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By the second day he was ready to move a little further up the coast to show her picture and see if anyone else might know where she was at, but, as he was fueling up, he watched a red Jeep pull into the store. When the young woman with blond pixie hair and a flowery, flowing baby-doll top and blue jeans climbed out, he knew without a doubt he found her.

He parked his car at the far end of the grocery store lot and waited. Thirty minutes passed and she finally came out pushing a cart with a few bags. She loaded everything into the Jeep and headed back out on the highway going north. He would have to be extra careful tailing her; he knew what kind of skills she possessed behind the wheel, and if she suspected he was following her, she’d out drive him, even if she was in a Jeep.

The road was dangerously curvy, up and down and sometimes would break free on the edge of a cliff that dropped off to the mesmerizing Pacific. There were two cars between them and as he rounded a sharp s-curve in the road he realized she must have turned off, she was no longer in the lead. He traveled to the next turn-off and headed back south, looking for the sign of a driveway. He passed one so obscure and small it didn’t look like a driveway, but more like an overgrown path. He saw it too late to make the turn so once again he had to continue traveling until he could reverse course. He made the sharp right and headed up the weed-ridden path. Surely there was another driveway that he missed. This didn’t appear to be traveled very often. Just as he was considering turning around, the woods gave way to a cottage set on a hill in an open field; a red Jeep was parked out front beside her unmistakable Shelby Aero under a car cover.

He was sure she hated him for what he had done to her and, if his plan worked, and she allowed him to get close enough, she was going to hate him worse by this time tomorrow morning.

He parked the car and walked up to the front door. He looked back and couldn’t see the road below, but it was a beautiful view of the ocean over the tree tops. He looked at the front porch, noticing all the flowers and the pair of rockers. Could it be that she had moved on to man number three? Perhaps Ryan didn’t know what he was talking about. The front door opened before he could step up on the porch, and she was standing there behind the screen door.

“Don’t take another step,” were her words of warning.

He could see a pistol in her hand.

This might be harder than he imagined.

Chapter Twenty-Seven

I pulled up to the cottage and grabbed my bags of groceries. Today was absolutely glorious. The smell of the ocean mixed with the fragrance of pine trees and wildflowers. It was a little piece of heaven. I was glad when I remembered Dobrey offering me this place; it couldn’t have been better timing. Ryan had been hovering over me after the attack, but he had to go back to his life, and I needed a lot of time to think. I’d only called him twice since I’d been here. Both times I borrowed someone else’s phone and made the calls when I was far away from Gualala. All I wanted him to know was that I was still breathing and was okay. I missed him so badly-mother hen routine and all. He had been my one true friend, but it was time to let him get on with his life.

I had the groceries out of the bags and on the table as I sorted what would go where, when I heard the sound of an approaching vehicle. I never got visitors. My heart picked up speed as I opened my purse and pulled the pistol out and slipped off the safety. Moving to the front door, I watched as a sedan with darkly tinted glass pulled up short behind the Jeep. I froze as I watched who climbed out. I didn’t know if I could threaten the one person in this world I loved with such strange desperation. I watched Micah look down the hill at the ocean and then turned and began walking up to the front door.

I couldn’t let him inside. I couldn’t let him do to me what he did the last time, and I might actually have to shoot him. I certainly wouldn’t be shooting to kill, but I couldn’t allow him to put a hand on me, not now. I opened the door and gave him my warning as he started to step up on the porch.

“Leese?” he replied in shock, his voice high pitched and strange as he looked at the gun in my hand.

“You taught me to shoot so I don’t think it’s wise for you to come any closer,” I warned.

“I’m not armed,” he stated, pulling off the light jacket he wore, and turning around so I could see that he wasn’t hiding anything.

“Really? I don’t see those hands of yours tied together and they are just as lethal as your guns-at least they were the last time you put them on me.”

He swallowed and ran his hand through his hair. I could see his eyes tearing up and the whole time all I kept saying to myself was, ‘Don’t cave, Leese, don’t cave.’

“What I did to you was unforgivable and I can understand why you don’t want me to get close, but you’ve got to believe me, Leese, I swear to you, I wasn’t in my right mind that day and I could never do that to you again. I look at you every day and every day I hate myself just a little bit more.”

“Well, you can swear all you want; I can’t afford to give you another opportunity. We haven’t seen each other in months and I know you haven’t been following me around all this time, so you haven’t seen me every day.”

“No, you were pretty tough to find this time, but I have the pictures Ryan gave me.”

That made no sense. I doubted Ryan would have anything to do with Micah and he certainly wouldn’t have given him pictures of me, “What pictures?”

“The ones he took of you the day after I-I…”

He couldn’t say it, but I knew what he meant, “It’s called rape, Micah, and if you think it’s hard to say then you should try living through it. I didn’t let him take pictures.”

“I guess then I’m not the only guy who didn’t ask for your permission,” he said as he reached into the pocket of his jacket and tossed a handful of pictures of me asleep in my bra and underwear onto the porch floor, “But you should at least be proud of the way he delivered them to me.” He had an odd sound to his voice, “He showed up with a couple big guys that grabbed and held me while he beat the hell out of me.”

My free hand went to my mouth to stifle the gasp.

“I deserved it and he did a good job working me over; fractured four ribs and a cheek bone in the process.”

“I’m sorry, Micah. I knew how pissed off he was, but I never dreamed he’d go after you.”

“But he also told me a few things, and I needed to see you to get the truth.”

My heart jumped in my throat as I prayed that Ryan had kept his promise not to tell what he knew, “What did he say?”

He took a tentative step up onto the porch and bent down to retrieve the photos, and then another step toward the door.

“Please stop, Micah. I can’t let you get near me.”

The tears had started running down his cheeks. “There is another picture-I-I carry with me,” he struggled to say, reaching back into the jacket pocket. He pulled out the picture of us on our wedding day as we stood by the well at the old monastery. “This one is my favorite,” he choked on a sob that struggled away from his emotional resolve, “I’ve got to know, baby. He said you didn’t leave me for him. He said someone forced you.”

“Was that all he said?” I questioned, an old familiar lump rising in my throat as I tried to steady the gun.

“Yeah-whatever you made him promise, he kept it. You’ve got to finally tell me. Hasn’t it been long enough?”

“I wish I could Micah, but it’s too late. I can’t change what’s happened and if I could have stayed with you, you’d have eventually hated me worse than you do now,” I felt the first tear roll down my cheek.

Hate you? I never hated you, baby-mad as hell, sure-but I’ve never hated you. You were everything I never knew I wanted until I met you. I have to know why you turned my life upside down.”