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In addition, issues that would have been sources of difficulty or discipline in other homes did not cause problems among the Williamses. In working-class and poor homes, for instance, the loss of a library book was treated as a major problem. At the end of the school year, Alexander lost a library book. Late at night (after returning home from a trip to the bookstore), Ms. Williams, the field-worker, and Alexander looked for the missing book. Alexander spent much of the search time turning around in circles and even sometimes jumping on his mother’s back. Ms. Williams, saying, “I guess I’m buying that book,” gave up the search after about five minutes. She did not scold Alexander. Similarly, signs of disrespect for adults that were cause for chastisement in other families often evoked laughter from Alexander’s parents. The Williamses were fully committed to a strategy of concerted cultivation. They seemed delighted with Alexander’s overall development and they were unperturbed when he periodically used the skills they taught him to challenge their authority. For them, the benefits of “developing” Alexander outweighed the costs. Across middle-class families generally, the balance between the advantages and disadvantages of an emphasis on language use can be precarious. In the next section, we look at some of the potential drawbacks.

COSTS AND BENEFITS

In a society in which children must attend school, and in which those schools privilege vocabulary, knowledge, and reasoning, middle-class children such as Alexander Williams accrue benefits, even forms of “capital” from the language training they receive in the course of daily life. When Ms. Williams directs her son’s attention to a magazine article, for instance, he learns—and then shares—new information.

On the way to the basketball game, Christina pulled a copy of Time out of the seat pocket. She skimmed through the magazine and ended up on an article that theorized about the extinction of dinosaurs. She exclaimed, “Alexander—look! An article on dinosaurs. You [could] do your report on this.” She passed him the article, and he began to read it. About ten minutes passed and Alex handed the article back. He initiated a conversation about how old the Earth was. He then began to talk about the fact that some dinosaurs are now believed to have been mammals.

Embedded in this kind of casual information gathering and sharing is an important additional dividend. As part of such exchanges, children discover that their own opinions are valued by others, that their ideas are considered interesting and important. Adults tend to listen with care to children as they share information.

Middle-class children also receive grammar instruction in out-of-school hours:

Christina asked him, “What did your teacher say about practice? You know you have not been practicing that much.” Alex: “I know. He told me to practice all of this week. I sounded terrible. Me and Tom had practice together during our homework period.” Christina then corrected Alex as she drove. She was not scolding him, but she was firm: “Tom and I, Alexander.” Alex then repeated what she said, “Tom and I had practice together during our homework period.”

The ability to marshal evidence to support a position is an important part of the repertoire of skills middle-class parents teach their children. As the son of a lawyer, Alexander is expected, particularly in conversations with his father, to supply evidence for his opinions, even on trivial matters, as during this ride home after church:

Alex and Terry were deeply engaged in a discussion about which of the X-Men (hulking, green-faced comic book characters) was the most powerful. Terry urged Alex to defend his position as he suggested one X-Man was more powerful than the other. Terry often asked, “What do you mean? What episode did that happen in? Where did you read that at?” The importance of structuring an argument and referring to written material is stressed. Alex [takes out and reads from] his Secrets of the Marvel X-Men book to prove to his Dad that Wolverine’s claws were the only part of his body made of a “titanium alloy.”

As he reads aloud from the book, Alexander’s parents listen. Like conscientious classroom teachers, they note and comment on an error in pronunciation:

Christina said, “Go to the beginning and read it over again. I think you mispronounced a word.” Alex reread it and again mispronounced the word. Christina: “That word is pronounced lead [as in leader].” Terry: “That is a trick word. You have to look at the context to see how the word is pronounced.”

On another occasion, one in which the stakes again are very low, Mr. Williams nevertheless pushes Alex to defend his opinions. Noting an inconsistency in his son’s stated preferences among types of cars, Mr. Williams wants Alex to supply an explanation for the change:

Terry: “That’s not what you said before. Last time, you said the Miata, the Mercedes, and the Bugatti. Which one is it?”17 Alex (his voice rising): “I didn’t say that. Those three have always been my favorites.” Christina (soothingly): “Don’t worry about it, baby. You can change your mind if you want to. It is your prerogative.” . . . Alex, glancing at his Dad, says jovially, “This is America. It’s my prerogative to change my mind if I want to.”

The sort of verbal jousting between middle-class children and adults recorded in this field note is not unusual. Alexander and other children of his age and class we observed seem similarly comfortable offering information and advice to adults. For instance, a field-worker reported an incident in which Alex coaxed her to try roller-blading: “If you can ice skate, you can roller-blade,” Alex confidently assured this adult. And, again like other middle-class children, Alex sometimes gives his parents orders, albeit playfully. Mr. Williams recounted one such episode on an evening when he, Ms. Williams, and a field-worker were attending a school performance. After watching a musical in which Alexander sang from beginning to end, Mr. Williams (who dismisses musicals as a “ridiculous” form of entertainment) remarks that it felt as if the seasons had changed while the play was being performed. Laughing, he tells the field-worker that during the previous night’s performance, he had attempted to “sneak out,” but Alexander happened to be in the hallway and redirected him. As the group is leaving the building, Mr. Williams points out the spot near a rear door where his son had caught him.

Mr. Williams (chuckling): This is where I came out when I was trying to sneak out and Alexander saw me and said (pointing), “Get back in there.”

Mr. Williams reports that he did indeed return to the auditorium for the remainder of the performance.

In this instance, Mr. Williams is clearly amused by his son’s actions. Sometimes, however, middle-class parents’ emphasis on language use and reasoning results in behavior that is less acceptable. For example, when parents do not comply with rules but instruct their children to do so, the children openly point out the inconsistency. When Ms. Williams, Alex, and a field-worker are doing errands one afternoon, they walk off the sidewalk onto the dirt as they enter the store from the parking lot. Returning to the car, Alexander argues with his mother when she tries to rein him in:

Alex jumped over the flowers to get to the car. His mother and I took the steps. Ms. Williams said, “Alex, don’t do that.” He said, “Why not? We walked over the dirt on the way in.” She said, somewhat weakly, “Yes, but you jumped over the flowers. That is different.”

In addition, concerted cultivation can lead to role confusion, particularly over the amount of power that children have in the family. Within short periods of time, for example, there are radical shifts in the status that Alexander’s parents accord him. At times Alexander is treated similarly to how adults are treated: his opinions are solicited, he is given a “vote” in family decisions, and he even gives his parents orders. In other moments, however, he is treated as if he is a very young child, as in this example while the family is waiting to enter the church service:

Alexander was leaning on his father. Terry gave Alex a hug. Alex hugged his father tightly. Terry [then] cloaked Alex in his jacket. He made a humming sound as they hugged. Christina [then] asked in . . . a “motherese” tone: “Where’s Alexander?” Christina poked Alex who was still under his father’s jacket. (She asked) “Where’s my baby? Where’s Alexander?” Christina . . . exclaimed, “There he is! I see my baby.” Alexander laughed as his mother poked him. As a prayer became audible through the sanctuary door, Alex was freed from his play of his parents.18

Alexander clearly enjoys this playful moment. In other instances Alexander as well as other middle-class children resist their parents’ efforts to treat them as children. Instead, drawing on their verbal skills, they assert that they should be accorded special privileges and, when rebuffed, badger their parents to comply with their requests.19