"You're right, " she admitted softly, after a moment. "I don't. I'm sorry."
For the second time in this meeting, Christian looked astonished. Probably no one apologized to him that often. Hell, no one even talked to him that often. Certainly no one ever listened. Like usual, he quickly turned into his cocky self.
"Forget it. " Abruptly, he stopped pacing and knelt in front of her so they could look each other in the eye. Feeling him so close made her hold her breath. A dangerous smile curled his lips. "And really, I don't get whyyou of all people should act so outraged that I used 'forbidden' magic."
"Me 'of all people'?What's that supposed to mean?"
"You can play all innocent if you want-and you do a pretty good job-but I know the truth."
"What truth is that? " She couldn't hide her uneasiness from me or Christian.
He leaned even closer. "That you use compulsion.All the time."
"No, I don't, " she said immediately.
"Of course you do. I've been lying awake at night, trying to figure out how in the world you two were able to rent out a place and go to high school without anyone ever wanting to meet your parents. Then I figured it out. You had to be using compulsion. That's probably how you broke out of here in the first place."
"I see. You just figured it out.Without any proof."
"I've got all the proof I need, just from watching you."
"You've been watching me-spying on me-to prove I'm using compulsion?"
He shrugged. "No. Actually, I've been watching you just because I like it. The compulsion thing was a bonus. I saw you use it the other day to get an extension on that math assignment. And you used it on Ms. Carmack when she wanted to make you go through more testing."
"So you assumeit's compulsion? Maybe I'm just really good at convincing people. " There was a defiant note in her voice: understandable, considering her fear and anger. Only she delivered it with a toss of her hair which-if I didn't know any better-might have been considered flirtatious. And I did know better…right? Suddenly, I wasn't sure.
He went on, but something in his eyes told me he'd noticed the hair, that he always noticed everything about her. "People get these goofy looks on their faces when you talk to them. And not just any people-you're able to do it to Moroi.Probably dhampirs, too. Nowthat's crazy. I didn't even know that was possible. You're some kind of superstar.Some kind of evil, compulsion-abusing superstar. " It was an accusation, but his tone and presence radiated the same flirtatiousness she had.
Lisa didn't know what to say. He was right. Everything he'd said was right. Her compulsion was what had allowed us to dodge authority and get along in the world without adult help. It was what had allowed us to convince the bank to let her tap into her inheritance.
And it was considered every bit as wrong as using magic as a weapon. Why not? Itwas a weapon.A powerful one, one that could be abused very easily. Moroi children had it drilled into them from an early age that compulsion was very, very wrong. No one was taught to use it, though every Moroi technically had the ability. Lisa had just sort of stumbled into it- deeply-and, as Christian had pointed out, she could wield it over Moroi, as well as humans and dhampirs.
"What are you going to do then? " she asked. "You goingto turn me in?"
He shook his head and smiled. "No. I think it's hot."
She stared, eyes widening and heart racing. Something about the shape of his lips intrigued her. "Rose thinks you're dangerous, " she blurted out nervously. "She thinks you might have killed the fox."
I didn't know how I felt about being dragged into this bizarre conversation. Some people were scared of me. Maybe he was too.
Judging from the amusement in his voice when he spoke, it appeared he wasn't. "People think I'm unstable, but I tell you, Rose is ten times worse. Of course, that makes it harder for people to fuck with you, so I'm all for it. " Leaning back on his heels, he finally broke the intimate space between them. "And I sure as hell didn't dothat. Find out who did, though…and what I did to Ralf won't seem like anything."
His gallant offer of creepy vengeance didn't exactly reassure Lisa…but it did thrill her a little. "I don't want you doing anything like that. And I still don't know who did it."
He leaned back toward her and caught her wrists in his hands. He started to say something, then stopped and looked down in surprise, running his thumbs over faint, barely there scars. Looking back up at her, he had a strange-for him- kindness in his face.
"You might not know who did it. But you know something. Something you aren't talking about."
She stared at him, a swirl of emotions playing in her chest. "You can't know all my secrets, " she murmured.
He glanced back down at her wrists and then released them, that dry smile of his back on his face. "No. I guess not."
A feeling of peace settled over her, a feeling I thought only I could bring. Returning to my own head and my room, I sat on the floor staring at my math book. Then, for reasons I didn't really get, I slammed it shut and threw it against the wall.
I spent the rest of the night brooding until the time I was supposed to meet Jesse came around. Slipping downstairs, I went into the kitchen-a place I could visit so long as I kept things brief-and caught his eye when I cut through the main visiting area.
Moving past him, I paused and whispered, "There's a lounge on the fourth floor that nobody uses. Take the stairs on the other side of the bathrooms and meet me there in five minutes. The lock on the door is broken."
He compliedto the second, and we found the lounge dark, dusty, and deserted. The drop in guardian numbers over the years meant a lot of the dorm stayed empty, a sad sign for Moroi society but terribly convenient right now.
He sat down on the couch, and I lay back on it, putting my feet in his lap. I was still annoyed after Lisa and Christian's bizarre attic romance and wanted nothing more than to forget about it for a while.
"You really here to study, or was it just an excuse? " I asked.
"No. It was real.Had to do an assignment with Meredith. " The tone in his voice indicated he wasn't happy about that.
«Oooh,» I teased. "Is working with a dhampir beneath your royal blood? Should I be offended?"
He smiled, showing a mouth full of perfect white teeth and fangs. "You're a lot hotter than she is."
"Glad I make the cut. " There was a sort of a heat in his eyes that was turning me on, as was his hand sliding up my leg. But I needed to do something first. It was time for some vengeance. "Mia must too, since you guys let her hang out with you. She's notroyal."
His finger playfully poked me in the calf. "She's with Aaron. And I've got lots of friends who aren'troyal.
And friends who are dhamps. I'm not a total asshole."
"Yeah, but did you know her parents are practically custodians for the Drozdovs?"
The hand on my leg stopped. I'd exaggerated, but he was a sucker for gossip-and he was notorious for spreading it.
"Seriously?"
"Yeah.Scrubbing floors and stuff like that."
"Huh."
I could see the wheels turning in his dark blue eyes and had to hide a smile. The seed was planted.
Sitting up, I moved closer to him and draped a leg over his lap. I wrapped my arms around him, and without further delay, thoughts of Mia disappeared as his testosterone kicked in. He kissed me eagerly-sloppily, even-pushing me against the back of the couch, and I relaxed into what had to be the first enjoyable physical activity I'd had in weeks.
We kissed like that for a long time, and I didn't stop him when he pulled off my shirt.
"I'm not having sex, " I warned between kisses. I had no intention of losing my virginity on a couch in a lounge.