Safe.
He dropped his head, pressing his brow to hers. He was watching every movement, every expression that flickered across her face, and she let him have them all.
He lowered his arm to brush her jaw. “Come on, beautiful.”
And it was too intimate, too much for any situation, much less for having sex up against a wall. But it was that echoing beautiful in the hot ocean air, the quiet, claiming kiss he laid upon her mouth while his thrusts met just the perfect place inside her—
Her vision whited out when she came, and he followed right after, spilling out a groan that was only her name.
Through it all, through the shudders of pleasure and the sudden slackness that came after climax, he never relaxed his grip. He took her weight and held her up.
And what was more, she let him.
Absently running his fingers through Jo’s hair, Adam stared out the window of the van at the dim silhouettes of palm trees passing by. He was surrounded by faint strains of music and hushed laughter, all muted by the rushing of cool, wet air flowing in through the open windows. Above the tree line, the stars were just beginning to rise.
It had been a good day. Maybe one of the best.
He glanced down at Jo. The edges of her face were cast in the glow from her book light, and sure, maybe she was spending the trip with her nose buried in her work, but she was choosing to do it with her shoulder tucked under his arm, her whole side pressed against him.
It was a stark contrast to the distance she’d kept from him earlier in the day, refusing to even sit near him with their advisors watching on. He didn’t know what had changed her mind. Only that Heather had sat down beside her on the beach, and after that, she’d stood with this intentness to her gaze. She’d let him kiss her in front of everyone, had practically asked him to take her down the beach and then to take her. His sex life in the past had been fulfilling enough, but he’d never been so overcome like that, so wanton.
God. His heart squeezed, just thinking about the way they’d connected there beneath the pier. She’d been so gorgeous and unselfconscious, wet suit stuck to her breasts, her arms and legs wrapped around him, consuming him as he’d lost his mind, staring into her eyes and pressing into her, deep inside where she was warm and perfect and accepting. Holding on to him exactly the way he wanted to be held, making him feel strong and wanted and… well.
She might not love him yet. She might not ever. But he wasn’t going to kid himself about the warm rush he felt every time he looked at her, the cracking feeling in his ribs with every step she made to meet him in the middle. Every additional inch she let him in.
And she’d let him get so far today. Not just the kissing and the hand-holding and the sex. Even after they’d reassembled themselves, she’d stayed more or less by his side the rest of the afternoon. At dinner, she’d gone so far as to laugh a little, talking to their friends. With her cheeks flushed from the sun and the better part of a margarita, she’d looked so open. Still fierce as anything, but looser somehow. Less hidden within a suit of armor and more letting people see behind the plates.
If the smirk Jared had shot him as they’d piled into the van was anything to go by, Adam wasn’t the only one seeing the change. Wasn’t the only one who thought it was a good thing.
He glanced back down at her, expecting to see that little wrinkle in her brow she got when she was particularly absorbed. But instead… His breath caught in his throat. Her head, which had already been resting against his arm for the better part of the ride, had lolled to the side. Her mouth was slack, her eyes closed.
It was the first time he’d ever seen her asleep.
The warmth behind his ribs grew and grew.
Taking care not to jostle her, he reached over and shut off her reading light. He wrapped his arms around her more securely.
He wasn’t inclined to count his chickens, but he resolved it there and then. Tonight would be the night he’d get her to stay with him. Clearly, the cat was out of the bag. There was no more reason to hide. She’d sleep in his bed, maybe after another slower, quieter round, and in the morning he’d kiss her awake. Bring her coffee and make her breakfast and simply… care for her.
Love her.
It ached, just thinking the words. But if he wasn’t fooling himself about the other things, there wasn’t any point denying this one. It was stupid, probably the most idiotic thing he’d ever done. At the end of the summer, it was going to hurt like nothing else.
Unless he could convince her to love him back. To keep this fire they’d kindled alive, this summer spark that could grow into a warmth that could last them all winter long. Even apart.
The whole rest of the drive, Jo slept peacefully against his side. It wasn’t until the van came to a stop outside their houses and the lights came on that she stirred. She jerked away from his shoulder, twitching a hand up to swipe at the corner of her mouth and then at her eyes. As everyone else started to clamber out, she looked around, confused. “Are we here already?”
Her eyes were wide, her mouth sleep-soft, and her voice hoarse. And it struck him square in the chest. This is what she would look and sound like, every morning, waking up in his bed.
And in that moment, he loved her so fiercely it burned.
“Yeah,” he said. His voice hitched on the word, and she looked at him strangely. A lick of panic curled inside him. What if she saw? She wasn’t ready yet, and she’d…
She’d end it, wouldn’t she? If she knew?
“Oh.” She glanced away, toward the front of the van, as if he hadn’t said anything at all. She’d missed the feelings he had written all over him. It was a relief, and at the same time, it almost made him feel worse. Raking her fingers through her hair, she called out, “Are you taking the van back to the observatory?”
In the driver’s seat, Heather tipped her head to look at them in the rearview mirror. “Yeah. Why?”
“Can you drop me off there?” Jo asked.
Heather scrunched up her brow. “Now?” Adam was thinking the same thing.
Jo nodded. “I just need to check some things real quick.”
Shrugging, Heather said, “Sure, I guess.”
“Awesome.” Jo turned to Adam and shifted as if to move out of his way so he could get out.
Nope. No chance. He had less than zero interest in stopping at the office now, at eight o’clock on a Saturday night after a day at the beach, but if he let Jo go, his chances of coaxing her to his room declined exponentially. He cleared his throat. “I’ll go with you.”
Heather’s mouth twisted up into a too-knowing smile, but Adam wasn’t focused on that. Jo turned to him. “Really?”
“Sure.” He didn’t have to explain what he’d be doing there. Chances were he’d mostly be following her around, trying to keep her from staying too late. “Why not?”
“I can only think of about a million reasons.”
So could he. He kept them to himself.
Once everyone else had cleared out, more than a couple of them shaking their heads at him, he and Jo hopped up to sit closer to the front for the quick drive to the observatory. Heather and Lisa were nice enough to drop them in front of the office building instead of making them hike in from the back lot where the van usually got parked.
“Have fun,” Lisa told them as they got out.
Heather winked. “But not too much fun.”
“Ha-ha,” Jo said, desert dry, and Adam marveled again that she was having such an easy time joking about it now.
He kept his peace, walking alongside her halfway down the empty hall. Until finally he couldn’t contain it anymore. “What happened?”
“Hmm?”
“You were so worried about everybody finding out, or thinking less of you. Then today, you suddenly decide you don’t care?”
“Why? Do you care?”