Her eyes widened, but it wasn’t his words or the ache that caused her reaction. That first night when he had come to her apartment, she had never laid eyes upon his back. In fact, he had always kept his back from her, and now she saw why. How she had never noticed this escaped her.
The taut skin over each of his shoulder blades bared the angry marks of where wings had been. The skin once torn open and stitched back together. The flesh was puckered and painful-looking. Each vicious cut was at least six inches long and two inches thick.
Julian stiffened. “Does it bother you?”
“No. I just…didn’t know.” It wasn’t like she saw the Fallen in a state of undress that often. Typically, she killed them or ran tail. “Does it hurt?” she asked, feeling foolish for doing so.
He shook his head. “Not for many years.”
“Oh.” Lily had this strange urge to touch the skin. To come so close to what made the Fallen who they were. “Will it ever heal?”
“I will bear the mark of my fall for eternity.”
That was a long time to be reminded of his disgrace. Then again, he fell, and she doubted that was the worst of his punishment. As wrong as it was, she felt sorry for him. What it must have been like to make one mistake and lose everything he had known or cherished. It had been his choice, but had he realized the consequences and how vast they would be?
Gazing up at him, she realized she had never really considered the Fallen’s pain before, their loss. If she was cast out of the Sanctuary for one mistake, wouldn’t she turn bitter? Would the loneliness their kind faced over the centuries be enough to turn them into the creations she hunted?
“I’m sorry.”
Julian’s eyes widened. “You’d apologize for my fall?”
Not sure if she had made a mistake by uttering those words, she shrugged. He had been relatively evasive when it came to the reason why he fell, but it seemed unfair that lust had brought him down to Earth.
What a traitorous line of thought, she realized.
He stared a moment, then smiled. “You’re a strange Nephilim.”
She almost laughed. “You’re a strange Fallen.”
“That I may be, but you have nothing to apologize for. Not for me. Besides, not a part of me regrets my choice any longer. It is what it is.” He lay on his side, supporting his head with one hand, watching her curiously, completely at ease in his nudity. He reached out and guided her down beside him. Once he had her tucked against him, he continued. “Leave with me.”
“What?”
“Leave with me,” he repeated. “We could go far away from here.”
Lily stared at him for a moment and then laughed. It was a combination of disbelief and surprise. “You aren’t serious.”
“I’m not?” His fingers slipped over her rib cage. “We could go anywhere in the world. There are places far enough away that even your duty to the Sanctuary cannot reach you, Lily.”
He was being serious. Oh, damn. She pushed up so she was eye level with him. “Julian.”
“You won’t have to worry about getting in trouble,” he pointed out rather casually. As if what he was suggesting was no big deal. “You wouldn’t have to answer to anyone. You could be free.”
His words held a certain appeal. It was more than the idea of no longer being tied to the Sanctuary, but the fact he wanted her to leave with him. The notion did silly things to her heart and clouded her thoughts.
There were days when she wanted nothing more than to disappear. The overworked and underappreciated syndrome, but she never seriously considered leaving. She had to remind herself it wasn’t an option as he trailed those agile fingers over the tips of her breasts. Her mouth watered. “I can’t, Julian.”
His fingers slipped to the other breast that was now aching and heavy. “You can do whatever you want.”
She licked her lips. “I can do what I want now.”
Julian raised a doubtful brow. “That isn’t true. You’re chained to your duty.” His finger curled around her hardened nipple as he spoke. “Do you think your Nathaniel will allow this to continue?”
Lily bristled. “Nathaniel has no control over me like that.”
“He doesn’t?” Julian chuckled softly, his smile tender. “He controls everything. He holds your Contract. Does that not mean you must obey his every decree?”
“Yes, but…” She trailed off. There was no pretty way of looking at this. Julian was right.
“There are no buts, darling,” he whispered as his gaze fixed on her rosy peaks.
“You don’t understand,” she argued. “As nice as what you offer sounds, it’s not possible.”
He shifted against her. “We will see.”
She glanced down to where his body brushed hers. He was hard, and all thoughts of forcing him to understand it could never be an option were thrown out the window. “Julian?”
He paused, grinning devilishly at her. Then he pressed her back down as he placed himself over her body. “I believe I could do this all day.”
One gentle thrust set her on fire. She reached down and cupped his rear. “I think I agree.”
And Julian did, over and over till they collapsed into each other’s arms. He didn’t mention her leaving again, and Lily was grateful. They were able to create a little cocoon in her room, where the world outside didn’t exist. In his arms, she could forget about her duty and what she would face when she returned to the Sanctuary. It didn’t matter that it was only temporary.
Chapter Twenty-one
She woke to find the sheets completely removed from her and Julian’s lips latched onto her breast, drawing her nipple deep into the warm recesses of his mouth. Dazed, her hand fluttered to his head. A ball of lava formed in her belly. “What…what are you doing?”
He lifted his head, smiling down at her. “I was beginning to think you’d never wake up. It’s late in the afternoon.”
They hadn’t fallen asleep until the sun started to rise, and her muscles ached in a delicious way. When he hadn’t been doing crazy things to her body, they had nestled together, talking until they both passed out.
Sleep still fogged her brain as her lids fluttered open. There was a wicked glint to his azure eyes and a mischievous tilt to his sensual lips. He picked up her right hand, bringing it to his lips and sucking her finger into his mouth. She felt the pull all the way to her core.
“What are you doing?” she asked, breathless.
“I want you.”
“You have me,” she said, using the same words he had told her while on the couch.
“Do I?” He sat up, swinging his legs off the bed and standing in one fluid motion. “Prove it to me.”
Her heart thundered as she rose unsteadily. Things seemed to blur around the edges as her eyes locked with his. He gripped her shoulders, bringing her to her knees on the bed so that she was kneeling in front of him. The unspoken demand was clear, and her skin tingled.
She reached out, wrapping her hand around his cock without breaking eye contact. Moving her hand from his base to the head, she felt him swell in her palm.
“I woke up earlier, and all I could think about was you.” He brushed his knuckles across her cheek. “I can’t stop thinking about you— about this. It consumes my thoughts.”
She shuddered as his hand dropped to her breast, tweaking her nipple. Dipping forward, she darted her tongue out and circled his engorged head as she watched an array of emotions flicker across his striking features.
He groaned, staring at her with such intensity she felt like a goddess. She stroked his rim, laving the ridge with her tongue and then back to his head, lapping at the moisture beading there. “You like this?”
“Yeah…I like…a lot.”