“She sacrificed her love to save the students on the bus,” said the mousy chauffeur, having just arrived from eavesdropping on Mr. Tick and Mrs. Tock in the Inklings.
The Pillar, sitting in the back, smiled. He had both hands rested on his cane. His smile was thin, the chauffeur thought. But he understood. The situation was complicated. Alice, evil or good, was doomed.
“So is that it?” The chauffeur felt uncomfortable about the Pillar’s silence. “She saves the world, fails to find her Wonder, and ends up dead in the past?”
The Pillar tapped his cane. Said nothing.
“That’s not fair,” the chauffeur said. “I mean, she really changed the world. Why does she have to die, let alone live in this kind of misery?”
The Pillar resorted to silence again and again.
“Shouldn’t we see changes in this future because of the things she changed?” the chauffeur tried one last time.
The Pillar leaned back, staring out of the window. It had started to rain, and looking outside was like looking at a mirror buried in the mist. “You ever been in love?” the Pillar said.
The chauffeur shrugged. “Once.”
“Really?”
“Of course. Everyone must have been in love once.”
“Not an ugly mouse like you.”
The chauffeur knew the Pillar was joking. “I fell in love with a girl, mousy like me. We suited each other. In fact, she loved me a lot.”
“If so, why aren’t you with her now?”
“Because I’m with you, professor.”
“Why are you with me?”
“I believe in your cause—morally controversial, yes, but I’d like to help.”
“I didn’t know you were a miserable liar,” the Pillar said.
“Liar?”
“You’re not here because of me. You’re here because of the money I pay.”
“What’s wrong with a man needing a job?”
“I’ll tell you what’s wrong,” the Pillar said. He leaned forward, one hand gripping the back of the passenger seat. “You’re not spending time with the one you love, thinking that making money and securing your future will help you prosper, so you can finally spend time with her.”
“Professor.” The chauffeur shrugged. “What are you telling me?”
“Go back home,” the Pillar said. “Give me the keys, and go back to your loved one. Forget about me and Alice. This war that’s coming isn’t for everyone, unless you’re really ready.”
“Ready for what?”
“To give up on your loved ones.”
Chapter 80
THE PAST: BUS STATION, OXFORD
Making out so bluntly with my future husband is like reaching the last rung on the ladder of insanity — let alone the fact I just said future husband.
My lips on that boy are in severe pain. A strange pain. I close my eyes, wishing Jack would just disappear behind me. Hoping he gets the message and hates me for the rest of his life.
But Jack doesn’t.
He taps me on the shoulder. I try not to turn around. I’d prefer he walks away with my back to him.
“Hey,” the boy says. “She’s mine.”
I come to understand the boy and Jack might get into a fight. So I give in and turn to face Jack.
Keep the tears locked inside, Alice. Just for a minute. If Jack sees you crying he’ll figure out something is wrong.
“Is that why you were surprised I came back from the bathroom?” Jack’s pain is painted like a Picasso on his face. “Is that why you suddenly didn’t want to get on the bus?”
“I—”
I have nothing to say.
Lorina takes the opportunity and backs Jack up. I can’t quite hear what she says. All my senses are focused on Jack’s pain. Generally, she is calling me all kinds of bad things.
Jack’s eyes lock with mine. He must be seeing a stupid teenage girl, reckless and selfish. I see beautiful eyes that will enjoy a prosperous life and will not die young.
The tension breaks with the bus’s ticket thrown at my face. It’s not Lorina who does it. But Jack. Lorina smiles broadly and takes Jack’s arm.
“I never want to see you again,” Jack says. “I should have known. You’re weird.”
“She is mentally cuckoo,” Lorina offers. Her friends laugh. “Trust me, I know. She’s my sister.”
“I should’ve listened to the rumors,” Jack says.
“Rumors?” It’s all I can say.
“They said you were some kind of a witch or something. You and your Wonderland creeps.”
“Let’s go, Jack,” Lorina says. “You don’t need this trip. I have a surprise for you.”
Jack’s last stare at me is full of disappointment. Borderline hatred. I’m sure it can’t be fixed in the future now.
Go away, Jack. Go with Lorina. Stay alive.
My future husband senses the tension and holds me before I collapse under the weight of my pain. I pretend I like it, watching Jack walk away.
With every step, I get this warm feeling up my nostrils. I realize it’s blood. My time in the past is scant. I may have saved Jack, and the bus, but I haven’t found my Wonder. I haven’t saved myself.
But Jack returns for one last scene. An unexpected one, really. “Here.” He hands me a necklace. “It’s yours, and I don’t want anything that reminds me of you.”
“Mine?” I stare at it, remembering he talked to me about it earlier. But I don’t recognize it.
“You don’t even remember you gave it to me?” Jack says. “I bet you give it to all the boys.”
“What’s this for?” I stare at the necklace in my hand and realize there is a key attached to it. The key has a drawing of the Six Keys on it. On the back is that strange number 14 again. This is the key to where I keep the rest of Six Impossible Keys.
The irony.
I stand with the necklace in my hand. The keys. The reason why I embarked on this journey from the beginning. I’ve exchanged Jack’s life for the keys. No wonder they never found the rest of them. I kept them with Jack.
“I don’t want the necklace,” I scream at Jack. The pain is too strong. I don’t know why I do it, but I throw the keys back in his face. They’ll end up in Black Chess’s hands if I keep them with me. Jack catches them, as if a tiny piece of him still wants to carry a memory of me.
Then he disappears.
My bleeding intensifies and I begin to feel dizzy. In only minutes I’ll die, it seems. All I need now is to make sure the bus is safe.
I watch it arrive. The yellow school bus slows down by the curb. Most girls forget about the drama, excited by the trip they’re about to take.
You did it, Alice. You did it.
I watch the girls get on the bus, my nose bleeding faster, but my heart is fluttering with victory. It’s hard to imagine that I started this journey looking for a bunch of keys. Here I am, ending up with a bitter victory. But it’s the right thing to do.
Without me on the bus, the future can change. Who said we can’t change the past, Mrs. Tock?
Chapter 81
THE PRESENT: INSIDE THE INKLINGS, OXFORD
“Did we just get the keys back?” Mr. Tick squinted at the dying Alice on the table.
“I’m not sure, Mr. Tick,” his wife said. “Alice found the keys, but I think she threw them back to Jack.”
“She also looks like she is going to pass on killing her classmates.” Mr. Tick didn’t look happy about it.
“Can’t have all the cake, Mr. Tick.”