Lynda’s face was calmly preoccupied.
“Oh, so you can talk? I thought you were pan of the bench.”
“Let the bird go. Its wing doesn’t fold like that.”
“I just want to hold it for a minute. Come on, little bird, quiet down, put your wing down.”
“You’re going to hurt it. Its heart will burst from terror.
That’s no way to handle a bird. Give it to me.“
“I’m not hurting it.”
Wizard reached, not swiftly, but efficiently, and took her right wrist between the thumb and forefinger of his right hand.
He caught it right at the soft spot between the wrist and the hand itself, just past the knobby little bones. Before she knew what he was up to, he squeezed firmly. “Hey!” she exclaimed, but she had already released the pigeon. It floundered away from her in wobbly flight to the top of a tree. The rest of the flock had fled as soon as the flap had begun.
“Why’d you do that?” she demanded angrily. He dropped her wrist hastily and leaned back on the bench. He found he was breathing heavily. Terrified. He had come so close to giving the twist and jerk that would have disabled the hand completely.
He stared at her, looking deeply at himself and what he had just done. He felt sick and his hands were gray. For a long moment the world was tilting and sliding past him. His stomach squeezed acid up into the back of his throat.
“You would have killed him,” he whispered hoarsely.
“I would not. Now look what you done. Now I got to start all over again. Here, birdies!” Lynda’threw more popcorn that bounced off the cobblestones and threw a penetrating look that struck deeply into him. “You don’t look so good. You eaten today?”
Having spoken to her once, nothing was to be gained by silence. “Not much.”
“I didn’t think so. You look worse than these pigeons. Oh, look, here they come. Not too bright, are they?”
“No, they’re not,” Wizard admitted sadly. She was right.
They were coming, the hungriest ones dropping from the trees like leaves, dipping down to peck at the farthest outreaches of the popcorn she had scattered. They were stupid, but they were his. He knew what would happen. They would come, a few at first and wary, to nip up the pieces of popcorn. Then they would get greedy, and more would come, and in the competition for the feed, they would forget the danger from the feeder.
They would jostle and push, crowding ever closer to her, until some unwary one was under her squeezing, gripping hand.
He shuddered. He picked up his own bag of popcorn and reached deep into it for a large handful. He flung it with a snap of his wrist that sent the seeds and popped corn scattering far beyond Lynda’s tossed food. His flock swooped to it, feeding well outside her perimeter- Lynda dropped plump kernels right at her feet and sat perfectly still. He felt a sweat break out on the back of his neck as the birds ventured closer. He took another handful and threw it, deliberately pelting the birds that were daringly close to her. They started back, raising reproving eyes to him. He kept his face stony. Back‘ he thought at them-
Back, you fools!
“You’re doing that on purpose‘” Lynda accused him, but she laughed as she said it. She was very pretty when she laughed, all her sulkiness fuming to softness. Like a different woman. She smiled at him looking at her, and gave her head a toss that sent her hair dancing. “Look. I give up, okay? You win. If you won’t let me feed your birds, how about you? Why don’t you let me buy you some breakfast?”
“No. Thank you. I’m not that type of person.”
She didn’t understand him and laughed at what she thought a joke. “Yeah, me neither. Let’s just go grab a sandwich and some coffee or something. I was so upset this morning, I hardly ate a thing myself. I hate to eat alone. Look, we can go right inside to the Bakery. Ever been there? Right inside the doors?
Good coffee.“ She tilted her head toward the tall glass and metal doors. Her eyes had brightened, and in her red jacket she looked like a bright bird perched on the end of the bench.
“I’ve been there,” he admitted grudgingly.
“You are such a stone-face. It wasn’t so hard to get you to eat yesterday. Look, don’t feel awkward about it. It’s just the way I am with people. I like you. I don’t even know why I say that, but it’s true. Even not knowing you much, I can tell we could be friends. Guess I knew it when I came to sit down over here. Rats!” She threw a handful of popcorn. “That’s the last of mine. Share with me, okay?”
She tweaked the bag of popcorn from his grip and put her small hand into it. His heart tried to burst from his chest. She pulled out a fistful of fragments and threw them on the ground.
“Hey, look, yours was all gone, too.” She shook the little bag upside down over the cobblestones. An errant wind carried away a few fragments of popcorn from it. Wizard stared with uncomprehending eyes. He reached numbly to take me empty bag from her fingers, but she wadded it up nimbly and stuffed it into her own empty bag. She thrust both into her pocket.
“So, that’s that! No more popcorn, so no more birds. Really, you might as well come and eat with me.”
He stared at her pocket. His throat was closed tight, too tight for any words to pass.
‘’Oh, come on,“ she begged impatiently. ”Don’t be so shy.
Look, I know about guys like you. I’m not a kid. You don’t stink like a drunk, but you don’t shake like a junkie. I think you’re just temporarily down. Lady dumped you, maybe, or your job ran out. I mean, look at how you’re dressed. You’re not really a bum. All you need is to get thinking straight again and get back on the tracks. Just have a cup of coffee and keep me company while I eat; it’s no big deal. What do you say?“
He dragged his eyes away from her pocket and up to her face. Her front teeth nibbled appealingly at her lower lip, but he scarcely noticed. He mustn’t stare at her pocket. If he agreed and went with her, he might have a chance to get his bag back.
He could offer to take her coat, to hang it on a chair or something. A quick stab of his hand into her pocket and… No. He didn’t want to feel it for himself, didn’t want to stick his hand into an empty bag with a wrinkled paper bottom. Most of all he didn’t want to pull his hand out with nothing in it for the flock. He agonized again over how it could have happened.
But it was gone, his gift taken as abruptly as it had been bestowed. He had never known how he could feed the pigeons, and now he would never understand“ how he could not.
“Lunch, then?” Her cool fingers touched his wrist, numbing it. She snatched them back with a cry of dismay and gripped her own wrist. “Oh, look at the time‘ I hate it when I’m on afternoon shift. Just about the time I start to enjoy the day, I have to rush off to work. Look, I’m sony. I have to go now if I’m going to be on time, so I can’t take you to lunch.”
He stared up at her miserably as she rose. She looked deep into his eyes and misread them. “Hey, look. It’s not that way!
I wasn’t teasing you. Look, take this,“ she dug in a bottomless purse and came up with a folded green bill. ‘Take this, I mean it, and get a bite to eat. You really look like you need it. And meet me here, tomorrow, early, and we’ll talk and have breakfast. You can tell me all about yourself. Now, don’t shake your head at me. You take this.” Boldly she tucked it into the chest pocket of his jacket. Wizard felt strangely powerless before her insistence. “You eat something, you’ll feel better, and I’ll see you tomorrow. Don’t look so surprised. That’s how I am.