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“It sounds like your security chief has been hiding information from you, Ceridwen. Someone has been looking for dwarves that were here a century ago. Anyone with contacts in the Weird knows about it. I have it on good authority that it’s Nar they’ve been looking for,” I said.

“A curious claim, Nar, don’t you think?” Ceridwen asked.

Nar bowed. “M’lady, I do not know this gentleman, but I will not be spoken ill of. Our facilities were being attacked, and I took appropriate measures to protect us as you requested.”

“You weren’t being attacked, Ceridwen—he was. He’s been using your Hunt to protect himself if Gerda caught up with him,” I said.

Ceridwen didn’t take her attention off Nar. “What did she want with him?”

“Her last victim said she was looking for a stone ward that he knows about,” I said.

We both have held the truth spear, macGrey. I sense you are not telling me everything, she sent. Ceridwen had brought the spear to Boston, not realizing what it was. Access to it appeared in our minds at the same time, and we struggled over control of it. In the end, it came to me, but not before Vize used it to kill her. And now he had it again. I shrugged and glanced at Nar. I wasn’t going to share anything with a dwarf I didn’t know.

Nar drew a round polished stone out of his pocket and tossed it to me. “That is what she wanted. Stone wards are keyed to our glamour defenses.”

“These alleys and tunnels are our sanctuary. If anyone were to gain access uninvited, we would be at their mercy,” Ceridwen said.

I rolled the stone in my palm, feeling the essence cycling within it. It matched the ones Janey Likesmith had found on the dead dwarves at the morgue. I handed it to Murdock. “It’s like a pass key through the essence barriers and works with your body signature. It resonates with the same essence as the shield and lets you through if you have it on you.”

“Why not change the lock?” Murdock asked.

Nar held his hand out. “We do, but it takes time to modify all the barriers.”

Murdock tossed the stone back to Nar. “We found one of these on Gerda Alfheim. Kinda curious it didn’t work for her. Maybe you found time to modify one or two?”

“We only defend ourselves,” said Nar.

“This is all beside the point. Nar knows that’s not the stone she wanted,” I said.

“What stone do you believe she sought, Grey?” Ceridwen asked.

“Something called a faith stone. Bergin Vize wants to know where it is, too. That’s who your people are fighting back there, Ceridwen.”

She placed the helm on the floor and stood, her wings sparking angry shades of red and orange. “Vize is here?”

“I talked to him myself not an hour ago. Your people interrupted the conversation. He has the spear, again,” I said.

Then it seems our interests are aligned once again, Grey. I will have my revenge against the man who murdered me, she sent.

Nar moved closer to her chair. “He is playing with you, m’lady, to discredit me. He knows how you feel about this man.”

“Gerda may have been your enemy, Nar, but Vize is the one you need to worry about,” I said.

“The Guild is getting curious, too, Ceridwen. Your security guy is bringing some heavy hitters down on you,” said Meryl.

“I will not allow the Guild in my domain,” Ceridwen said.

“This isn’t your domain. It’s a city neighborhood,” Murdock said.

“Ryan macGoren is not to be trusted. We will investigate this matter and proceed appropriately,” she said.

Murdock shook his head. “After what happened in the Weird, the mayor is not going to allow fey vigilantes to run around outside the law.”

“I will deal with the Guild and the Elven King on my own terms, not anyone else’s, fey or human,” she said.

“I’m still reporting it,” he said.

“Then perhaps you should make yourself comfortable until I decide the best course,” she said.

Murdock loosened his jacket. “Is that a threat?”

I held my hands up for calm. “Let’s bring it down a notch. We’re all on the same side here.”

“Speak for yourself,” Murdock said.

I ignored him. “Ceridwen, don’t do anything foolish. You’re already planning on taking on the Guild. Talk to Eorla. I can vouch for some of her people, and she’s operating under color of law at the moment. Her support will be a lot more useful to you than that of someone who has a private agenda.”

“My people come to me because they do not trust her, Grey,” asked Ceridwen.

“Donor has been creating that distrust. There’s a dwarf named Brokke who can vouch for it. Your people might trust him,” I said.

“I know who he is. He’s a Consortium advisor, not one of Eorla’s people,” Ceridwen said.

“Eorla trusts him.”

Nar leaned forward. “If I may, m’lady? I do not believe I am the one here with a private agenda.”

Ceridwen glared down at him. “I will speak with Brokke and decide for myself, Nar. If Bergin Vize is indeed behind the attacks on my people, there will be hell to pay.”

31

Not long before dawn, Murdock dropped me off at my apartment. I had to crawl out of the backseat. Meryl considered it a toxic zone and had made a permanent claim on the passenger seat. “Thanks for another quiet evening out with friends,” Meryl said.

I tweaked her nose. “When was the last time you got to knock out a nixie?”

She smirked. “Yeah, that part was kinda fun.”

I leaned down so I could see Murdock. “Are you going to report Ceridwen?”

“We can’t ignore a gang fight shaping up, even if it is the Tangle,” he said.

“Can you give me twenty-four hours to broker something between Eorla and Ceridwen? I want the Guild going after Vize, not them,” I said.

Meryl groaned and dropped her head back against the seat. “You can’t help yourself, can you? It’s bad enough you have Maeve breathing down your neck and Vize running loose, but you have to step into a territory spat between two chicks who wished they were queen of the world.”

I pursed my lips. “I think that’s oversimplifying it a bit.”

She rolled her eyes. “Danu forbid that happens.”

I leaned in and kissed her cheek. “Did I mention how much I missed you?”

She pouted, then chuckled. “Can you miss me a little more? I’m beat.”

I looked across the seat. “Leo? At least don’t mention Ceridwen by name. No one else knows she came back Dead.”

He sighed and shrugged. “Another day isn’t going to matter in this mess.”

I tapped the roof of the car. “Thanks, man. I’ll call you both later.”

I lingered on the sidewalk as they drove away, pretending to see them off. I knew the real reason I didn’t go upstairs right away but pushed down the thought. I wanted to go to Shay’s squat, hunch over the stone ward, and bliss out on the essence surge. It was a few short blocks away. I could be there and back in less than an hour.

I took a few steps toward the corner and stopped, realizing what I was doing. That wasn’t what I wanted. I didn’t want to be seduced by need. I didn’t want to be too weak to resist. I didn’t want to be controlled by something outside myself. I had lived my entire life the way I wanted, not because I could but because I couldn’t stand being controlled.

When I had my abilities, I had the ability to determine my fate. Sure, I worked for the Guild, did what I was asked, even stuff I didn’t want to do but was ordered to. That was always on my terms. I had options. I didn’t have to be a Guild agent. I could have left anytime I wanted. I could have used my abilities for something else.

When I lost my abilities, I thought I lost my ability to live my life my way. It made me angry, made me feel controlled. It took me a while, but I learned I was wrong. If I was controlled by anything, it was my perception of who I was. I had spent the last three years learning that I was more than just a body with or without an ability. I was more than that. I was the sum of my experiences. I was my own person. I was who I needed to be, not what someone else wanted me to be. I wasn’t going to invite in something beyond my control. Not again. I turned around and went upstairs.