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"This boy is on probation," he said. "Did he show up in homeroom this morning?"

"Yes," I said.

"Any trouble?" the Admiral asked.

There we stood, the three of us, taking each other's measure. Ferone was watching me through narrowed eyes.

"No. No trouble," I said.

I am writing this during my free . . . oops! un-assigned period, at the end of my first day of teaching. So far, I have taught nothing but I have learned a great deal. To wit:

We have to punch a time clock and abide by the Rules.

We must make sure our students likewise abide, and that they sign the time sheet whenever they leave or reenter a room.

We have keys but no locks (except in lavatories), blackboards but no chalk, students but no seats, teachers but no time to teach.

The library is closed to the students.

Yet I'm told that Calvin Coolidge is not unique; it's as average as a large metropolitan high school can be. There are many schools worse than this (the official phrase is "problem-area schools for the lower socioeconomic groups") and a few better ones. Kids with an aptitude in a trade can go to vocational high schools; kids with outstanding talents in math, science, drama, dance, music, or art can attend special high schools which require entrance tests or auditions; kids with emotional problems or difficulties in learning are sent to the "600 schools." But the great majority, the ordinary lads, find themselves in Calvin Coolidge or its reasonable facsimile. And so do the teachers.

Do you remember Rhoda, who left Lyons Hall before graduation? She is now writing advertising copy for a cosmetics firm at three times my salary. I often think of her. And of Mattie, who was in graduate school with me, and who is teaching at Willowdale Academy, holding seminars on James Joyce under the philosophic maples. And I think of you, in a far away town, walking serene in daylight from Monday to Friday, and I think I must be crazy to stay on here. And yetthere is a certain phrase we have, a kind of in-joke: "Let it be a challenge."

There goes the bell. Or is it only the warning signal? The bells have gone berserk. I now go to check the PM attendance in my homeroom Admiral Ass says it prevents escapes.

Love,

Syl

P. S. Did you know that according to the Board of Education's estimate it would cost the city $8 million to reduce the size of classes "by a single child" throughout the city?

PART II

8. From The Calvin Coolidge Clarion

Calvin Coolidge

CLARION

September

INTERESTING INTERVIEWS:

Miss Sylvia Barrett, the new English teacher, is not only everybody's choice "Audrey Hepburn" of Calvin Coolidge but is also a very attractive young woman of whom we are so very proud. The interview found her to be 5 feet 4 inches in her stocking feet, with brown hair and blue-gray eyes and very pleasant to talk to. She received her B.A. degree with Phi Beta Kappa and Magna Cum Laude (It's Greek to us!) and her M.A. (Miss America?) with highest honors. (Boy! What a record!)

Listed among her favorites are Chaucer the poet (That's Greek to us too!) and reading books. She is also partial to painting in her spare time (Don't go up and pose for her, boys!) and bicycling (built for two?), whipped cream (Oh, those calories!) and swimming (Yummm!); and she likes to visit different places like everyone else. She visited some places in Mexico last summer (Halba Espanol?). She feels that teaching here will be a real challenge to her.

Glad to have you at Coolidge, Miss "Audrey" Barrett, and hope you stay awhile.

A MESSAGE FROM OUR PRINCIPAL:

Your education has been planned and geared to arm and prepare you to function as mature and thinking citizens capable of shouldering the burdens and responsibilities which a thriving democracy imposes. It is through you and others like you that the forward march of democracy, spurred and fortified by a thorough and well-rounded education, will move on to greater triumphs and victories. We have no doubt that our aims and efforts in this direction will bear fruit and achieve the goals and objectives set forth, for in the miniature democracy of our school you are proving yourselves worthy and deserving of our trust and expectations.

Very sincerely yours,

Maxwell E. Clarke, Principal

COMPLIMENTS OF VANITY CORSET CO.

THE CORNER COFFEE SHOPPE: "WHERE FRIEND MEETS FRIEND"

HOW TO AVOID

FRESHMAN FOLLY

SOPHOMORE SLUMP

JUNIOR JITTERS

SENIOR SORROWS:

JOIN YOUR G.O.!!! GET YOUR G.O. BUTTONS WHILE THEY LAST !!! GO, GO, G.O.!

SCHOOL SPIRIT, ANYONE?

COME AND ROOT FOR YOUR TEAM

SCHEDULED BASKETBALL GAMES:

SEPT. CALVIN COOLIDGE VS. MANHATTAN MUNICIPAL

OCT. CALVIN COOLIDGE VS. (?) UNSCHEDULED

NOV. CALVIN COOLIDGE VS. (?) UNSCHEDULED

DEC. (?)

Dr. Maxwell E. Clarke

James J. McHAbe

Mary Lewis

SylVia Barrett

Ella FrIedenberg

Paul BarriNger

Beatrice SchaChter

Charlotte WOlf

Frederick LoOmis

Henrietta PastorfieLd

Marcus ManheIm

SaDie Finch

Frances EGan

Samuel BEster

FACULTY FLASHES

The teacher the girls would like to be on a desert island most with: MR. PAUL ("POET") BARRINGER

The teacher readiest with unselfish helps: MRS. BEATRICE ("MOM") SCHACHTER

The teacher who makes lessons most like games: MISS HENRIETTA ("PAL") PASTORFIELD

Most absentminded teacher: MR. MARCUS ("H2O") MANHEIM

Most glamorous teacher: MISS SYLVIA BARRETT

THE CALVIN COOLIDGE CLARION is "The Voice of Your School." Please subscribe and solicit ads to keep it "talking"!

We wish to express our gratitude to Miss Mary Lewis, Faculty Advisor to The Clarion, who so unstintingly gave of herself to us.

9. Those Who Cant

Sept. 25

Dear Ellen,

It's FTG (Friday Thank God), which means I need not set the alarm for 6:30 tomorrow morning; I can wash a blouse, think a thought, write a letter.

Congratulations on the baby's new tooth. Soon there is bound to be another tooth and another and another, and before you know it, little Suzie will start going to school, and her troubles will just begin. Though I hope that by the time she gets into the public high school system, things will be different. At least, they keep promising that things will be different. I'm told that since the recent strike threats, negotiations with the United Federation of Teachers, and greater public interest, we are enjoying "improved conditions." But in the two weeks that I've been here, conditions seem greatly unimproved.