He ground his teeth together, a vein in his neck bulging. “Don’t ask me to do nothin’, Ritz.” His neck tipped up in barely controlled anger. “You want me to sit back and let them get away with this shit?”
“Dex—”
“Look what they did to you!” he snapped. His eyes flashed bright. “They hurt you. They put their hands on you. I can’t sit here and look at you with a clear conscience. I should’ve never let this happen.”
Oh my God. My heart did this dumb pitter-patter-clench thing in reaction to his words, to his conviction, his loyalty...everything. I really was in love with this man. It was horrifying and amazing at the same time. I squeezed my fingers around his. “This wasn’t your fault, Dex. “
He scrunched his eyes together, blowing out a breath that made his lips flutter. Ticking his neck from side to side, he rolled his shoulders. “You’re my responsibility. You’re mine. And I won’t stay here like some punk. I think I’d do anythin’ for you, believe me. But I won’t do this.” He pressed his lips to my forehead, his breath hot. “I gotta do this.”
I could have let him go. I could have just sat back and let him seek vengeance on my behalf, but I wouldn’t. Not that day, not the next or any month or year after that. Because the situation wasn’t worth the possibility of losing him, and I wasn’t above playing dirty. Saying what I needed to. Doing what I needed to.
"Please. Don't leave me, too," I whispered.
That statement must have hit home in his thick, stubborn skull. He blinked those brilliant blue eyes repeatedly before finally nodding slowly, as if it pained him. He lifted a hand to rest on my bad arm, pressed his lips to my forehead and let out a shuddered breath. It was a low move to say those words to him but I didn’t care when he finally spoke. "Lemme get you some Advil.”
I looked up at him as I sat down. Dex's eyes were fierce on Wheels's, his mouth curled cruelly. That fierce tension pumping through his veins returned with every second he communicated wordlessly with Wheels before he retreated. It wasn’t until he had turned to walk out of the room that that static he seemed to radiate expanded, tripled and quadrupled.
The next thing any of us knew, he’d grabbed one of the stools at the bar and thrown it across the room, where it met a loud, messy death with the wall. Dex roared. He friggin’ roared this guttural, primal noise that could have caused earthquakes. Dex tipped his face up, hands clenched at his sides. "Goddamn it!" he yelled, raking his hands through his hair.
Holy crap.
He grabbed another stool by the legs and launched it in the same direction. “Fuck!” exploded from his lungs.
With one final burst of noise, he disappeared through the door. Just like that.
And for some not so strange reason, I trusted him enough to not assume he’d lied to me.
"That went better than I expected," Slim sighed.
I pressed the ice pack to my face again and reached out with my free hand to grab his fingers. "I'm sorry about all of this."
I was sorry. But more than anything, in that moment, I was mainly really pissed off.
What in the hell was wrong with my dad? What kind of a selfish asshole would put other people at risk for his mess? And why in the universe would I have to be related to him? I knew it was unfair and maybe even a little mean but what he was doing eclipsed any of my thoughts. There was no way he didn't know what the friggin' Russians or Romanians or Croatians were capable of. This gang and mafia crap was on a level reserved for the books I read and movies I watched.
I was pissed. And now that even more people that I cared about had gotten involved, this felt all the more like my own personal battle. My own mess to fix. Obviously there was no way in hell those jerks would get their money the next day but if I left, nothing would happen, right?
It was a long shot but it was the only hope I had.
Slim tugged at my hand, squeezing the fingers he held. "It's not your fault."
"It is." I told him with a sigh. I felt terrible.
I needed to fix this.
It was Wheels that told me exactly what I needed to do. "You still don't know where Curt is?" he asked.
I did—now, at least. Luther's friend had found him blocks from the house we lived in back... back before everything had gone to hell when I was a kid.
And I knew what I needed to do, regardless of whether or not I'd told both Luther and Dex that I'd let them handle it. Handle bringing him in, that is. The moment those assholes had come into Pins, this had become my problem. Not anyone else's.
Not even Sonny's.
Sonny. Crap. My fingers flexed nervously as I reached into my back pocket to pull out my phone. Later on, I wouldn't even remember tapping on his speed dial button. All I was aware of in that moment was that I had to be the one to call my brother and tell him. This wouldn't fix the trust issues between us but it was a start, I hoped.
I didn't even let him finish greeting me before I cut him off. The event and my recent decision taking the front of my thoughts by storm. He had to know. "Son, I have to go back home."
~ * ~ *
“We’re here, baby.”
I felt the hand on my thigh pressuring me back to life, and I yawned. It had to have been close to three in the morning by the time Dex was pulling Luther's pick-up into the driveway. Despite the nap I took at Mayhem, I was exhausted—absolutely exhausted. I also had a feeling that they’d given me some sort of sleep aid instead of Advil, but I wasn’t sure and I didn’t care.
After Dex’s meltdown, I’d only seen him in passing twice at the bar. He’d come back up the stairs with Blake in tow. Poor Blake who had to get a handful of stitches in his eyebrow. I apologized to him about a dozen times but he waved me off, and left the bar after giving me a hug that hopefully said he wasn't holding the incident at Pins against me. Dex, on the other hand, had watched me with a tight jaw, his fists clenched at his sides until he'd bowed over to kiss the top of my head. His nostrils had flared and the corded veins in his neck had been the only sign that he was on the edge.
The second time I saw him had been when he'd been heading down the stairs of the bar. I knew he was mad and even though all I really wanted was to climb onto him and ask for a hug, the distance was probably good for both of us. I needed to figure out how the hell I was getting to Florida, and he needed to chill out.
Worry and fear had burrowed itself into me, and I was trying my best to talk myself out of it. I wasn’t completely successful either. As long as I could leave Austin until this mess got sorted out, no one that I cared about would get hurt.
At least that's what I hoped more than anything.
And it was that argument that finally lassoed my half-brother into agreeing with me that I should try to find our dad. With supervision, he'd insisted, but I'd never agreed. Sonny realized, just like I did, that this mess had just turned into a disaster. A disaster that he'd tried to contain, but now that he was so far away, it fell on my shoulders.
It wouldn't be the first time responsibility was on me, and it certainly wouldn't be the last. The fifteen minute conversation had worn me down to the bone. If anything, it'd also made me just that much more angry, too.
Drained, pissed, and sore, I'd napped on the couch and eaten the food that one of the younger guys had brought me. Someone kept me supplied with ice packs for the first couple of hours. Even after that, I kept having people I'd met briefly in the past ask if I needed anything. My new friend Lee had come up at some point and rubbed the top of my head before sitting on the couch next to me and going straight into a story about how weird it was going to be getting his “goods” fondled at the doctor’s office.