“I’m not done yet. Calm down back there.” I feel him trying to peek around me, so I shift a bit so he can’t see.
“Ashley?”
“Almost done.” I draw a heart around my masterpiece. “Okay, look.” I move so he can finally see.
A.T.
LOVES
T.H.
“They are the same letters you gave to me. Now I’m giving them back to you, but they come with a heart.” My fingers trace the heart I drew. “That’s my heart. I’m giving it to you, all of it.”
“It’s perfect.” He pulls me in and kisses me with just as much desire and longing as I feel for him.
Chapter 19: Moment of Truth
ASHLEY
It’s been five weeks since Todd’s accident. He’s truly mastered the crutches. He’s incredible on them. It’s as if they are a part of him. I swear he could run a marathon using them. They haven’t held him back at all.
This past Friday was his first performance at Joe’s. It turns out, since the stage is so small, there was no room for RTS, so it was just Todd and Shane. It’s truly wonderful when Karma falls into place.
Todd and Shane sound amazing together. It’s like the acoustic version of each song with Todd’s guitar and Shane on drums. That’s all you really need. And Todd’s voice is so soulful you can feel the lyrics when he sings. I fall more in love with him every time I see him perform.
The place was packed, and since he’s still in his full leg cast, he performed sitting down with his cast propped up. There is literally no space left to sign; there are so many signatures. Mark wrote an apology letter down the entire right side of the cast and singed it: Love, Francis. It’s actually pretty funny if you read it. Still, I know he feels really guilty and blames himself for Todd’s accident.
Since it’s early February and freezing, Todd had to buy a ton of sweatpants and cut the leg so the cast could fit through. Of course, he would look good in a paper bag, so the cast somehow makes him even hotter, especially when he’s on stage, holding a guitar.
Right now, we are sitting in the doctor’s office waiting room. Signing day is tomorrow; therefore, he has to get one more x-ray today so the doctors can all have one last look. To date, it’s been healing quicker than they thought it would. However, this is the day that will be the final decision maker.
I look over at him, noting he’s on edge. His left leg is bouncing up and down a mile a minute. I look around the waiting room at Ryan and Sid, and I’m trying hard not to laugh because we are all wearing the same nervous expression.
Ryan gave Todd a ride since he can’t drive. Actually, Ryan’s been giving him a ride every day, which has worked out great for me. And as a bonus, I get Sid, too, when she’s not with Simon.
Ryan is the first to break our nervous silence.
“It’s gonna be good news. I know it.”
Todd lifts his head to look up from the cradle he’s created with his hands where his head has been buried since we got here. He gives Ryan a half smile then quickly goes back to leaning his forehead against his hands. The whole time, Todd has been positive, but now that this is the moment of truth, he’s a bit tense. He hasn’t said a word since we left school. He’s never this quiet.
“Ryan is totally right,” Sid says with a big smile.
When Todd gives her the same head lift and a half smile, my stomach starts turning over with nerves for him.
“I’m here. I made it. Did you go back yet?” Mrs. H. comes bustling in, disrupting the silence. She’s just as anxious as the rest of us.
Head lift, half smile for his mom.
A nurse opens the door to the waiting room. “Todd Hamilton?”
“Oh, good,” Mrs. H. says as she gets up to go with him.
Todd hops up on his good leg and grabs the crutches resting next to him. His movements are so fluid it’s as if this has always been his routine. He looks back at me before he goes through the door and gives me that same half smile.
I mouth, “Good luck,” and then we are alone: me, Sid, and Ryan. We make nervous small talk as I fidget with the bracelet Todd gave me. It’s finally back on my wrist where it belongs after months of hiding away in my drawer to help prove we weren’t together. I also can’t stop running my thumb over his class ring. In some strange way, I feel closer to him just by touching it.
After what feels like hours, the door opens, and we all instinctively stand up.
Todd is the first one my eyes land on, which is great. However, his face is flat, unreadable, which is not great. Oh, God, they are pulling the offer.
“Well?” Ryan says, unable to stand the suspense.
Then Todd’s eyes lock with mine, and his lips turn up into a bright smile. “The cast comes off in a week, and then the real work begins.”
“Yes! Yes. I knew it.” Ryan practically flies through the air and tackle hugs him, almost knocking him over.
“Let’s not re-break it,” Todd says as he tries to regain his balance, and we all start to laugh at Ryan’s genuine enthusiasm.
“Someone better text Brian. He’s even texting me now,” Sid says as she hugs her brother.
“Yeah, he sent me, like, twenty texts while we were in there,” Todd says with a chuckle.
“Did you tell him yet?” Ry asks as he pulls out his phone.
“Not yet.”
“Let’s have a little fun.”
Todd shakes his head. “Oh, man, I don’t know if he can handle it.”
But Ryan’s phone is already ringing on speaker.
Brian picks up on the first ring. “Ry, what happened? Is all good?”
Ryan holds up his finger for all of us to be quiet. “It’s not good, man.”
“What? What do you mean? Where’s Todd?”
“He’s too upset to talk right now.”
I have to cover my mouth to hide my laugh. Todd and Ryan’s eyes are locked while Todd nods his head with a grin from ear to ear. It’s as if they have their own unspoken language.
My heart is bursting seeing Todd this happy. I can tell a giant weight has been lifted from his shoulders.
“Yeah, Penn is pulling their offer, and they are prepping him for surgery right now.”
“Surgery? Why?” It sounds like Brian is going to jump through the phone.
Todd smiles and shrugs, as if silently asking Ryan if they should stop. Ryan shakes his head with a smile.
“They have to re-break it. It’s not healing properly.” Ryan nods his head to Todd.
“Are you pulling my leg?” Brian asks.
“That’s a terrible thing to say right now, don’t ya think?” Ryan is really laying it on thick. Man, he’s good.
Again, why didn’t I get this gene?
“Oh, man, you’re right. I’m sorry.” It sounds like Brian is going to lose it. His voice is starting to crack, so the boys both give each other a look to end it.
“You should’ve been here, man,” Todd says.
“What? Todd? Is that Todd?” Brian asks.
“I said, you should have been here,” Todd repeats with a mischievous grin.
“What the fuck? You were kidding? You assholes! You’re kidding?”
Everyone is hysterical at this point. I’m laughing so hard I can’t catch my breath.
“Assholes,” Brian repeats. “So you’re good?” he finally asks.
“Yeah, I’m good,” Todd says through his laugh. “The cast comes off in a week.”
“Hell, yeah, baby! College, here we come!”
“Talk to you later, jackass. Tell Blythe we say hi since we know that’s where you are.” Todd winks at me.
“You guys are dicks. You know that?”
Ryan hangs up with that same, sly grin. “Man, that was fun. We should’ve kept it going.”
“No, it was perfect!” Todd says as we all start to get our stuff together.