I knew that to have a child of my own would be the greatest happiness I could hope for.
There was something strange about that afternoon. Was it a premonition? I wondered afterwards; but from the moment I had entered the woods I had been aware of something… I was not sure what. It was a certain uneasiness. I had felt it before… in Enderby particularly… as though I were being watched, that I was menaced in some way. The servants had said it was the ghost in Enderby, but were there ghosts in the woods?
Little sounds made me start; a crackle in the undergrowth, the displacement of a stone, a sudden rustling. It was probably a squirrel getting his hoard ready for the winter; perhaps a rabbit or a weasel or a stoat scuttling through the foliage; the breeze making moaning sounds as it moved among the branches of the trees. They were the natural sounds of the wood which, but for the unusual nature of my mood, would have gone unnoticed.
When I came to the clearing the strangeness passed and peace descended upon me. I sat there under the oak, thinking of my baby. This time next year you’ll be here, my little one, I thought. And how I longed for the waiting to be over.
And then… there it was again. I was not alone. I knew it.
I turned my head sharply. I thought I saw a dark shadow darting among the trees… scarcely a human being… a shape.
I sat very still peering into the wood. I could see nothing.
I had imagined it, of course. I turned away. And then… there it was again… the sound of a footfall, the eerie certainty that something was menacing me… something evil.
I must get back to the house. To do so I had to go through the woods and suddenly I was afraid of what might be lurking there. There was no other way, though. It was absurd to be afraid of those familiar trees which I loved.
I had let my imagination run on. Sabrina, I thought, you are responsible for this!
I was getting a little cumbersome and not able to get nimbly to my feet, and as I attempted to do so there was a movement from behind. I turned. Something struck me on the back of my head. I had fallen to the ground. I was not sure what happened then. I think I must have lost consciousness for a moment or so, before a terrible realization came sweeping over me that Sabrina had been right. Someone wanted me out of the way and here I was in the woods, alone and helpless.
It could only have been for a few seconds that I had lost consciousness. I was aware now that I was being dragged across the grass. I could smell the scent of earth; the grass brushed my hands; I had returned, from blankness to horror and a fearful understanding of what was happening to me.
I was being dragged towards the dene hole.
I could not see who my assailant was. It appeared to be a dark, cloaked figure… man or woman, I was not sure. I was lying face downwards on the ground and I could not see who was looming over me. I could feel my head beginning to throb and I knew that death was staring me in the face.
Sabrina… oh, Sabrina… I was thinking. You were right after all.
I had stepped into a nightmare. I was going to be taken to the dark pit and then… I should disappear.
Suddenly I heard a voice; ‘Clarissa! Clarissa!’
Everything seemed to stand still. Time itself. But the voice I heard was that of Sabrina. I thought I must be dreaming. It was the last moments of consciousness before death took me; and it was significant that it should be Sabrina of whom I was thinking.
Sudden silence. What had happened? I knew I was still above the earth; vaguely I could see the light; I could smell and feel the grass beneath me.
I tried to rise. I heard Sabrina’s voice again. ‘Stop. Stop. What are you doing to Clarissa?’
Then she was close to me, kneeling over me. I could see her face hazily through the mists which seemed to be settling over my eyes.
‘Clarissa… oh dear, dear Clarissa. Are you all right? You’re not dead, are you?’
‘Sabrina.’
‘Yes, I came. Buttermilk was in a bad mood today. He wouldn’t jump. Job said leave him. He’s touchy today. So I did and I came here to find you… and talk. Then I heard you call out and I saw… I saw…’
‘What did you see?’ I was fighting the desire to slip back into unconsciousness. ‘Sabrina… Sabrina… what did you see?’
‘Someone… was pulling you across the grass.’
‘Who was it? Who?’
I was waiting for her to tell me. It seemed like a very long pause. I was praying, I think. Oh God, let it not have been Lance.
‘I didn’t know. It was the disguise. A long cloak and a hood over its face. It could have been anyone.’
‘Oh, Sabrina, whoever it was was going to kill me. I felt the strangeness as I came into the woods today… something evil… lurking there.’
‘Yes,’ said Sabrina, ‘yes. I ought to get you back to the house. Can you walk?’
‘I think so.’
‘We ought to get someone to carry you. I can’t go away and leave you, though. It might come back.’
I was sitting up leaning against her and she had her arm protectively round me.
‘Oh Sabrina,’ I said, ‘it was… horrible.’
‘It was attempted murder,’ she answered. ‘If I hadn’t been here they would have killed you.’
‘You saved my life. I am sure of it. I know what it was going to do—take me to the dene hole.’ Sabrina was shivering.
‘I knew I had to save you,’ she said. ‘I knew it.’
We clung together for a moment. Then I said: ‘We must get back. If whatever it is comes back…’
‘I’d kill it,’ said Sabrina.
‘Help me up.’
She did. My head was swimming and I could feel a large bump coming up. I felt I was going to faint.
Then I thought with alarm of my baby. I felt it move within me and for a moment I felt exultant. I had greatly feared it might have suffered from the assault.
Sabrina put her arm round me and although she was only a girl of ten I felt safe and secure with her beside me.
I took a few tottering steps towards the trees.
‘It’s not really far,’ said Sabrina. ‘Can you do it, dear Clarissa?’
I said I could and I would.
As we came within sight of the house I saw Lance. He was on his way to the stables. When he saw us he stopped and stared.
‘Clarissa! Sabrina! What’s happened?’ he cried. He had run to us and as I looked at his kindly, handsome face, so full of concern, I was ashamed of myself for thinking for a moment that he could wish me harm, let alone do me any.
I said: ‘I was attacked in the woods.’
‘Good God! Are you all right?’
‘I’m very shaken… and I can feel a bump on my head. I think Sabrina has saved my life.’
It was as though a radiance had settled on Sabrina. She smiled and nodded. Then she said excitedly: ‘Something told me to go into the woods and save Clarissa. I came just in time. I saw this man… or whatever it was… all dressed in a cloak like a monk’s… and there was Clarissa on the ground. It was dragging her along to the dene hole.’
‘What are you talking about?’ demanded Lance.
‘It’s true,’ I said. ‘Someone did attack me. It didn’t seem like robbery. I was being dragged across the ground and I can only think it was to the dene hole.’
‘It sounds mad. But let’s get you in.’ He picked me up in his arms, and the tenderness in his face touched me deeply.
As we entered the hall Madame Legrand was coming down the stairs’.