I said, “I am so glad to see you like this… privately, dear Uncle William. It is so much easier to say thank you for my lovely earrings.”
He was warm and loving immediately. He did not mean to quarrel with me—only with Mama. He was really quite a cozy old gentleman and very sentimental. I saw the tears in his eyes, which was quite affecting.
“So you liked them, eh?” he said.
“They are lovely.”
“And your Aunt Adelaide's brooch? What about that?”
“Lovely too. I am lucky to have such a kind uncle and aunt.”
He patted my arm. “Good girl,” he said. “Nice girl. You're right, Adelaide. She's too good for that lot, eh?”
I could see that the thought of my mother and Sir John made him angry. Adelaide said quickly, “This is going to be a very happy evening. It was a good idea, don't you think, a juvenile ball?”
I said it was the nicest possible idea and Aunt Adelaide always had nice ideas.
That pleased Uncle William because he liked to hear the Queen praised.
“You are to open the ball with your cousin George.”
I knew she meant George Cambridge. The King and Queen were very fond of him, perhaps because he lived with them while his parents were out of the country. I had heard Mama say that they looked upon him as the son they couldn't get and that they had plans for him.
I knew what that meant…plans for marrying me. They wanted him to be Prince Consort. I did not think he could be King.
Mama said smugly, “They will have a nasty shock.”
In any case I was too happy to worry on that night about remote possibilities; and I prepared to enjoy the dance with George Cambridge.
I liked him very well. He was a charming boy and danced with grace. He told me I did too and he said it was a pity I did not come often to Aunt Adelaide's gatherings for the young. He also said I was pretty, which I liked to hear as often as possible because I had certain doubts about the matter myself. I was too plump for one thing. So it was always pleasant to hear compliments.
He told me that poor George Cumberland was going blind and his parents were very worried about him. I was very concerned for George Cumberland and saddened for a while. I could think of nothing worse than losing one's sight.
It was a pity Madame Bourdin had to be seated there watching every one of my steps to see if they were correct. It made it seem like a lesson, and dancing with George Cambridge I could have felt differently were it not for the presence of my dancing mistress.
The Queen brought several other partners for me and I had the impression that they all felt greatly honored to dance with me—which made me very amused and happy. She also took me in to supper and I sat between her and the King. I did not look in Mama's direction but I knew she was lowering because the King behaved as though she were not there and she thought she should be beside me taking all the honors as she did during our tours.
Toasts were drunk and there were quite a number to me, and the King lifted his glass and looked at me with a smile of affection that I returned. Aunt Adelaide was beaming on the other side of me and I thought how happy we could all be without these family troubles.
When we were driving back to Kensington Palace I knew that Mama was displeased. She said to Sir John, “It is easy to see what they are planning. And they are going to be disappointed.”
I knew she was referring to George Cambridge opening the ball with me. But I was too happy to care.
When I awoke next morning, I wrote in my journaclass="underline" “I was dancing at midnight. I was so amused.”
IT WAS A few days later when Mama told me that some cousins would be visiting us from Germany.
“You will find them charming boys,” said Mama, meaning that they would be far more pleasant than George Cambridge. “Your Uncle Leopold is delighted that they are coming and he says that you should get to know your German cousins.”
“I shall like that, Mama. It is always so interesting to meet cousins.”
“These are your Württemberg cousins. Your Uncle Leopold says that one day you must meet Ernest and Albert of Saxe-Coburg. I do believe they are his special favorites.”
“If they are Uncle Leopold's favorites, I daresay they will be mine.”
Mama smiled, for once pleased with me.
In due course the Württemberg cousins arrived—Ernest and Alexander. I was delighted with them. I liked the way in which they bowed over my hand and clicked their heels as they did so. So German! I thought. So enchanting! They were both tall and handsome and I found it hard to make up my mind which one I liked the better.
When the King and Queen heard that the Württemberg cousins were at Kensington, they decided to give a ball for them. I was very excited.
“You will love it,” I told the cousins. “Aunt Adelaide gives such wonderful balls.”
Mama grumbled and Sir John went to her apartments, I guessed to discuss the invitation. I was in a state of terror lest she find some excuse for refusing it, which I was sure she wanted to do if she dared.
I could not understand why she should be so anxious to keep our Württemberg relations to ourselves as I was quite proud of them.
Mama went about all that day and the next with tight lips and I thought she was on the point of saying I was to refuse the invitation to the ball, but she did not; and I was greatly relieved when it was time to leave and we set out in the carriage for St. James's. I was determined to enjoy it. To dance would be delightful. There would be George Cambridge as well as the Württembergs—and they would all want to dance with me. I should dance till midnight. Nothing could be more exciting than that.
When we arrived, the King, with the Queen beside him, received our guests, and I was kept at their side so that the guests could greet me with them. Mama tried to stand beside me but the King signed to Sir John to move on with her.
I saw Mama's face flush and her earrings quiver, and my heart sank. However we were safely here and nothing could be done about that now.
My feet were twitching with their longing to dance, but the King said to me very kindly, “I do not see as much of you as I should wish. The Queen wants to arrange some parties for you. There are people you should meet. There's your cousin—young George. He is here all the time. How do you like him, eh?”
I said I liked my cousin George very much.
He went on to tell me what a fine boy he was. “Just about the same age as you. Good for people of an age to be together.”
I said I was sure it was. The Queen smiled encouragingly at me and said she would be happy to arrange some balls for me because she knew I liked dancing so much—and singing too. I had such a pretty singing voice. We ought to have concerts. She would invite people… good singers. She had heard how much I liked the opera.
I spoke of my enthusiasm and they both smiled at me in the most kindly manner.
Then the Queen said, “I know Victoria is longing to dance. Are you not, my dear?”
“Let her dance with George,” said the King. “I like to see them dance together.”
Aunt Adelaide took my hand. “There is George. We will go to him.”
As we moved away Mama swept down on us. I knew by her face that something awful was going to happen.
“I have come to inform Your Majesty that I am leaving with my party. Come, Victoria.”
“But Mama,” I cried indignantly, “the dancing is only just starting.”
“Come along,” she replied sternly.
“But the dance is for your guests,” protested Aunt Adelaide.
“My guests are exhausted.”
“They… they look very well,” began Aunt Adelaide.