How earnestly did she then wish that her former opinions had been more reasonable, her expressions more moderate! “There was a time when I would have said so, but for some time I have felt… quite differently.”
“Or in other words, you are determined to have him. He is rich, to be sure, and you may have more fine clothes and fine carriages than Jane. But will they make you happy?”
“I would marry him if he hadn’t a penny, and, while I would prefer to marry him with your blessing, the lack of it will not stop me.”
He observed her silently for a few moments. “Well, Lizzy, I confess you have truly surprised me. I cannot think of any man of our acquaintance who I would consider a less likely candidate to win your affections.”
“Nonetheless, that is the situation.”
“I see.” He paused. “May I ask who else may be aware of this?”
“The Gardiners have known for some time, and more recently, Jane and Bingley. Miss Darcy as well, of course.”
“You told the Gardiners, and they said nothing of it to me?” he said with deceptive mildness.
“It was more a matter of their discovering it than being told,” she said, smiling slightly at the memory. “And, if I am not mistaken, Mr. Gardiner tried to say something of it to you, but you disbelieved him.”
“So I did,” he said thoughtfully. “Well, Lizzy, what would you have me do?”
She sighed in relief at this attempt to meet her halfway. “I would ask that you try to get to know him, with an open mind, remembering much of your unfortunate impression of him is based on Wickham’s lies.”
“That seems a fair enough request. What do you plan to tell your mother?”
“Nothing,” Elizabeth responded with heartfelt sentiment. “Not until I have to.”
Mr. Bennet gave an ironic smile. “Well, I shall keep this matter between the two of us until you tell me otherwise. Lizzy, you have given me a great deal to think about, and perhaps we can discuss this further when I have had the opportunity to do so.”
“I would like that,” she said, turning to leave.
“And Lizzy? I’m glad that you told me.”
Elizabeth, with a strong sense of relief, said, “So am I.”
Chapter 7
Elizabeth, her anxiety much reduced following her discussion with Mr. Bennet, found herself over the next few days doing nothing so much as waiting for Darcy’s return. She walked out with Georgiana on occasion, showing her the sights of Meryton and its vicinity, helped with wedding preparations, calmed her excitable mother, and otherwise seemed full of activity, but her thoughts had only one goal.
She spent less time with her guest than she would have expected, since Georgiana quickly formed an alliance with Mary and Kitty. Elizabeth was fascinated to observe the interactions between the three very diverse young women. Kitty was much taken with Georgiana’s graceful ways, and set to imitating them as assiduously as she ever had Lydia’s wildness, while Georgiana seemed drawn into some of Kitty’s liveliness. Mary, finding Georgiana respectful of her accomplishments, and, much to her surprise, not above asking for her assistance and advice with her music, seemed to feel more confident of herself; and while the younger girl was more than happy to spend hours reading with Mary, she pushed hard for reading poetry and novels over sermons. Elizabeth doubted the efficacy of this until she came across Mary reading a romantic novel one day, which Mary defensively informed her was one that Georgiana had praised. Mary found it hard to ignore when Kitty and Georgiana went off into long discussions on fashions and hairstyles, and eventually was pressed into developing some small interest in the topic herself so as not to be left out, causing the other two to coax her into making some small, but flattering, changes in her hair and manner of dress.
Elizabeth, pleased to hear the constant conversations, laughing and romping between the three, on occasion found herself feeling more like an aunt than an elder sister. It seemed likely to her that Georgiana’s previous shy and quiet behavior might have been related to being always surrounded by persons much older than herself, and to her constant awareness of her complicity in the Ramsgate affair.
She also suspected, based on a certain amount of giggling apparently directed toward her, that keeping secrecy became too difficult for Georgiana, and that her sisters had been let in on the news of Darcy’s interest in her as well. Mr. Bennet had turned out to have very little to say on the subject of Darcy after their late-night talk, beyond once asking Elizabeth when she had come to change her opinion of him.
One day, some five days before Darcy was expected—as Elizabeth kept track of time—Mary, Kitty, and Georgiana walked out to Meryton. Mrs. Bennet visited Mrs. Philips, leaving Elizabeth with time enough to enjoy the unseasonable warmth of the day by collecting fall fruits from the garden for a centerpiece. She found herself particularly taking pleasure in the quiet of the gardens, knowing Jane and the Gardiner family would be arriving from London on the following day, and she could expect little more peace until after the wedding. Allowing herself to luxuriate in the feeling of the sun on her shoulders and the gentle breeze, she was sublimely unaware of the presence of an interested observer.
Darcy found himself captivated by the image of Elizabeth, the sunlight gilding her hair, as she passed gracefully from the small orchard into the vineyard. He watched with longing the dance of her precise, calm movements as she clipped clusters of grapes, allowing them to drop gently without bruising into her waiting hand, then transferring them to the basket. Her exposed neck as she bent over seemed to beg for his kisses, and he controlled himself only by gripping the trellis beside him with sufficient force to cause his hand to ache.
Finally he brought himself to speak her name. He saw her become still at the unexpected sound of his voice, then she turned to face him, her eyes alight, wreaking havoc with his every intention of composure.
Elizabeth, taken unawares, felt a not unpleasant sense of agitation. “Mr. Darcy,” she said. “This is a most pleasant surprise.”
“Not ‘Mr. Darcy,’ Elizabeth. Not to you.”
Elizabeth felt breathless. “Fitzwilliam,” she said softly, feeling both shy and extraordinarily alive.
He willed his hands to stay still. Mesmerized by the sparkle in her fine eyes, he could find no words to express the eagerness he felt just being near her. She took his breath away.
As the silence drew on, her mouth twitched in amusement. “Perhaps we should begin this conversation anew, sir. I could say, ‘Why, I did not expect you for some days yet,’ to which you could reply with an acknowledgement of your change in plans; I could inquire about your journey, and you might ask about the well-being of your sister.”
Amused, he decided that two could play at this game. “Then, perhaps, you could report to me about the success of her visit, and I could tell you just how long I have been waiting and hoping to have you greet me with just that look in your eyes, how even last year when you stayed at Netherfield, I would watch when your eyes would light up with pleasure, and wish most fervently such a look could be for me.”
“Even then? I thought you watched me only with intent to find fault.”
“To find fault? I cannot imagine why; I would have thought it obvious I watched you because it gave me the greatest of pleasure.”
Elizabeth laughed. “My aunt Gardiner says you and I have a talent for misconstruing each other. I am glad to see we are both improving in our understanding.”
“As long as I am not misconstruing my welcome, I am quite content.” How was he to keep from touching her when she looked so beguiling? It was hopeless. He reached out and caught her hand, but instead of providing relief, her touch merely increased his desire.