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“Oh excuse me I didn’t mean to interrupt you.” I said as I started to head back into the house.

“Nonsense Ellie darling, you could never interrupt us. Are you looking for Drew honey?”

I nodded my head and smiled.

“I believe he walked down to the barn a little bit ago. He was going to feed the horses.”

“Oh….okay great….um thanks I’ll go um track him down.” Why was I stammering over my words?

I headed down to the main stable and I heard voices. I turned the corner to see her…..leaning up against the barn and Gunner was leaning next to her with his arm resting up against a stall. She was smiling and laughing at something he said. I instantly had the same feelings I had when I came across Ryan. I just stood there. Finally Gunner looked up. He gave me that drop my panties crooked smile of his and dropped his arm and started to walk towards me. I was frozen. Why was he down here alone with this girl? I looked over at her and she was giving me a dirty look and then smiled a smirky smile at me.

I don’t know why I did it but I turned and walked away. “Ellie?” Gunner called for me. As soon as I turned the corner out of their view I took off running. I had no idea where the hell I was going but I was running as fast as I could.

“ELLIE STOP!” Gunner shouted. I knew I would never be able to out run him. FUCK! He runs every damn day. I ran up to the tank and had to put my hands on my knees and lean over.

OH SHIT…I needed to start working out again. I was trying to suck in air but my lungs felt like they were closed up.

“What the fuck Ellie? What are you doing running away like that?”

Have. To. Catch. My. Breath!

I stood up and tried to rub out the cramp I was now getting on my side. Holy fuck….I think I needed to start running……..okay maybe walking and then work my way up to running. Oh my god I was rambling my own fucking thoughts now.

Gunner walked up and pulled me around to look at him.

“What was that about? Why did you run off?”

Once I got my breath back I just let go. I was tired, cranky, stressed out from school, never seeing Gunner enough, sitting and having to watch endless girls swoon all over his ass….and now this. He is down in the barn looking like he was about to kiss some bleached blonde tight…oh fuck it……BITCH cowgirl.

“Oh I’m sorry Gunner. It’s just that it looked like you two needed a private moment to finish whatever it is you were about to start!”

“What? Ellie what are you talking about.”

“Go fuck yourself ok. You let me sleep in this morning so you could spend some time with tight jean wearing who ever the fuck she is bleached blonde. You sure looked cozy with each other. I would say her name but funny thing is you never introduced her to me yesterday….especially after she gave you a nice long good bye hug…….Fuck this.”

I started to walk away but fuck…I still had the cramp in my side. FUCK ME!

“Ellie don’t walk away from me. Stop for just one goddamn minute.”

“I’m going home.”

I watched as he threw his hands in his hair and then pulled them down over his face.

“Baby please stop…..I can’t do this Ellie. All we do is argue anymore and you keep getting pissed at me and I have no fucking clue as to why. So you saw me talking to Jess, she is Drake’s daughter. We all grew up together. Fuck she is like a little sister to me Ellie. I was not about to kiss her or do anything else with her for that matter. I love you! Damn it Ellie! Why can’t you see that I love you….I only want you.”

You wi ll never be wanted by anyone…….

“SHIT! When will her voice get out of my fucking head!”

“Who’s voice Ellie?”

I did it again. I turned around and saw the hurt in Gunner’s eyes. Why was I having such a trust issue with him lately? I really didn’t think they looked like they were about to kiss so why did I run off like that?

I felt sick to my stomach and just sat down and started to cry. Gunner was over and down on his knees in two seconds flat.

“ELLIE! What’s wrong? Do you feel sick?”

I just threw myself into him. He wrapped his arms around me and then sat down and brought me onto his lap. He was stoking my back and just kept saying it was alright. It wasn’t all right though.

“Gunner, I don’t know what’s wrong with me! I keep waiting for the floor to fall out from beneath me. I’m so tired of school already, I’m stressed out, my mother won’t stop calling me, you’re hardly ever around and when I do get to see you I have to watch girls throw themselves at you….I’m just waiting for you to get sick of me and leave.” I started sobbing.

“Sweetheart I’m so so sorry. I didn’t know your mom had been calling you. I wish you would have told me or Jeff. I know school is rough baby; you took way to many classes Ells. Football is almost over baby and we can be together more often. It’s all going to work out. You need to talk to me Ellie, we can’t keep fighting over little shit that means nothing okay?”

I nodded my head and looked up at him. His blue eyes caught mine and I sucked in a breath from the smoldering look he was giving me. He slowly started to pull me down and leaned me back on the grass and started to kiss me.

After I came back down to earth Gunner leaned in against my ear and whispered to me.

“Another first baby! Orgasm next to the tank.”

I let out a laugh and looked at his beautiful smile. Maybe everything really was going to be ok.

December……

“I cannot believe you’re getting married Amanda. What the fuck? Don’t you think this is a bit too soon?” Ari said for the fifth time since we picked Amanda up at her apartment.

“Ari, I’m madly in love with Brad and he is madly in love with me. We want to get married as soon as possible so no, I don’t think it is too soon.

“Y’all just got engaged just over two weeks ago for Christ sakes!” Ari said shaking her head.

Brad had asked Amanda to marry him on Thanksgiving right in front of his whole family. She of course said yes and they immediately started planning a Valentine’s Day wedding.  Classes were out for the semester and I finally felt like I could relax. When Amanda called and asked if we could go check out the Driskill Hotel we jumped at the chance to go and do something different.

Jeff was with Brad helping him fix something on his father’s boat and Gunner was planning on meeting his cousin Shannon’s fiancé James, who was flying in a day earlier than Shannon to catch up with Gunner. I guess Shannon and James were high school sweethearts and he went out to the ranch often. Gunner had not seen either of them in a few years. They were getting married that weekend.

“Okay ladies. So here is the drill. We’re going to look at two different ball rooms. I’m trying to keep this small but I have a feeling Brad’s mother is going to give me an invite list a mile long. So keep that in mind. I’m thinking no more than three hundred people.

“THREE HUNDRED PEOPLE!” Ari and I both said at the same time with equal amount of shock in our voices.

“I know…..I would like to keep it at one hundred fifty and that’s my goal but not sure the future monster in law feels the same way. So just keep reminding me that while we’re looking. You’re my bridesmaids…..this is your job.”

I had to giggle because Amanda was the type of girl who would have just ran off to Vegas to get married but Brad’s mother…..she was something else. It shouldn’t take her long to figure out that Amanda was not going to put up with her shit.

We toured a few different banquet halls and I knew Ari was just as bored as I was. I was in charge of note taking and I swear to god if Amanda says “Did you write that down Ellie?” one more fucking time to me I am going to jam the notebook up her ass!

ARGH, the dude giving us the tour was a stick in the mud..….he was an older gentleman and he just kept talking about servers, bartenders, chairs, linens, votive candles, china, silverware, flutes, dance floors….OH MY GOD! I couldn’t take it anymore! Ari had walked ahead and was peaking in the doors to the kitchen.