I knew I had to do this for Mom. I couldn’t abandon her. She needed me, and as my mom, she outranked everyone. I didn’t want this. I hated this. I would also never forgive Mom for this.
“I’m sorry, Mom. I don’t want to leave you. I was just trying to make it easier on you. I’ll go with you. I’ll get my stuff together.” My words may have come out of my mouth as calm, but the tears splashing my face were a definite sign of my pain and hurt. I couldn’t hold it back.
Mom wrapped her arms around me and whispered in my ear, “Thank you. You’ll see this will be for the best.”
I pulled away from her, nodded, and left for my room. I needed to escape. As soon as my feet kicked my door shut, my knees buckled, falling hard on the floor. The tears turned into sobs that I couldn’t hold back. This was not how my senior year of high school should play out. This was not what I wanted for my life.
Now it was time for me to reclaim what I needed: My friends … Grams … Deke.
My plan for the night was simple—dress sexy and dance my ass off. I was going to have fun with my best friends and see what the night brought. I would not fall all over him, even though I would love to do so.
I had no intentions of throwing myself at him or making a fool of myself. Chances were, he still hated my guts and wanted nothing to do with me. If that was the case, I would rather know from afar and not have my heart stomped on again.
“Turn it up!” Kinsley yelled from the hallway. Reaching over to my iPod dock, I cranked up Justin Timberlake singing about bringing sexy back.
“Here, let me,” Sawyer said, pulling the hairbrush out of my hand.
I smiled at her reflection in the mirror. “Thanks, what should I do with it?”
“You have beautiful hair, Vann. I say let it flow down your back. We’ll use the iron a bit to get the kinks out, but even the wave on you is beautiful.”
I’d recently gotten bangs that flowed gently to the side of my face and had a shit ton of layers put in. If anyone asked me what my best feature was, I would always say my hair. I loved it.
“You are going to have every guy begging for your attention tonight. Now let’s get you dressed.”
“What do you think?” I held up a short black skirt in one hand and short shorts one in the other.
“Skirt … definitely the skirt,” Kinsley said while dancing around the room.
“With what?”
Both Sawyer and Kinsley began ripping though my closet trying to find ‘the perfect top.’ I wasn’t sure I had that and was becoming a bit irritated they were throwing shit everywhere. “You know you’re picking all this up, right?” They just turned, smiled, and continued digging.
“This!” Kinsley yelled. She held in her hand my favorite plum top that had bling all around its plunging neckline. I had great cleavage in this shirt, not that I necessarily needed any help in that department.
“I love that shirt!” Sawyer’s voice came out, perky as ever.
“All the guys will be looking at your boobs.” Kinsley smirked.
“That’s the point of it, isn’t it?” I asked, pulling it on. It hugged my body like a glove. Adding my favorite black heels, I was ready.
“All right Vann, what’s really the game plan tonight? I know you want Deke, but he’s grown up and changed. You need to think before you act.” Sawyer spoke up, concerned. I knew she had reservations about me wanting Deke. Hell, I didn’t tell her, but so did I.
I’d admit that I was hoping a lot of what they’d told me about Deke’s ladies’ man status wasn’t true. I wasn’t going to be naïve, though, and pretend he hadn’t changed. Hell, look at me, I’d changed, too.
I was just going in with the knowledge that I wouldn’t sleep with him … at least not tonight. A smile crept across my face. I wanted that more than anything. My lonely nights were spent thinking of Deke.
“I’m gonna kiss you, Vann.” Deke’s thumb slowly grazed my bottom lip. His eyes piercing into mine, I wanted it, too, more than anything in the world.
“Okay,” I whispered.
His tentative lips slowly made their way to mine as if he thought at any minute I would pull away. Not a chance. Lightly, he brushed his lips against mine, pulling me closer to him. His lips caused fire to burn throughout my body, something I’d never felt before.
Gasping, his tongue lightly swept in my mouth. Nervousness hit me; I had never kissed a boy, let alone with tongue. Sensing my hesitancy, his tongue guided me, slowly moving back and forth against mine.
Soon, my tongue was doing the guiding as I felt my entire body embrace this wonderful feeling he was causing in me.
Pulling away, we were both breathless. “I’ve gotta go, Vann. I’ll see you tomorrow.”
My words must have been sucked out of me, because I couldn’t talk. I nodded, and he left me there on the dock of the lake.
Our first of many kisses, among other things, was the best kiss of my life. Then my mom uprooted me. Turning, I saw Saw and Kins staring at me. “What?”
“You were a million miles away there, girl. I’m really scared you will be disappointed.” Sawyer began twiddling her fingers, one of her nervous habits.
Reaching over, I placed my hand on hers. “It’s okay. Whatever happens … happens. I can handle it.” I tried to give her my most reassuring smile since I had no clue what the night would bring. I didn’t want my nervousness to show. Surely I was tougher than that.
The way I left hurt him. I knew that. He could still be harboring that, and I could get the brush off. Not to say that wouldn’t kill me, because it would, but I’d deal. “Come on, girls, let’s do this.”
3
Deke
“Keep going, sweetheart,” I forced out as she began to slow down. Tammy … Tina … Tracy … whoever the hell it was down on her knees in front of me was sucking my cock like a champ. Swirling the top, licking underneath, grabbing my balls and massaging, I was going to come, and the sooner the better.
I thread my fingers through her stringy ash-blonde hair, my fingers catching on the knots in it. Grabbing her head, I began really working her mouth, pulling my dick in and out. I ignored the gagging sound she made when my dick touched the back of her throat. She was going to have to get the fuck over it.
I grunted as my release poured out of me.
I pulled out as she looked up at me. “Was that good?” she asked as she wiped the remnants of me from her mouth.
“Great. Gotta get going now.” I never wanted them to stick around—get clingy—especially here at the bar. Who was I kidding? All women did was leave you. Eventually. Best to push them out first so that didn’t happen.
“What about later? Can we get together?” she asked, sounding hopeful.
I helped her to her feet. “No, sweetheart. Thanks, though; I needed that.”
Tammy, Tina, Tracy … whoever … gave me a glare. “No, I didn’t get mine.”
“And you won’t. Go on, get out of here.” I gently pulled her to the door and guided her out. She didn’t put up much protest. She knew the score. She was the one dumb enough to come back to my office and blow me. Women, they were all the same. They’d do anything to get what they wanted, then they’d leave. Fuck ‘em. Whatever. I could do the same shit.