Remembering the way Ed Sneezley had screamed and carried on was very fresh in Harrison Bussey's head. And that old fart Delbert Digbee would have to remind him, too.
So that was the reason that reason prevailed over Harrison and he had decided to give the old Moosers a more sedate evening of entertainment.
Tonight, Harrison had planned to play Stag Mooser.
CHAPTER ELEVEN
Which was a very easy game to play.
And no Mooser would end up cockless or hurt or maimed.
To get the game ready, Harrison had had to go down Baltic Avenue in Tweedy town, make a right at St. James Avenue, cross the old tracks until he came to Sam's Clip Joint, which was just a fucked-up name for the best barber shop in nil of Tweedy. There, he asked old hairless Sam to give him fifteen reels of first-rate porno film.
Harrison paid him one hundred dollars and he didn't end up in jail.
Well, the easiest part had been accomplished.
Now came the hard part. To prove to his fellow Moosers that an old-fashioned smoker was still just as exciting as getting a blow job off old Gloria, or drilling fourteen black Cleveland assholes, or letting fifteen Cincinnati whores sit on their pricks all at different times.
"Hear me, fellow Moosers! Tonight will be different!"
"Hooray."
"Let's hear a cheer for a real Mooseketeer!"
"Yeah! What we going to play tonight, Mr. Bull Moose!"
"Well," Harrison said, holding up his antlers for attention. "Tonight we're going to play Stag Mooser!"
"Yippee!"
"Great! Did ya hear that, Sam? We're gonna play Stag Mooser!"
"What the fuck's Stag Mooser?"
"Stag Mooser," Harrison explained above the din of fourteen, er, thirteen cigar-smoking, beer-belching Moosers, "is where fourteen stag movies will be shown."
Silence.
Then a couple of grumbles. One belch. Two burps. A couple of tarts. Much shuffling of feet.
Finally Delbert Digbee stood up. "Mr. Bull Moose. Uh, is that all we're gonna play tonight? What the fuck is this! Some of us Moosers pay fifty bucks a month dues to have some real moose-type action."
Harrison turned red beneath his antlers. Briefly wondered what would happened if he were impeached from office, or worse, if he were forced to leave the Moosers.
God, what would he do then?
Well, the Optimist Club did meet on Tuesday nights. But, hell, the Optimist Club didn't have any moose-type name. Also, they didn't have a name like an animal. Shit.
Harrison sucked up some courage. "Now, Mooser Digbee, after losing a fellow member's member last week, I thought we'd cool things off until I find out if ex-Mooser Sneezley will be suing us Moosers."
That startled many Moosers. A lawsuit against them? No, can't be. Moosers don't get sued, they get shot.
Some more mumbles. A grumble. One fart, two belches and three burps later, the Moosers all decided to cool it and have some innocent fun.
So they passed the popcorn balls around, took off their fake moose hooves, relaxed while Harrison set up the projector.
Harrison sighed with relief as he picked up the first reel of hard-core film. He wound it through the right gears and cogs, then flicked the switch and joined his fellow Moosers in farting and belching as he watched the screen intently.
The title of the movie was innocent enough: SUZY EATS COCKS WITH RELISH.
The picture started innocently enough.
There on the four-by-four silver screen was the blurred image of a blonde, maybe twenty-eight or so, with her back to the camera.
Suddenly from off to the left, a cock made its entrance, coming off the celluloid and into the view of the Moosers.
It was a very big cock or, at least, it was big in relation to the size of the film. Or else the girl was a midget. Or else the cock was made out of paper-mache to be worn as a costume by some horny kid on Halloween night while he said, "Trick or Treat" in a red-light district.
Several Moosers oooohed and aaaaahed.
The blonde also looked like she was saying aaaaahhhh. She had to because the cock came into clear focus it was about two feet long and it had a little ribbon tied around the base with a sign hanging from the ribbon.
The sign said: WHAT? WIENIES AGAIN? WITH RELISH?
And as the blonde said aaaaaahhhh, the huge two-foot cock/weiner was slowly fed into her mouth and her lips formed the word oooohhhhh.
Several Moosers got erections at the sight of a two-foot-long cock going into the blonde's mouth.
Delbert Digbee guffawed.
Harrison Bussey sat up in his chair, his hamhocks hanging over the edge as he peered at the blonde girl that was imitating a sword-swallower and was chomping on a foot of cock.
Now, the blonde turned profile to the Moosers. "Hey… who is that?"
"Jesus… she sure looks familiar."
"Shut the fuck up! That's only SUZY WHO EATS COCKS WITH RELISH. Har, har, har!"
Harrison stood up, then sit down as his shadow was cast very immensely on the screen and several of the Moosers became ferociously feline and made screeching catcalls at him.
God! That girl! That blonde! That Suzy Who Eats Cocks With Relish!
Harrison knew who she was! No! It couldn't be!
But it was.
It was Suzy Cocteau. The shy girl that he had shared so many classes with in high school. No!
But it was Suzy Cocteau!
But she sure wasn't shy any more. Not unless shy girls eat cocks – but all the Moosers knew only bald girls eat cocks, shy girls only fuck them.
Harrison wiped his brow, squinted his eyes. He couldn't believe that was Suzy Cocteau chewing on three quarters of that, two-foot-long cock with that much zeal and that much relish.
Was that the same Suzy Cocteau who used to wear two bras to school?
Was that the same Suzy who used to make artsy-fartsy things like miniature Eiffel Towers out of paper clips?
Yes, it was.
Harrison viewed that blonde huffing and puffing on a cock that was halfway into her belly.
Yes, it was Suzy Cocteau, all right.
It was the first time he had seen her naked – shit, it was the first time anybody in Tweedy had seen her naked.
And it was the first time he had seen her chomping on a cock, sucking a prick like she ate them daily. And those artsy-fartsy hands were doing all kinds of things to that beautiful prick.
Yes, it was Suzy Cocteau all right, the same girl with the same artistic hands who was making an Eiffel Tower out of a human prick instead of out of paper clippings.
Amazing.
Harrison sat back in his chair, listened to the other Moosers as recognition of the cocksucking girl came to them.
They were just awed – Suzy Cocteau used to be so sweet and innocent, so naively beautiful.
Shit, she wasn't the sexy, scrumptious blonde cock-eater they saw on the screen; Suzy Cocteau had brains, was going to get somewhere using her noodle instead of her mouth.
Harrison shook his head. Then his cock grew very hard, very bulgy as he watched that cocksucking mouth moving so sensuously over a two-foot cock. With relish.
Then he realized why he was getting a foot-long erection that couldn't possibly match that enormous thing on the screen.
Their high-school reunion was only two weeks away – and Suzy Cocteau, this Suzy Cocteau that was getting her tonsils and mouth and lips and face creamed with something as thick as mushroom gravy but which most Moosers called cum, had RSVP'd and said she'd be there.
Harrison's cock lurched at the thought of talking to Suzy Cocteau in person. He was anxious to see her in person.
He licked his lips with relish.