Then they returned to Carr Street to change for church. Orvin, Lora and Anne took confession as usual before the service. Alan arranged to meet the priest, Father Aella after the service, while Orvin escorted Lora and Anne home.
Father Aella was a tall spare man of about forty years of age. He took Alan through to his study in the rectory. “What can I do for you my son?” he asked the younger man.
“Father, it is nine months since I last confessed,” said Alan in a troubled voice.
“It’s nine months since you took Mass?”
“No, Father, that’s not the same thing. I took Mass unconfessed,” replied Alan.
“Obviously you know that is in itself a sin,” said Father Aella conversationally. “Why?”
“I suppose because taking Mass is a habit, and I have not confessed because of my sins.”
“Well, that’s one sin you have confessed. Shall we deal with the others?”
“I have killed. Killed many men.”
“In the course of war, when they were attacking you?”
“Mainly. Many at Hastings during the battle. There was one I killed on Christmas Day outside where the king was being crowned, to make a point and establish my authority when he defied me. That was done for what I saw as being a good purpose, to have the houses being set on fire extinguished, and he was preventing me from doing that. Three men who were robbers who myself and my party caught in the act of killing, robbing and ravishing. In battle recently were hundreds who did not die by my hand, but on my orders- and died most horribly and painfully. That was defending a village from being pillaged by the Danes. Others I have had judicially put to death because of their crimes. These all weigh on my mind. And I have stolen, stolen from the dead at Hastings- but not the dying, nor did I hasten the death of any of the wounded for the purposes of robbery.”
“You were poor then? I thought so. But by your appearance you are not now poor? You now have your own lands somewhere else, as I have not seen you before? If you don’t mind me saying so, such sins are not unusual for men who have called to be soldiers. Have you raped? No? Killed wantonly or stolen from the poor? No? Fornicated? Yes? Well that’s again not an unusual sin for any man,” continued the priest.
“I kept a mistress for five months, had carnal knowledge of several women while on campaign and I am now cohabiting with the woman I am due to wed in several weeks time. That last is one thing I do not intend to seek absolution for, as I intend to continue with that sin!” continued Alan.
Father Aella smiled slightly, without saying anything on this point as he’d heard the other side of the position in confession a little earlier in the day. “And has anything good come from your actions?”
“From the thefts, yes. I used the money I obtained to buy the weapons I needed to equip my own men, who later fought to save a village and to destroy a raiding party of Danes. By killing the Danes we saved dozens of lives in that village and rescued hundreds of English that they had taken as captives. By killing the robbers I saved two women from death, including the woman I now love. I have become moderately wealthy and can now help others,” said Alan thoughtfully. “The judicial killings I don’t really count as I was in effect acting as Caesar and imposing the penalties that law of the land provides, with little choice.”
“So good has come from bad, and nothing you have said is anything I would say to be evil or to endanger your immortal soul. But obviously they weigh heavily on you, more so than on any other soldier I have met, who I must say seem to be a fairly hardened lot. Why is that and why have you not felt able to be confessed by your parish priest?” asked Father Aella gently.
“I know that the Holy Bible states we must not judge others, but Brother Godwine is a nearly illiterate country priest who keeps his own mistress and probably helped my former steward steal from me. More particularly, he’s lazy and fails to provide properly for the spiritual needs of his congregation. The benefice is within my giving but I haven’t had the chance to seek a more suitable candidate,” said Alan with a frown on his brow. “As to the first part of your question, perhaps I’m not really cut out to be a soldier. I was an oblate at a monastery for several years.”
“Hmm… perhaps a warrior-priest, and by that I don’t mean in the manner of Bishop Odo! And given how busy you seem to have been committing what you think of as sins I’m not surprised that you haven’t had time to seek a more suitable priest. I think I know of a man at the priory who may be suitable as a parish priest, but whether he would consent to accept a benefice in a small country village I don’t know. Certainly he’s quite wasted doing menial work at the priory and could better do God’s work out in the community. He’s about thirty, intellectual, compassionate and warm, practical and something of an ascetic. You would be able to discuss matters of faith and theological interpretation with him- he’s much more knowledgeable than I! His name is Brother Wacian and he’s a minor assistant in the infirmary. If we go up to the priory now they’ll probably still be serving food at the refectory when we get there and then I can introduce you.
“What we seem to have is a Crisis of Faith, in that you feel overwhelmed by sin and believe that this means that you are damned to hell for all eternity. We British, including the clergy, are not as strict in our interpretations as the clerics of France. You speak in an educated manner. You say you were an oblate at a monastery?”
“Yes, at Rouen for several years before it was decided that my path lay outside the clergy. I wasn’t sufficiently devout in the observation of my duties and left before taking vows; to be more precise I was expelled.”
Father Aella gave a chuckle. “Rouen is known for the strictness of its interpretation of the scriptures. As a brief history lesson, the church here in Britain was founded by monks from Ireland, where the Faith had flourished during the Dark Times. The Blessed Columba founded the monastery at Iona in the Scottish Isles and preached Christianity to the Picts. Saint Aidan was from Ireland and established the monastery at Lindisfarne, and Saint Wilfred studied at Lindisfarne and brought the Word south to Sussex. Pope Gregory sent Saint Augustine to Canterbury, but the British clergy refused to assist him or to acknowledge his claim of supremacy over them. There was dispute between those clerics who followed the Irish rites and those who followed the Latin rites. The hand of Rome still rests lightly on her church in Britain- much more lightly than Pope Alexander would wish! Most of the bishops in Britain barely acknowledge the supremacy of the papacy.
“The position of many of the church here in Britain on the issue of sexual congress is different to that adopted in France and Italy. As you will be aware many of our clergy, including anointed priests, are married. The Ten Commandments contain no denunciation of sexual activity other than that of adultery, which you haven’t committed. The Blessed Saint Paul in his Epistles to the Corinthians wrote in Greek. He denounces fornication as a sin, and used the Greek word ‘porneia’. That word means ‘illegal sex’ or ‘illicit sex’, and usually refers to incest, bestiality and adultery. By our own mores that would now include homosexuality.
“God created the human body and made sexual congress between man and woman a pleasurable activity; he would not then be so ungenerous as to use that as a trap to damn mankind to everlasting torment in hell. The scriptures instruct man to ‘go forth and multiply’ and to marry. In addition to adultery and illegal sex, casual sex for the purpose of simple bodily pleasure is sinful. Sexual congress between a man and a woman in a committed monogamous relationship for the purpose of begetting children and with the intent that the act makes the couple one both in body and in spirit is blessed, although the formalities of marriage are preferable.