"You mean you were not a good teacher?" Moira asked.
"Oh no. I was a very good teacher. The accreditation commission rated my classroom performance ’superior’. But I had taken all my math courses with an ENG prefix instead of a MA prefix."
The hedge witch frowned. "Forgive me, My Lord, but I do not understand."
Karl sighed. "Neither did I. That’s why I took a job as a software engineer—for twice as much money."
Moira thought hard for a moment.
"My Lord would you be willing to take on an additional duty? Would you be willing to teach this to others?"
Karl’s mouth quirked. "In my copious spare time?"
"It would do much to ease the suspicion and mistrust."
Karl thought about it for a moment. "I guess I can spare an hour or so a day."
"Thank you, My Lord. In the meantime, you can expect a formal visit from representatives of the Council sometime very soon."
"Ducky," Karl said with a noticeable lack of enthusiasm. "Just what we need. A project review."
Eighteen: Playing in the Bullpen
Any sufficiently advanced technology is indistinguishable from magic.
Any sufficiently advanced magic is indistinguishablefrom technology.
Any sufficiently advanced magic is indistinguishablefrom a rigged demonstration.
"We’ve got a good team," Jerry told the wizards as they walked toward the converted cow barn, now known universally as the Bullpen.
The late afternoon sun slanted golden across the court and the air smelled of warm flagstones and dust, with just a tinge of manure to remind them of the Bullpen’s original purpose.
Jerry kept up a flow of half-defensive small talk, Bal-Simba was soothing and the other two, Malus and Petronus, were distinctly cold.
"Have you had trouble adapting?" Bal-Simba asked.
"Some. It turns out that there’s a strong psychological component here. What a piece of code—a spell—does is constrained by its structure, but its manifestation, the demon it creates, is strongly influenced by the outlook and attitude of the programmer." He sighed. "It’s tough, but we’re making good progress."
"We have confidence in you, of course," the giant black magician told him. "But the Council has a responsibility to oversee any use of magic in the North."
"And to see that magic is used wisely and safely," Malus said pointedly.
"Naturally we’re glad to have you, but there probably won’t be much to see," Jerry told him. I hope, he added to himself.
Bal-Simba nodded amicably. Actually the visit was about as casual as a surprise inspection by a team of Defense Department auditors, but part of the game was to pretend otherwise.
"There have been certain questions about your performance," Bal-Simba said as they approached the door. "I fear you have not made the best possible impression."
"With all due respect, Lord, we didn’t choose our programmers to make a good impression. You need a difficult job done on a very tight schedule and we got the best people we could. I’m sorry that we aren’t more presentable, but the most talented people are often a little eccentric."
Bal-Simba nodded, thinking of some of the peculiarities of his fellow wizards.
"Some say your people are as flighty as the Little Folk," Petronus said as they reached the door to the barn.
"That’s because they don’t know them," Jerry said, reaching out to open the small door set in the larger one. "People who do what we do tend to be very concentrated on their work. They may seem a little strange to anyone on the outside, but their main goal is always to get the job done. We’ve got a good team here and they’re a pretty serious bunch."
He motioned Bal-Simba and the others ahead of him. The black giant ducked his head and stepped over the sill.
They stood together at the threshold to let their eyes adjust to the dim light. The barn still smelled of hay, grain and cattle, a dusty odor that tickled the back of the nose but not unpleasantly.
"Welcome to the…" Jerry’s head jerked back as something zoomed past his nose, climbing almost straight up.
It was a Mirage jet fighter no bigger than his thumb. As it topped out of its climb it fired two toothpick-sized missiles toward the ceiling. There above them a half-dozen tiny airplanes were mixing it up in an aerial melee. One of the Mirage’s missiles caught a miniature Mig-21 and blew its tail away. A tiny ejection seat popped out of the plane as it spiraled helplessly toward the flagstone floor and an equally tiny parachute blossomed carrying the pilot down to safety.
Jerry and the wizards gaped.
A two-inch-long F-16 peeled off from the dogfight and dove at Jerry’s head.
"Now cut that out!" Jerry roared. The fighters vanished with soft pops and there was a snickering from one corner of the Bullpen.
Bal-Simba stared off at the wall and carefully avoided saying anything.
"Ah, yes," Jerry said. "Well, ah, this is where we work."
The central aisle of the barn was taken up by a plank-and-sawhorse table piled high with books, scrolls, blank sheets of parchment, inkpots, quills and wooden tablets marked and unmarked. At the far end of the barn the whitewashed wall was streaked and smudged from being used as an impromptu whiteboard. Next to the wall sat a waist-high brazier warming an enormous pot of blackmoss tea.
The stalls were on either side of the aisles and each stall held a littered trestle table and a chair. Most of them also held at least one programmer.
"All these ones are working on one great spell?" the giant magician asked dubiously.
"Yes, Lord. We divide the work so each of us has a specific part. Our first week here was spent doing systems analysis and producing a design document so we’d all know what we were doing."
Jerry gestured at the long table. "This is our central library. We keep the project documentation and specs here where we can all consult them."
Petronus reached out to examine a large book on top of the pile. Just as his fingers touched it, the pile shifted and hissed at him. He yanked his hand back as a scaly head on a long neck rose out of the mass and slitted yellow eyes transfixed him. Sinuously a small dragon flowed out of its lair among the books. It was bigger than the beast which had guarded Wiz’s original book, perhaps two feet long. Its scales were the same vivid red, but they were tinged with blue along the edges. It eyed Bal-Simba with suspicious disapproval.
"Another demon?" the wizard asked.
"No, that’s a real dragon. Wandered in here one day and decided it liked it."
"Hunts mice real good," Danny volunteered.
Petronus sniffed and the group moved on. The dragon whuffed suspiciously, decided these people bore watching, and trailed after them, eyeing the hem of Petronus’s robe speculatively.