We are dating. Okay, yes, that was good. Very good. The relief that spread through her was palpable.
Then he added, “I mean, I think we are, at least,” and that relief drained.
Drained. Not a good word choice, she thought, laughing without humor. Because if what he’d said before, about Drainers destroying…if that was true, that would mean…. no. No. No! She would not venture down that mental path. Like a hypochondriac, she’d only convince herself that her “symptoms” were real.
Riley pounded to the porch steps and plopped down, resting his elbows on his knees. “If you really are a Drainer, you’re going to kill everyone I love.” He must have been reading her aura, must have realized the direction of her thoughts. “Hell, one day you’ll kill me.”
Absolute panic filled her at the thought of his death—at the thought of causing it. “I would never hurt you. Ever!”
“You wouldn’t mean to, but…” His head fell into his upraised hands. “Damn it! I can’t believe this is happening.”
“This just can’t be right, Riley. I mean, it’s happening so fast. I was fine, me, myself, only a few days ago.” Now everything was crumbling, leaving only ruins around her.
His laugh was as humorless as hers had been. “That’s the way of the world, Mary Ann. Everything changes in a blink.”
Not like this. Not for her.
No, not true, she thought next. She’d met Aden and in seconds, her entire world had changed. She’d discovered Tucker had cheated on her with Penny and in seconds, her entire world had changed. She’d learned the truth about her mother and in seconds, her entire world had changed.
She’d met Riley and in seconds, her entire freaking world had changed.
“Is there a way I can stop this? Reverse it?” she croaked out. “If it’s true, I mean.”
“No.” His unyielding tone left no room for doubt or argument.
Still she persisted. “Have you tried?”
“Yes.”
“And?”
“And the Drainers died.”
“How?”
“Through experiments.” He lifted his head and threw a quick glance behind him. He stiffened, sighed. “Now isn’t the time to discuss this.”
She couldn’t end the conversation on such a terrible note. “I don’t want to go inside yet.” She couldn’t pretend everything was okay. Not when tears burned the back of her eyes, not when she was shaking so much she could have been having a seizure. “And really, we can’t know for sure what’s going on with me.” When she got home, she planned to eat more food than her stomach could hold. That would prove her innocence. Right?
“Yeah,” he replied, but he didn’t sound convinced. “And I don’t want to go inside, either. So let’s chat about something else. I asked Aden, but now I’ll ask you. Why did you pick him to teach you self-defense? Why didn’t you pick me?” That matters? Now? she thought. But rather than protest, she grabbed on to the topic switch like a lifeline. This was normal. This proved he still cared.
She could have lied, spared her shredding feelings from further injury, but she didn’t. “I picked Aden because I knew I wouldn’t pay attention if you were the one doing the teaching. I would have wanted my hands on you, or your hands on me. I would have wanted to kiss you. I wouldn’t care about what you were telling me.”
Some of the tension left him, and he offered her a half smile. “Okay, then. You made the right choice.”
She relaxed a little, too. That smile, so genuine… He hadn’t gifted her with one of those in what felt like forever. But that smile also upset her—because she recalled something she desperately wanted to ask him. “Answer a question for me.”
“All right.”
Are you sure you want to do this? You’ll probably have to kiss this temporary good mood goodbye. Yeah. She had to; she had to know. “What about you and Lauren?”
Yep. Bye-bye, good mood. He lost all hint of happiness, scowling again. “Why do you ask?”
That was answer enough. “Just say what we both know you’re going to say.” Please don’t.
A muscle ticked under his eye. “Lauren and I used to date.”
Just as she’d suspected, yet the news was still devastating. How was she—a supposed Drainer—supposed to compete with such a strong, gorgeous vampire? Quite simply, she couldn’t. “How long ago did you break up?” Please say years ago.
“Let’s not do this, Mary Ann.”
“Tell me.”
He sighed. “We broke up shortly before I arrived here in Crossroads. We were never supposed to date, anyway. Vlad had promised her to someone else.”
Stomach churning…“So I’m the rebound girl?”
He snapped his teeth at her, pure wolf. “Mary Ann. You were dating Tucker when I got here. I should be asking you if I’m the rebound guy.”
Good point. Okay, she could let the rebound fear go. She walked over to him and eased beside him on the step. “Why did you guys break up?”
His green eyes pinned her in place. “You really want to know?”
Oh, God. No. “Yes.”
“I didn’t like the thought of her in danger, and she was always rushing right into it.”
Just like Mary Ann had done by going into town on her own. Only, Mary Ann was human, her skin vulnerable. Just crossing the street could put her in danger. Actually, she’d never felt closer to death than just then, her hopes and dreams burning to ash around her.
“Do you still have feelings for Lauren?” she asked softly.
“No.”
Too quick a response? God, she hated this. Hated her doubt. Hated Lauren, even though the vampire had been nothing but nice to her. And by nice, she meant that Lauren hadn’t stabbed her.
Do you still have feelings for me? She wanted to ask, but didn’t. Couldn’t. The answer might be the final nail in her coffin. He’d say yes, but she would hear the “but” in his tone. She knew she would.
“Well, the danger thing is just something you’ll have to get over, Riley,” she said, as if they were still together and not just a big, fat maybe. “You can’t be the one to save the day all the time. You can’t do everything on your own. You have to accept help. Sometimes that’s the only way to get the job done.”
“I know. That doesn’t mean I have to like it,” he grumbled.
At least he hadn’t denied her outright. That was progress, right?
“Right now, I want you to promise me that you won’t tell anyone, and I mean anyone, not Aden, not Victoria, about the draining thing,” he commanded. “Not until I find a way to fix you or reverse what’s happening.”
Could he, though? He’d already admitted Drainers died when others attempted to fix them. No, not true. He’d admitted that Drainers died during experiments.
“Okay?” he insisted.
Admission time. She stood, unable to sit still a moment longer, and shifted from one foot to the other, twisting the hem of her sweater. “I won’t tell.” She kept her back to him. “But…there’s someone who already knows.”
There was a rustle of clothes, then hard hands settled on her shoulders and spun her around. Riley had jackknifed to his feet, and boy, did he look ready to murder someone. “Who?”
Just tell him. Rip the Band-Aid. “The witch. Marie. The one I saw in town. The one who…appeared at the school this morning and told me she could feel me feeding off her.”
Pupils—wide, thin. Wide, thin. Like a pulse. “Why didn’t you tell me? Damn it, Mary Ann. I could have hunted her down.”
And done what to her? “At the time, I didn’t know what she meant.”
“She could have killed you!” As quickly as he’d exploded, he relaxed. His head tilted to the side pensively. “Why didn’t she kill you?”