“There is no guarantee of a field agent’s safety. We knew that when we signed up,” Lester informed me dispassionately.
Mungo’s ears perked up and she crept along the lip of the dumpster to come closer to her companion. “But, Les, what about that time you—”
“Enough!” he yowled in warning.
“Remember, you were patrolling with Percy when he got taken, and—Ahhhh!” Mungo’s words were replaced by a giant scream when Lester took a swipe at her and knocked her back into the dumpster.
Wouldn’t you know it? I was just about to give up on this pair when they revealed this back-alley conversation might not be such a waste of time, anyway. Clearly, Lester didn’t want to talk to me, but if I kept trying, the other cat might just tell me in his stead.
“What was she saying about Percy? Was he abducted? Did you see anything that might lead us to who took him?” I asked, keeping my voice calm, as if I weren’t dying to know the answer so I could complete this case and go home to my poor neglected shower stall.
Lester flattened his ears back against his head.“We’re done here.”
But then Mungo pulled herself back onto the dumpster with an oof.“But, Les, what if this human can help us? I don’t want to get catnapped like Percy.”
“No one’s going to take you. No one would want to,” he spat.
“Oh, like a day with you is such a walk in the park!” Mungo reared up and attempted to take a swipe at Lester but lost her balance and fell into the dumpster again.
“Really,” I pleaded. “I just want to help.”
Lester’s voice grew deeper, his tone more threatening. “Then go away and leave cats’ business to cats.”
“But Mr. Fluffikins sent her,” Mungo called from inside the dumpster. “Won’t he be angry if we don’t tell her what we know?”
Her argument made, the fat calico hopped out of the dumpster, bypassing the rim and landing beside me on the asphalt.
The silver Maine Coon groaned.“If a broken clock can be right two times per day, I guess you can be, too, Mungo.”
“Yup!” The other cat now sat straight and proud, thrusting her nose into the air as she danced happily on her front paws. “Now tell her about Percy.”
“Not so fast.” Lester jumped down to join us. A new mischief lit in his eyes, telling me it would require much more work to get a straight answer out of these two.
Sure enough, he flopped over onto his side and whined,“If you want me to talk about these awful, painful memories, it will cost you, and it will cost you good.”
14
Lester rolled back onto his feet, raised a paw, and let his claws out with an unnerving schlink.“You help us, and we’ll think about helping you.”
“But you already said we would help,” Mungo pointed out, eliciting a low rumble of warning from her comrade.
“Hey now!” I shouted, beginning to panic. Sure, I could probably take a couple of stray cats if things came to blows, but I really didn’t want to beat up on the poor little kitty cats—no matter how nefarious. “Like I said, I want what you guys want.”
“I’d like old man McCaverty to toss the day’s expired lot so we can get to our lunch,” Mungo purred with a thoughtful flick of her patchy tail.
“That’s not what I was going to ask for,” Lester raged, showing off his fangs.
“Now don’t get snippy with me, Les,” Mungo warned, her tail now puffy and full like a raccoon’s. “If you knew what you wanted to ask for, you’d have asked already.”
I was beginning to see how Mr. Fluffikins was the cat to have gotten promoted out of the field. For all his faults, he could intellect circles around these two.“You don’t have to eat spoiled leftovers. I can buy you fresh fish, if you want,” I offered, hoping it would be enough to stop the coming fight. I had a feeling these two had more than just this score to settle.
Mungo deflated, returning to her normal size, then cocked her head to the side as she considered my words.
“Ohhhhh,” she purred. “Did you hear that, Lester? She’ll buy us some fresh. We haven’t had a treat like that in ages.”
“This is supposed to be a quick break, and then back to work,” Lester growled, but even he seemed to be coming around now.
I saw my opportunity and decided to go for it.“Tell you what. You stay here and think about my offer. I’ll go inside and buy some fish. You know, just in case. When I get back, the two of you can tell me what to do with it.”
“Deal!” Mungo squeaked enthusiastically.
Lester rolled his eyes but made no verbal argument.
“Okay, just wait there. I’ll be back. Right back.” I walked backward until my heel snagged a stray box and caused me to trip, then I turned around and jogged back to our pop-up psychic shop.
“Give me that ten dollars we got from Tom,” I said, nudging Melony’s shoulder and holding a hand out.
“Hey, this is mine. You didn’t want to charge him anything at all. Remember?” She turned away from me, hunching her shoulders and disappearing into her phone.
I stomped my foot.“Just give it to me.”
“No,” she mumbled.
I didn’t want to tell her anything, but giving her a trace bit of info was better than having to physically pry the money away from her. “But I have a lead on our case,” I said.
She turned to me, eyes wide.“What kind of lead?”
“There are a couple field agents hanging back in the alley. I think they’ll talk to me if I bring them some fish.” That was enough. She didn’t need anything more. She just needed to give me the money.
She shrugged and went back to her phone.“So bring them fish.” We were now to the point where even if she hadn’t tried to kill me previously, I still wouldn’t like her very much. Was this a teenager thing, or a foiled villain thing? Suddenly, I was quite glad I’d never had any kids.
I clamped a hand down onto her shoulder.“I don’t have any money on me, and I am not robbing a fishmonger when you have a perfectly good ten-dollar bill sitting in your wallet.”
“Fine. Whatever. Just go away, please.” She sighed and slipped the bill from her wallet, then balled it up and threw it at my chest.
Of course, I fumbled the crumpled currency, causing Melony to snicker and heat to rise to my cheeks. It’s not like I wanted to impress her, but I didn’t appreciate her making fun of me, either.
Once I had the tenner in hand, I hurried into OH MY COD and hoped the cats would at least be a bit patient when the promise of a fresh lunch was involved. Of course a line several customers deep had already formed before me with only a single old man to serve everyone.
“C’mon, c’mon,” I muttered under my breath.
With my luck, both Mungo and Lester would be gone by the time I returned to the alley.
15
After completing my purchase of a laughably small tilapia filet, I returned to the streets ready to wow my witnesses. Um, provided they were still there.
When I hurried out of the shop, the first thing I noticed was that the orb had begun to flash a powerful yellow that rivaled the brightness of the sun. The next was that Melony had gone missing.
Well, actually, I knew exactly where she’d gone—to commandeer my witnesses and steal all the glory for herself, no doubt.
Well, not on my watch, kiddo.
I picked up my pace and turned sharply into the alley. What I saw made me drop my newly procured bribe to the pavement.
“Melony!” I whisper-yelled, doing my best not to attract attention to the unseemly sight. “Stop that right now!”
She just laughed as Mungo, Lester, and one other cat I hadn’t yet met hung in the air a couple feet above the dumpster, unable to move anything but their wide, terrified eyes. She’d pulled this same trick on me and Greta when we first met, but that was in a private residence. Right now anyone could walk by and see her obvious display of magic.