Mum ignored my confusion. “Laurie’s got her in. They needed another shop assistant.”
“I’m going out.” I couldn’t think. I needed to see Dawn, talk to her…
“Again?”
“I’ll be back in an hour.”
At least, I thought I would.
* * * *
She was coming out as I was going in. We stood there for a moment, just looking at each other, the weight of what we’d done, how we felt, what we knew, hovering over us like an anvil. And then it fell. She threw her arms around me and I held her, right there in front of the health club with people walking in and out around us.
“I’m so sorry, David,” she whispered against my neck, and I felt the hot wetness of her tears.
“We need to go somewhere.” I meant away from the entrance of the health club-at least, that’s what I meant out loud. What I really meant was we had to go away together, run away somewhere, live happily ever after.
“Come on.” She took my hand and led me around the side of the building. Parking was in back, so it was quiet here, and she squeezed my hand as she stopped. “Your mum knows.”
I nodded. “I know.”
“Did she say anything to you?”
“No.” I shook my head. “What did she say to you?”
“She told me she and your dad had talked about it and decided I needed to find my own place.”
I stared at her. “Did she say…she heard…or saw…?”
“Your mum?” Dawn snorted. “She’d never. No…she just said she’d already talked to Laurie, who said I could move in with her. Your dad rented a truck and helped me move my stuff. It happened…very fast.”
“Overnight!” I shook my head, shoving my hands into my pockets. “She told me to stay at…”
“Julie’s.” Dawn swallowed, looking at me. “David, I did an awful thing…”
“More awful than what we’ve been doing?”
“That hasn’t been awful!” She slipped her arms around me, resting her head against my chest. “Do you think it’s been awful?”
I didn’t want to tell her how amazing, how beautiful, how incredible… “I know you told Jules.”
“Oh, David, I’m so sorry.”
I kissed the top of her blonde head. “She doesn’t care.”
“She’s…” I felt her sobs. She was doing it silently, as if I wouldn’t know. I wanted to make it all okay and I just couldn’t. She gave a hitching breath and said, “She’ll be good for you.”
She smiled, a brave-girl sort of smile, the kind she always gave me whenever my mum and dad were fighting when we were little and she was trying to cheer me up and let me know it was all going to be okay.
“I don’t want…” I lifted her face in my hands, kissed the tears off her cheeks. Her eyes said everything and I knew mine must too. “Oh Dawnie, I want you. I can’t help it, I do.”
“I want you too,” she whispered. I kissed her, tasting the salt of her tears, licking it from her lips. I didn’t want any evidence of pain left when we were through. “But I have something else to tell you. I’ve been so stupid. My parents are moving to Turkey and I thought I could stay here if…if…”
“What?” I stared at her, the puzzle pieces falling into place. “Oh my god, Dawnie. Is that what all this was about?”
“At first, I guess it was.” She trembled in my arms as if it were cold outside instead of a warm summer evening. “But it isn’t anymore. Not anymore.”
I couldn’t believe it. I had to say it out loud. “You were fucking me so you could stay in the country?”
“It was stupid, I know. I thought maybe if someone would marry me…” She bit her lip. “You or Ken maybe…”
“Ken?” I scoffed. “You would have married Ken?”
“I was desperate!” She moved away, wiping at her cheeks with her hands, trying to compose herself. “And now I’ve ruined everything. You hate me. Your parents hate me. Study Abroad is going to kick me out for sure…and I’m going to have to move to Turkey!”
“I don’t hate you.” I was too full of emotion not to confess it. “Dawn, I love you.”
“You do?”
“I’d marry you tomorrow if it would keep you with me.” I reached out to clasp her hand, wanting more of her and afraid to ask for it.
“You would?” She squeezed back.
“I don’t even care if you don’t love me. I don’t care.” It was true. I loved her and it was all that mattered.
“But I do.” Her eyes tilted up at me. “Oh David, I’ve always loved you.”
“Then marry me.” I reached for her without thinking, wrapping her up in my arms.
“But…” She gaped up at me at this proposal. “You don’t even have a job!”
“Oh bloody hell!” I rolled my eyes. “Are you going to start in on that too?”
She grinned. “You know, I gave my notice here and talked you up quite a bit. My boss was very interested. The job’s probably yours if you want it.”
“So I can slut around at the health club all day and call it working?” I pulled her into the saddle of my hips, seeing her eyes light up.
“I don’t care what you do,” she murmured as I kissed her breathless. “As long as you come home to me at night.”