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“It’s got to be good. We’ve got to find something they can’t argue with. Some sort of proof, hard proof, that these life-forms exist,” Cal grumbled, thumping his head against the cushion. “I guess if we fail we can make some good money on the basic cable circuit, right?”

“They’d probably give you your own show.” She joked, but he was right. They had to convince people who stubbornly didn’t want to believe.

Cal let out a frustrated breath. “If only we had someone who could substantiate your story. Someone else who came back from the mission.”

“One more reason being a sole survivor sucks.”

Cal laughed, startled. “I bet that’s a long list.”

She hadn’t meant it as a joke, but she laughed with him. “Yeah. Yeah, it really is.”

“Right, so no one to back up your story. Too bad.”

“Yeah, no one’s exactly been in my shoes before—” Wait. Catherine stopped herself. You don’t want to end up like Commander Addy. I don’t want to see that happen to you, Dr. Darzi warned her. What had Addy seen on her own trip through ERB Prime? What had she heard? “Cal… what about Commander Addy?”

“Addy… she didn’t go to TRAPPIST, though—” His eyes lit up. “But she did go through the wormhole.”

“And every time I started pushing for the truth, my therapist used her as a cautionary tale.”

“Yeah, but that’s because when she came back, she returned with some pretty wild stories, apparently.” Cal broke into a smile and planted a loud, sudden kiss on Catherine’s cheek. “And the same strange antibodies you have! Colonel Wells, you are a certified mad genius. If we could track her down, you two could compare stories.”

“How are we going to do that?”

“I have some ideas. Worst case, we find her and go see her. You up for a possible road trip?” Cal was the one who looked like a mad genius now, a wild grin on his face.

“Let’s find our missing commander,” she said.

31

CATHERINE HADN’T THOUGHT Cal was serious about a road trip, but when attempts to reach Commander Addy via email and phone both failed, they started making plans. Cal was able to dig up an address for her, deep in the Arizona desert in a place so tiny it wasn’t even an actual town—just a general store and a stoplight.

They planned to take off for a weekend to track her down, flying to Phoenix and driving the rest of the way. Maybe nothing would come of it, but Catherine felt like they were doing something. Slowly, the feeling of being helpless, of being frozen, was falling away.

The night before they were due to leave she called Julie, so someone would know where she was going. She didn’t want to tell David. The fewer people at NASA who knew where she and Cal were going, the better.

“Wait,” Julie said after being quiet. “Who is this guy again?”

“Cal’s one of the guys working on Sagittarius II. We’ve got a lead on some information that might affect the current mission.”

“Are you sure you’re all right? I mean, this seems sudden after— well, you’ve been having a bad time lately.”

“I’m doing a lot better,” Catherine reassured her. “No more drinking. This trip—it’s a good thing, okay? It’s me taking positive steps.”

“But doesn’t it seem a little, I dunno—a little risky to you?” Julie was typing as she spoke. “Cal Morganson, you said?”

“Yeah. What do you mean, risky?”

“I mean, this guy you’ve literally never mentioned before suddenly wants you to go away with him to some remote place… and you’re being awfully closemouthed about why.”

Catherine laughed. “Are you saying you think he’s going to hurt me?”

“No, I just—oh.” Julie stopped typing and her tone changed. “Is there something I need to know about this guy?”

“Like what?”

“I don’t know. Are you sure this is just about business? What kind of ‘positive steps’ are you talking about?”

Catherine was too startled to answer at first. “What? Of course it’s business. Why wouldn’t it be?”

“ ’Cause I’m sitting here looking at a picture of Cal Morganson at NASA, and honey, you didn’t tell me he was pretty.”

“Cal?” Catherine laughed. “You think that me and Cal—no.” Pretty? She’d noticed that he was attractive, and he was a lot nicer than she’d originally thought, but… that was ridiculous. “He’s like, half my age or something.”

“Catherine Marie Wells, I am not looking at the face of a twenty-one-year-old right now. Sure he’s younger than you, but boy, wouldn’t that piss David off?”

“Julie.” Catherine paused, patiently. “I am not trying to piss David off. And Cal is just a guy I work with.” She laughed again, because honestly. “I can’t believe you looked him up.”

“Kiddo, I’ve been vetting your dates since you were sixteen. You think I’m gonna stop now?”

“Oh my God, stop. This is for work. Can we drop this?” The humor was rapidly diminishing, and Catherine couldn’t put a finger on why her discomfort was growing.

“Fine, fine. I’m just sayin’. You could do worse. But— I’m done. Subject changed. When are you coming back?”

“I don’t know for sure. It depends on what we find. Shouldn’t be more than a couple of days. I’ll have my cell phone, but we’re gonna be in the middle of nowhere, so I don’t know how good service will be.” Catherine paused. “Jules, don’t mention this to David, okay? I don’t want him to worry.”

“You realize that’s not making me feel any better about this.”

“I know, but just… trust me. Please?”

There was a long silence on the line, and then Julie said, “All right. I trust you. Take care of yourself. Call me as soon as you can.”

By the time she met Cal at the airport, Catherine was starting to have doubts of her own. It was ungodly early; the sun was barely up. What were they doing? What did they think they were going to find, talking to someone so thoroughly discredited at NASA that hardly anyone mentioned her name anymore?

Cal met her at the gate, and she almost didn’t recognize him, hiding behind a pair of sunglasses. Like her, he’d dressed casually in jeans. They looked like tourists, and Catherine had to repress the urge to laugh wildly. Somehow they’d both made the decision to look as unofficial and nongovernmental as possible.

“You made it,” he said. “I wondered if you’d change your mind.”

“I’m sorry, that’s not the correct code phrase. If you’re my contact, you should be saying something about the rain in Germany at this time of year.” Catherine sat next to him at the gate.

“…What?” The sunglasses came off and Cal looked at her closely.

Catherine gave in to the desire to laugh, which didn’t make Cal look less worried. “The sunglasses. You look like you’re trying to go incognito.”

Cal finally smiled, catching on. “Okay, it’s a little cloak-and-dagger. Aaron would kick my ass if he could see me right now.”

“He’d probably kick both our asses.” She paused. “And then fire us.”

“And maybe have us committed,” Cal added. They were serious until their eyes met, then they both burst out laughing.

* * *

The drive from Phoenix to Rough Rock was supposed to take five hours. Catherine drove the first leg. They listened to the radio for a while, with a little bit of conversation here and there, but by the time they switched driving duties, they’d left most of the radio signals far behind.

The rental car didn’t do a great job of keeping the road noise out after Catherine snapped off the radio. A dull rushing noise filled the silence as the desert went past Catherine’s window. It was bright and hot, the sky white-blue. Despite the rental’s air-conditioning, she could feel the heat baking through the glass.