There was no choice but to accept her fate.
She’d made the decisions to bring her to this point in time.
Damn it. Damn him.
At that point it was only about hurt and despair, loss and fury. She wasn’t in control anymore, left to the mercy of the man she wanted to pummel. He would reduce her to nothing. Even worse? With a bit of praise or sweetness she’d let him. What good was immortality if it left her so weak? What was the point of living if this was all she had to look forward to?
The walls fell away, leaving her naked and painfully aware of herself.
He could see her now—scarred, battered and bruised.
Who gives a shit? He doesn’t care. Why should you?
“Hate you,” she breathed, pumping her fist into his chest, trying to convince herself it was true. “So much.”
“I know.” Trey didn’t fight, accepting each slam of her knuckles into his hard pectorals. “I don’t blame you. Let it out. Let it go.”
Let it go?
All the pain she’d locked up unleashed, her misery swinging wide open. Her knuckles ached, the muscles in her arms felt heavy as she tried to lift them. She kept swinging, breathing past the agony. Her target was the invisible phantom that kept her from finding any measure of happiness. The shadow of her heart offered a glimpse of what she wanted most only to take it away time and time again. Goddess, she couldn’t let him win. Not like this, due to her lack of emotional integrity. He’d taken too much. She couldn’t give him this too. Not if she expected to look at herself in the mirror. Her pride was on the line.
How could he respect her if she didn’t respect herself?
“I’m sorry. I wish you knew how much.” He caught her hands, holding them tenderly. She held her breath, trying to find the strength to pull away. “Turn all that hate into something else. You don’t have to be the strong one anymore. You don’t have to be afraid. I’m here. I’ll keep you safe. You have me.”
“Have you?” Anger, warm and welcome, revived her. Yanking free, she yelled, “How could I? I never had you.”
“You’ve always had me. I was too stupid to admit it.”
“You son of a bitch!”
She took another swing and he took her down, capturing her in his embrace, using his size and strength against her. She screamed, letting herself go, accepting the inevitable. He had her now. The fight was over. To make sure Leigh survived she had to surrender. Her life wasn’t the only one at stake. And—even if she loathed it—she wanted Trey. She always had.
He knew it too. He’d always known.
That was her ultimate degradation.
“How did I come to this?” Goddess, she sounded pitiful. “I’m a fool.”
“No you’re not.” He snaked his fingers into the hair at her nape. Pulling her head back, he forced her to look at him. “Don’t ever say that again.”
It was hard to see him now, her vision blurred by tears.
For a moment she thought she gleaned sympathy and dread in his expression.
“Foolish,” she repeated, running on empty.
“Never,” he rebuked her. “Never, Sadie.”
But she was. Eventually he’d know it as well.
She broke down, crumbling in on herself.
There was nowhere go. No safe place to run.
She’d finally hit rock bottom.
And it was all her fault.
It felt as though something unlatched in Trey’s chest. He watched Sadie’s face blaze triumphant in rage only to scatter to ashes in defeat. She cried, her tears like ragged blades ripping into his soul. He wanted to give her what she wanted but he didn’t know how. She’d said she hated him and he believed her.
Why shouldn’t she? He’d given her no reason not to.
“Let her cry it out.” Diskant emerged from the shadows. “It’s what she needs.”
“Is it?” Trey asked quietly, trying to hold his mate and figure out what the fuck to do. Diskant was one of his oldest friends and the Omega was mated. Perhaps he did understand. Needing some kind of answer, he started babbling, “I’ve failed her every single time she’s turned to me for something. I thought she’d understand how important she is after I claimed her. I thought she would understand how I feel.”
“She’s a woman,” Diskant replied as though it explained everything. “They’re prone to mood swings. Trust me.” He stepped into the light, a scowl on his face. “I know what Ava did. I understand her reasoning, even if her actions were harsh. I came to apologize.” He looked at Sadie, furrowing his brows. “I think it’s a bit too late for that.”
Trey felt like lashing out but kept his temper in check. “She told you what she did?”
“Not exactly,” Diskant answered and peered over his shoulder. After a moment, his attention returned to Sadie. “The connection I have with Ava… It’s changed.”
For the first time Diskant was revealing what Trey suspected—that Ava and Diskant communicated in some telepathic form. They’d tried to hide it but Trey was around them too much not to notice. Everyone knew Ava could hear the thoughts of humans. Many suspected she could enter the minds of shifters too. Now Trey knew for certain. Ava had a powerful ability. No wonder Diskant always knew so much. He remembered her telling Diskant she’d been listening to Sadie’s thoughts as they’d approached the house.
That was how she’d sensed their arrival.
She’d been eavesdropping.
“She told you what she was doing and you didn’t tell her to stop?”
“She didn’t tell me shit,” Diskant spat, angry. “The only reason I’m sharing this is your mate is the same. We’re both in the same fucking boat.” He huffed, shuffling his feet. “Ava doesn’t know her mental shields have weakened in the last few weeks. I can hear her even when she tries to block me out.” His jaw clenched, shoulders tense. He studied Sadie differently, glowing yellow eyes combing over her form. “I didn’t know you’d be paying us a visit. When your mate is in better shape we’ll have to find out how much she knows about Ava. We need to understand what’s going on.”
“You think she’ll tell you? Now? After what Ava’s done?” A growl crept up Trey’s throat. “If Sadie knew what Ava had planned do you honestly think she’d have left Leigh here? Do you truly believe she’d have come to us and not taken the woman somewhere else? Ava just fucked everything sideways. She’s done damage that might not be repairable.”
“Ava didn’t want to confront the woman,” Diskant chided. “Not until she broke down a second time.” Diskant’s vibrant gaze swept to Trey. “Not cool, by the way.”
“Not cool? Are you serious? You’re coming at me with not fucking cool?” Trey cracked his neck, trying not to succumb to the fury of his wolf. “I’ll tell you what’s not cool. Your female threatened a woman she promised to welcome to her home. She threatened Leigh and gave her no way out. How’d you think Sadie would react? My female isn’t a weak-minded bitch. She doesn’t want to rock a jock or whine for attention. She’s a fighter. Ava lit a match that started a fucking fire.”
“Be that as it may, we’ve got shit to sort.” Diskant shifted his weight, taking a step closer. “You’re in no frame of mind to think through things clearly. Good thing you have me.”
“Oh fearless Yoda,” Trey snapped, broken as Sadie cried. “Guide me.”
Show me the fucking way, you son of a bitch.
Ava had fucked things up in the most colossal way. Before her interference things had been peachy keen. Leigh had lost it but Sadie could have calmed the vampire down. Now? Trey knew he was fucked, fucked and fucked. Sadie hated him. She’d said so very clearly. All of her hurt and pain had come at him hard and fast, the impact slamming into him full force.