“I know it doesn’t make sense. He should be Black Chess’s favorite monster, after all he did for them to win the war.”
“Then what happened to him?”
The Pillar stops the car near an abandoned building. “He’s fallen in love.”
“The Cheshire?” I laugh. “No way.”
“Yes way,” the Pillar says. “You didn’t ask with whom.”
“I don’t think I want to know. First I need the fact that he fell in love to sink in,” I say. “I mean how? He doesn’t even have a real face. Who’d love someone with no face?”
“I didn’t say he was loved back.”
“Wow. That’s even more surprising. Are you saying the evil Cheshire is a hapless romantic now?”
“Indeed.” He jumps out of the car, pulling his cane along.
I follow him down. Apparently we’re entering that abandoned building. “So who’s the unlucky girl? Or is it a cat?”
“No, it’s a girl,” the Pillar says slowly. “And it’s someone you know very well.”
“Waltraud Wagner, my warden, would be a candidate.”
“No, Alice. The Cheshire is in love with you.”
Chapter 21
We step into the abandoned building, passing by a few homeless people. Insane ones, the Pillar says. That’s why he has his rifle with him. I follow him, awaiting an answer to my question: Why would the Cheshire be in love with me?
“It’s complicated,” the Pillar says, looking sideways, in case we get attacked by another group of mad people. “Let’s start with him not really looking like a Cheshire at the moment.”
“What’s new? I wouldn’t be surprised if he is possessing a priest.”
“Worse.” The Pillar ducks, scanning the place. “This time he is possessing someone dear to you.”
“Dear to me?” I grimace. “All the people I know are Wonderlanders. I thought he can’t possess Wonderlanders.”
“Only if they’re still alive,” the Pillar says.
I stop, taking a moment to assess the possibilities. But who am I fooling? There is only one Wonderlander who’s practically dead, and so dear to me. And he has been missing for some time. “Jack?” I cup my hands on my mouth.
The Pillar nods. “Try not to scream. We don’t want to attract loonies.”
“Jack?” I whisper, gritting my teeth.
“Lowering your voice isn’t going to change my answer.” He rolls his eyes. “Yes. Jack.”
“But we’re in the future. How long has he been possessing Jack’s body?”
“Fourteen years.”
“How is that possible? This means I never saw Jack again since he disappeared from the asylum.”
“You got that right.” He crawls on all fours, and I follow him into a tunnel.
“That’s why I am not married to him.” The words are tasteless on my tongue. Not that I was sure I wanted to marry Jack. The thought just occurred to me as the natural progress of events. “This is why I am married to that stranger back home.”
“Exactly. Handsome man.”
“I didn’t meet him or see him. Couldn’t bring myself to it,” I say. “I freaked out when he called me ‘baby.’”
“Nothing wrong with your husband calling you baby once in a while.”
“Shut up.” I pout, still crawling toward a scant light in the distance. “Poor Jack.”
“The guy is a jinx,” the Pillar says. “Killed by his girlfriend, possessed by her enemy. He was better off dead.”
“Stop it, Pillar.” I grunt. “Tell me what all of this has to do with the Cheshire being in love with me. You know how creepy this feels?”
“Don’t you like his grin? I thought chicks always dig the grin.” He stops for a second. “That sounded too American. Didn’t it?”
“It did.”
“I’m not really myself in the future, am I?”
“More smartass than you usually are,” I say. “And how do you look young? You’re not a day older than when I last saw you.”
“Good genes.” He winks, and then crawls on all fours again. “Smoking hookah is good for the skin.”
“Spare me the cheesiness.” I sigh. “Now how — ”
I was going to ask about the Cheshire being in love with me again, but then it hits me. “Are you saying the Cheshire was exposed to Jack’s mind and soul?”
“We’ve arrived.” The Pillar kicks a small door open and steps out. “Try not to let the Cheshire see you before I talk to him first.”
I follow him into what looks like a large hall in a sewer. Then when I stand up, I see the Cheshire. Oh my God. What happened to him?
Chapter 22
The Cheshire is sitting on a chair in the middle of the stinking room. Water is dripping somewhere nearby. He is playing cards with a dead mad man on the opposite side of the table. I watch him lay his cards down while in Jack’s body. Then he possesses the man in front of him for the next move. Then back to Jack.
“Cheshire.” The Pillar approaches him with his rifle in his hand. I stay back like he told me. Seeing Jack having turned into a puppet on a cat’s string is breaking my heart. I doubt there’s anything I can do for him after all these years. Jack didn’t even flinch for the moment when the Cheshire left his body. The boy must be really dead now.
“Pillar?” Jack — I mean the Cheshire — says. “Want to play cards?”
I think the notorious cat has really lost it.
“I see you have a partner already,” the Pillar says, playing along.
“He’s dumb,” the Cheshire complains. “Every moves he makes, I already know.”
“Oh, it’s like you can read his mind.” The Pillar glances back to me for a second. Then back to him. “I guess it means you’re a genius.”
“You think?” The Cheshire’s grin is a lame, timid curve on Jack’s haggard and older face. Who would have thought? “Please come play with me, Pillar.”
“How about I tell you jokes?” the Pillar says. “I can make you laugh.”
“Jokes don’t work,” the Cheshire scolds. “I’ve been telling myself jokes for fourteen years.”
“Laughed your tail off?”
“On the contrary — I’ve never laughed once,” the Cheshire says. “You know why?”
“Depressed being in someone else’s body?”
“No, because I knew those jokes.”
“Maybe the greatest joke you never admitted was yourself.”
“It’s true.” The Cheshire lowers Jack’s head. I can’t believe my eyes. “I lost myself in someone who isn’t me.”
“Jack?”
“Yes. But you have no idea, Pillar. The things I heard in Jack’s mind. The emotions. The sacrifice. It’s addictive.”
“Addictive enough you gave up on your quest to burn every human being alive?”
“I don’t hate humans anymore.” He chuckles. It sounds as if he’s crying. “That’s why Black Chess gave up on me. They say I betrayed them.”
“Why do you love humans all of a sudden?”
“Jack.”
“You said that before.”
“And Alice.” The Cheshire holds the Pillar’s hand. Eagerly. For the first time, I see Jack’s eyes sparkle like they used to in the past. “If you only know how I — I mean Jack loves her. It’s mind-boggling.”
“Listen, Chesh.” The Pillar glances at his watch. “Since you love Alice so much now, she could use a favor. Can you do that?”
“Alice?” The Cheshire suddenly realizes I am in the room. The way he stares at me is the optimum of madness: to love the eyes looking at you, and hate the soul that occupies them.
Chapter 23
“Alice!” The Cheshire — Jack — or whoever that is — runs to me and wraps his arms around me.
I stand stiff with a tear on the verge of rolling down my cheek. I don’t know who is who. But I miss Jack so much. This body holding me smells of him. It talks like him. And I might want to kiss him like I wanted to kiss Jack.
“I missed you so much, Alice.” He holds my head between my hands, Jack’s eyes melting me on the inside.