I’ve never seen that look on either of their faces before. I don’t like it; however, I have my own issue at the moment.
“Ash? Ashley?” I hear Todd’s voice and zone back into our conversation. “Are you sure you’re okay?”
I turn my body to look at him, and seeing his gorgeous eyes makes me miss him even more already. I can’t believe I won’t get to see him every day.
I press my lips together to compose myself before I say anything else. I need him to believe me, or I know he won’t be able to truly enjoy this news. I run my fingers over his cheekbones. He really could be a model.
“I am, really. I’m good. I’m excited for you. I know you’re going to be amazing, and I can’t wait to watch you on TV.” I muster the most genuine smile I can.
His eyes study me before he finally smiles, too. “Well, I’ll probably be red-shirted for the first year, so you’ll have to wait for TV.” He leans in, and his lips connect with mine. “But coming to games will be fun. Then you can come see my dorm room.” His smile fills in the blanks, and I know exactly what he’s thinking.
He leans back into me as his lips connect once again with mine. The electricity that soars through me whenever we kiss never ends. His lips belong on mine. I don’t care that we are surrounded by people at this party; all I want is him.
His hands run down my back as he pulls me in closer. Then I feel a tap on my shoulder. At first, I ignore it, but then I hear his voice.
“Um, I’m really sorry to interrupt; you guys look busy.” I know this sound, and I know this is Shane on the verge of losing it.
I turn to give him a WTF look, but as soon as my eyes land on his, I know something is wrong. Todd must read him perfectly because I feel his hands drop away.
“I’ll let you guys talk,” Todd says as he gets up, giving me an understanding nod.
“Hamilton! Where is T.H.? We need him in here.” Brian comes barreling out of the French doors that lead to the backyard.
“Bri, over here,” Todd shouts back. “Looks like I’m needed inside,” he says with a smile, squeezing my shoulders then patting Shane on the back as he walks away.
“Okay, Shaney.” I pat the grass next to me.
He looks back over at Johnny who is talking to a girl that is exuding I-want-you vibes as she twirls her light brown hair.
Shane looks back at me and shakes his head. “Not here. Let’s go to the front; less people.” He holds out his hand to help me up.
TODD
“You are going down, Hamilton!” Brian shouts as he gets ready to serve. “This is a drink pong rematch. You may have won last time, but this is my night. The true winners will reign.” Brian has a huge smile on his face as he pounds his chest. He leaves the table for a second to kiss Blythe who is leaning against the wall, poised to watch the game, already amused. “I’m winning this one for my girl, our little beer wench,” Brian says as he smacks her on the butt with a grin.
Blythe has four red Solo cups lined up in front of her and a crystal pitcher filled with beer, which I’m sure Mark’s mom would not be pleased to know about.
“It’s Ryan and Todd versus me and Mark,” Brian continues.
It’s clear he is already drunk, but he’s so damn happy it’s awesome. He loves competition; it doesn’t matter the sport.
“Just for those who haven’t played before, this is drink pong, not to be confused with beer pong. Drink pong is the drinking game where you actually play ping-pong.” He glances over at Blythe with a smile. This is definitely for her benefit since we have all been playing this for years.
“When your team scores a point, the other team takes a drink. It’s a win-win. And Blythe will refill.” He gestures to the crystal pitcher brimming with beer. “First team to eleven wins.” He leans over the table and shouts, “And you pansies are going down!”
“Just serve the damn ball!” Ryan shouts back with a smile.