Ignoring his father, Jax motions for me to follow. “Come on, I’ll grab us some waters and we can take a walk outside while we talk, if you want.”
“That would be great, thank you.”
Surprisingly, our conversation flows freely as we walk. Unlike Senator Knight, every question seems to be answered without rehearsed speech. Our banter is easy, natural, and so many of his responses border on flirting, but he doesn’t cross the line.
“So, what made you get into the world of Financial Management?” I know he made a name for himself in managing high net wealth personal portfolios. The Wall Street Journal even took notice of the returns he secured last year for his investors.
“My father,” Jax responds with a truthful answer that I don’t expect.
“Not your first choice, huh?”
He laughs, “Nope. Don’t get me wrong, I’ve done well, and it’s an interesting enough job.”
“But…,” I encourage him to continue. Obviously there’s more to his statement.
“But, what I really would love to do isn’t exactly a great long term career move.”
“And that is?”
Jax smiles sheepishly, he almost seems embarrassed to admit his childhood dream. “I always wanted to get into pro boxing. I’ve been doing it since I was a kid.”
I stop in my tracks. Jax takes two steps more before realizing I’m not walking next to him anymore.
“Liv. You okay? You’re scaring me again.” One arm quickly reaches for me, as if he’s afraid I’m going to lose my balance again.
The reality of what’s been hanging over my head since I was given this assignment finally hits me and I feel sick. Allowing it to sink in for the first time that, no matter how much I want the story not to be true, I can’t change the truth. Time freezes, my anything’s possible life suddenly flashes before my eyes. Doors that I see open in my future slam shut and I just know nothing will ever be the same from this point on.
“Liv. Do you need to sit down?” There’s concern on his face and I realize I didn’t even notice him coming to stand in front of me, both his arms holding my shoulders tightly. I’ve actually lost time, stuck somewhere in my own head.
Shaking my head to physically force myself to snap out of it, I finally regain my senses. “I’m fine. I’m sorry. I should’ve eaten something this morning. Sometimes my blood sugar gets a little low and I get a little foggy,” I lie.
“Come on, let me sugar you up inside.”
Once inside, Jax makes me sit and eat some fruit and drink a full bottle of Gatorade before he allows me to stand. Yet another thing he has in common with Vinny, bellowing demands that I seem to follow like a petty officer to a drill sergeant.
“You sure you’re okay?”
“I’m fine. I’m sorry, I didn’t mean to scare you.”
“You know, if you want me to hold you, you could just ask. You don’t need to pretend you’re going to faint.”
“What? I wasn’t…” I’m about to set him straight when I look up and see he’s joking written on his face. He laughs and it helps me relax a bit.
“You sure you don’t have any more questions for me?” Jax smiles in response to my telling him I’m done and should probably go. Standing, I casually grab both our empty drink bottles from the table and head to the garbage. Just as I’m about to toss his in, I change my mind and slip it into my jacket pocket. Hoping he didn’t notice, I walk to the sink and set my plate down in the basin.
Turning around, I find Jax standing behind me. Close. Too close. My back to the sink, I have no room to back up to put the requisite personal space between us. He notices my looking around, ready to make my escape, and puts one hand on either side of the sink and cages me in, his body close enough to feel the heat resonating from him, but not actually touching. “Have dinner with me, Liv.”
Oh boy. “I, I can’t. I have a boyfriend.” Who I’m pretty sure at this point also happens to also be your brother.
“I don’t see a ring on your finger.” He arches one eyebrow and smirks. “One date. Tonight.”
“My boyfriend is here with me, I don’t think it would sit well if I told him I was going on a date tonight.”
Releasing me from where he’d cornered me, he grins. “My loss. You know where to find me if you change your mind.”
I help Paul pack up his equipment and the entire Knight family walks us to our car. “Thank you so much for all of your time.” I address all three members of the family. “It was very nice meeting you.” Senator Knight and Mrs. Knight say their goodbyes and chat with Paul about getting advance copies of the photos to review. Jax walks me to my side of the car. I extend my hand. “It was nice meeting you, Jax.”
“You too, Liv.” He pulls my hand in his toward him and turns my shake into a hug.
Laughing, because it’s done playfully more than harassingly, I whisper in his ear before pulling away. “You should give boxing a shot. Don’t ever give up your dreams.”
Chapter 30
Vince
It’s starting to get dark as I begin my run back to the hotel. I have no idea where the time went. The five mile run to Arlington Cemetery couldn’t have taken more than a half hour, which would mean I spent four hours wandering around and sitting at my father’s graveside. I’d seen pictures of the cemetery on TV, but nothing could have prepared me for the emotions I felt walking in and seeing miles and miles of stark white headstones perfectly lined up, many with American flags waving in the afternoon breeze.
Thoughts of lives lost and other kids growing up without a parent should have been what consumed me, but instead I sat next to his grave and played the What If head game I’ve been playing with myself since I was a kid. What if my father had come home instead of being lost at war? Would my mother have been different? Maybe not strung out for most of my childhood? What if he’d been there every night when I came home from school?
All around D.C., I pass families walking together as I run back to the hotel. They’re taking in the sights and having a good time. A young boy and his father pose in front of the Lincoln Memorial while the mom takes the picture, all three smiling at the memories they’re creating. It makes me run faster. Anger rises from within me, anger for my father not coming home, but even more anger for my mother not stepping up and being the parent she needed to be.
I don’t even remember the last mile of the run, sprinting the entire time so fast that I still haven’t caught my breath when I walk back into the hotel room.
“Hey.” Liv looks up from where she’s sitting on the bed, typing on her laptop. I don’t respond. Instead I stalk to her and ravel her hair around my hand and yank her head back, giving me access to her mouth that I so desperately need.
She doesn’t complain, even though I’m completely drenched in sweat and just marched in like a complete asshole. She kisses me back. Hard. Almost like she needs it as bad as I do.
“Need you,” I mumble into her mouth without letting her come up for air.
“Need you too,” she whimpers, her words barely heard, smothered under my kiss.
“How was your interview?” An hour later, I finally ask the question I should have asked walking in the door. But I just fucking needed her. Needed her to erase all the shit going through my head. Help me get rid of the anger. I know it’s not fair, she doesn’t deserve to be on the receiving end of my shit, but I just couldn’t help it. Loathing myself for the way I treat her deep down inside, I try to soothe things over, even though she never complained.